THROWDOWN! FIGHT TO THE FINISH! WHO WILL SURVIVE!?

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LockeZ
I'd really like to get rid of LockeZ. His play style is way too unpredictable. He's always like this too. If he ran a country, he'd just kill and imprison people at random until crime stopped.
5958
In this thread, you come up with a deathmatch between two battlers. The next person, very briefly, answers who would win and why/how. Then they post their own two contestants, whose battle the next person will decide the winner of.

Try to keep the answers to two or three sentences at most, unless it just deeply pains your soul not to explain the battle in detail.

I will begin:

Dr. House vs. Dr. Zoidberg
Shot:

The battle was intense between House and Zoidberg; they were equally matched. Eventually, it ended in a draw, with the winner to be decided by the judges. "Who should we declare as winner?" asked one judge. "Why not Zoidberg?" said the other. And Zoidberg it is.

Firion vs John Cena
Craze
why would i heal when i could equip a morningstar
15150
Firion can use any weapon ever, especially if it has a bit of rope attached. John Cena is only a monk-class with some points in improvised materials. As long as the duel was expected, Firion would beat him hands-down.

lockez vs craze

Mona Lisa (the painting) vs A Dead Battery
Jeroen_Sol
Nothing reveals Humanity so well as the games it plays. A game of betrayal, where the most suspicious person is brutally murdered? How savage.
3885
The battery breaks open, and sulfuric acid spills all over Mona Lisa's canvas! Her face distorts in terror as it slowly dissolves. It's an overwhelming victory for the dead battery!

Rydia vs Quistis vs Franziska von Karma

I couldn't pick two out of the three of them.
LockeZ
I'd really like to get rid of LockeZ. His play style is way too unpredictable. He's always like this too. If he ran a country, he'd just kill and imprison people at random until crime stopped.
5958
The two Final Fantasy characters can shoot lightning bolts, cause earthquakes, and summon elemental spirits to aid them in battle. Von Karma unfortunately won't have much chance to make use of her mediocre whippin' skillz and fantastic sass. Quistis can cast Curaga, so I think she's the winner.


Ganondorf vs. The Powerpuff Girls
Ratty524
The 524 is for 524 Stone Crabs
12986
Ganondorf would probably... Lose. The Powerpuff girl's lightning speed and coordination would outpace Ganondorf's sluggish attacks, assuming we are going by his Super Smash Bros. incarnation. If not, then the girls still hold a likely victory as they've fought their fare share of giant, snarling beasts in the past, and Dorf's pig form probably wouldn't be much different.

Porky (Earthbound) vs. Chara (Undertale)
I mean, in both his incarnations Porky has a giant spider robot, as well as the help of a supernaturally powerful slave that does his bidding without question. As far as I know personally Chara is just a murderer with a knife. Knife vs Spider Robot seems like an obvious conclusion to me.

Speaking of robots and the supernatural...

Doctor Octopus vs. Tetsuo (Akira)
Tetsuo took a blast from an ion cannon from space and survived, and while I'm sure that Doc Ock has done some ridiculous things, assuming that Tetsuo is at the height of his power prior to losing control rapidly and turning into something...else, I'm going to have to give it to Tetsuo.

Time for a Masamune Battle-

Frog & Mitsurugi vs Sephiroth
pianotm
The TM is for Totally Magical.
32347
Well Frog has a bit of experience saving the world from cosmic horrors. If it had been just him and Sephiroth, I'd have had a hard time figuring this one out, but adding Mitsurugi to the mix changes things. While she's probably not on the skill level of Frog and Sephiroth, she provides the distraction needed to swing this in Frog's favor.

Motoko Kasanagi vs Terminator
Motoko Kasanagi, hands down, she would outsmart Terminator, faster, more agile. I'm pretty sure she's even stronger... But it's hard to tell. I just remember her battle with the giant tank in the GitS movie. I'd be really sad if Motoko lost though.. i'm biased.

Terminator is good at walking straight at you. I think you would need a lot more then that to defeat Motoko.


(terminator pulls out his shotgun, and walks straight into a coffee shop that Motoko is reading her favorite book, in.
boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. and it's all over. he won.
)

Itachi vs Pain

Pain flicks his wrist lazily, and Itachi gets crushed by immense gravity. No ifs. No buts. No long-winded monologues that last 27 episodes. Just... BAM! Instant kill. Much to the disappointment of Itachi fans all over the world.

Hakase and Nano (nichijou) vs Usopp
LockeZ
I'd really like to get rid of LockeZ. His play style is way too unpredictable. He's always like this too. If he ran a country, he'd just kill and imprison people at random until crime stopped.
5958
Nano attempts to fire a rocket, but unbeknownst to her, her wind-up key has been modified by Hakase to instead activate a player piano that's hidden inside her chestplate. Usopp shoots them.

Giant robot versions of the Ghostbusters vs. Zombie Godzilla
The Robo-Ghostbusters have a natural advantage over undead opponents. They outnumber and outrange Zombie Godzilla, and can unleash the Super Mega Cross-Beams Attack that quickly takes care of the ol' pile-o-bones. Robo-Ghostbusters win.


Wayne Gretzky vs Michael Jordan
pianotm
The TM is for Totally Magical.
32347
Michael Jordan used to be the greatest basketball player so he does his signature dunk, but he's lost his edge thanks to trying to play a bunch of sports he sucks at, so when Gretzky, who has never sucked (and who spent a year on the St. Louis Blues), slapshots, the basketball explodes and Jordan is on his ass! Gretzky for the win!

Mystery Inc. & Scooby Doo vs. The Hardy Boys & Nancy Drew.
The duel was a sleuth-off. Whoever could solve a certain case first wins. Really, it would've been a fair fight, if it were not for the fact that the culprit was not actually wearing a scary mask and riding on some urban legend in the first place. Hardy Boys and Nancy Drew wins (eventually).

Cthulhu vs Gasai Yuno
Jeroen_Sol
Nothing reveals Humanity so well as the games it plays. A game of betrayal, where the most suspicious person is brutally murdered? How savage.
3885
Cthulhu is a 100 meter tall demon. Yuno is a human whose magical future diary only tells her what her stalkee is doing. Maybe Yuno would be able to slash at Cthulhu a few times before being completely obliterated, but even that I doubt.

Donald Trump vs. Bernie Sanders
Trump is a much bigger presence than Sanders and 5 years younger. Though I don't want to make a prediction on who'll win the election, Trump would certainly win a Deathmatch.

Charles Barkley vs. Shaquille O'Neal
oddRABBIT
I feel bored. How odd.
1979
(I don't know anything about these two, as I don't watch basketball, but...)

Charles Barkley trolls the enormous Shaquille, but Shaq responds with an army of police officers and children, and overpowers Barkley.

PHOENIX WRIGHT & MAKOTO NAEGI & HAJIME HINATA VS HAJIME KINDAICHI & CONAN EDOGAWA, AS WELL AS MILES EDGEWORTH.
Jeroen_Sol
Nothing reveals Humanity so well as the games it plays. A game of betrayal, where the most suspicious person is brutally murdered? How savage.
3885
Phoenix and Edgeworth are evenly matched, and will just end up shouting and pointing at each other for the whole fight.

That means it's the Dangan Ronpa characters vs the anime characters. I think Naegi and Hinata have this one, as they're probably desensitized to violence and despair through their encounters with Junko Enoshima, and Conan is stuck in a little kid's body.

Sheev Palpatine vs Tom Riddle
LockeZ
I'd really like to get rid of LockeZ. His play style is way too unpredictable. He's always like this too. If he ran a country, he'd just kill and imprison people at random until crime stopped.
5958
Is that Emperor Palpatine's cousin who works at the DMV? Oh no, apparently some failure of an author thought they needed to invent a first name for him.

Tom Riddle was defeated by a mother's love, which is a power that Palpatine abhors and will not touch. But Steve Palpatine was defeated by being stabbed and tossed into a pit, which is practically Tom Riddle's specialty. Voldemort wins.

MacGyver Stripped Naked and Drugged Wielding Nothing but a Used Q-Tip vs. The Borg
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