EpiQuest 2

Someone commented recently that the game had mediocre dialog. So I beefed it up. Here are the original lines, followed with their beefyness. It took 90 minutes to write it all and you know what... I'd probably shoot myself if I had to read all this in game. This is just the NPCs from the first town.

Use the jump attack to slay flying enemies such as fairies and cardinals.
In order to fight flying enemies such as fairies and cardinals, you will need to use your skills. Keep in mind that every enemy has a weakness, and with a "jump attack" skill, you can leap and strike your foes. In order to get the jump attack skill, you will need to equip a weapon like a sword, dagger, staff, axe and so on.

To get to Forgemane pond, cross the river and head north.
There's a rustic pond to the north. Folks call it Forgemane. It has tall grass and its secluded in a clump of trees. Beautiful place with clutterflies. The only danger there are gushers. The place is infested with them, but looking at your... youthful body, you should have no problem with them. They can gang up on you though, but again, I have a feeling with your figure that you won't be going there alone will you? Anyway dear, you can get there by crossing the river to the east and just follow the mountains.

You can find Wandscratch swamp to the west.
Over to the west about half a day's journey is a desolate place that I fear my son would be too stupid to know what's good for him and go there anyway. Its known as Wandscratch swamp. There's yucky purple water that bubbles and stinks. My mom told me stories of how she lost my older brother in that swamp. He was too stupid too. The men aren't the bright ones in my family. I am only telling you this so you can steer clear of it. As if the dead trees that surround it weren't enough warning, the place is crawling with wolves, orcs and dangerous plants. I'd say heed my warning.

Ineas village is to the north from Wandscratch swamp.
North of Wandscratch swamp is a small village in the forest. It is rustic with good people there. They are farmers for the most part and live off the land in their log cabins. One day I think I'd like to retire there, but in the meantime, my family needs money and there's more jobs here. Its a beautiful place there with a stream that runs through it.

Merchants will raise and lower their prices based on their mood, personality and who is in your party.
Merchants have particular moods, personalities, likes and dislikes. Such as a lady sales clerk may like cute and fuzzy animals, so she may hate the hunters that come in there wearing animal skins and smelling like death. The merchant at the local magic shop may scoff at a party with a barbarian in it. Other merchants are just in moods, some are greedy and looking to make a quick coin. What I am trying to tell you is that the merchants will raise and lower their prices based on their mood and who is in your party. Keep that in mind the next time you try to buy something and get price gouged or get an unexpected discount.

Welcome to \n \n.
Hello, I'm the town greeter and welcome to \n \n! Our bustling little town is a few generations old now and while its much quieter than the other towns in the kingdom, we are still the biggest. The weapons in our humble armory are built with lightweight material and are easy to carry. Who needs big fancy weapons and armor when you live in the grasslands of the Saranoa region of Sladaria? With these big walls, we are protected and safe. If you want to take in a drink, you should visit our local pub at the center of town, but if your more of a quiet soul, you can sit by our streaming river that rolls down the hills. The choice is yours. Soak it all in friend, because you're in \n \n!

There are more enemies that come out at night.
We're protected by these sturdy stone walls that my grand father helped put up himself. Outside the walls the wildlife isn't too fierce. There are gushers, cardinals, sword stings, fairies and snappers. All generally weak, but you should know the stronger wildlife comes out to hunt at night. I'm talking about howlers, squeakers and sleeks. They're all considerably more dangerous. I'm just warning you if you go out hunting.

If you are a known criminal, we will chase you down!
I'm one of the few guards needed to uphold the law here in town. Most threats actually come from within these walls. People get a little rowdy at the local pub and we need to break it up. Other times, we get traveling thieves that mistake our friendly nature for weakness. Do not fear though, the other guards and I chase down those criminals that steal and let that be a subtle warning to you if you were thinking about it yourself.

If you steal from homes, someone will notice when things go missing. The first person that will get blamed is you stranger.
We get quite a few travelers here in town. A lot of people come to escape the high stress life in the other regions of Sladaria. Many come from other lands thinking that it is safe to just burglarize houses with no one noticing something is missing. Well let me warn you that if something goes missing, the first person they blame is the new stranger in town. We are men of the people, we defend and serve them, so we work for them and if they think you're a thief, we will too.

If you are looking for potions or drinks, try the pub.
Most travelers are used to item shops selling all of the potions and drinks. Around here though, our pub is the one that sells the drinks. Sure you can buy some potions at other shops like the magery, but for the widest selection of drinks, try the pub. You might even like the wenches there. They've always served me quite well, maybe one day I will have the money to tip them more than a smile and a wink.

You can recruit members to your party by meeting people.
It is safer outside of these walls if you have a party. Not that it is all that dangerous, I adventured out there in my younger years to Wandscratch swamp. The truth is that wildlife hunts in packs and may tend to gang up on you if you are out there alone. You can recruit certain people to your party. Sure you can't recruit everyone you meet, but there are unique looking people here in town and elsewhere that would be eager to join you. They all have their reasons and don't expect anyone to tell you why they'd join you, just be happy that they did. Now get out of my house!

I saw the hunter leave town and head toward the east.
Just this morning, I saw a hunter leave town and head to the east. He only comes back to town to sell the pelts to the local pawn shop. The man always stinks of mud and squeaker blood. I try to keep my grand children away from him as well as my lusty daughter in law. My son would spin in his grave if he knew what she had become after his death. Her two boys aren't even his!

The inns are a good place to find party members.
Hey if you're looking for me to join your party, I'm sorry. I'm not much of a traveler. I've been to Forgemane pond with my husband for some fishing and um other activities, but that's it. If you really want someone to join your party, you should try the pub or inn. Chances are there are travelers passing through that would enjoy companionship. You can speak with the guild master at the pub.

The maximum members in your active party is 4, but you can have more members in your reserve!
Having a merry band of travelers is wonderful. In my youth, I traveled all across Sladaria with my wife and our friends only to end up settling down here in our retirement. You are only allowed a traveling party of four though, any more than four and the guards would get suspicious that you are amassing an army and the king wouldn't like that. The king is paranoid, but who could blame him with all the attempts on his life from assassins sent by his brother? While you can only have four members in your party, you can have reserve members waiting for you at the local pub. Just speak with the guild master!

The pubs are empty during the day, but crowded at night.
Excuse the mess please... but I don't get much cleaning done. Either does my mom. She's off during the day and I ... well I like to ponder the mysteries of life during the day. I'm far too busy to clean, besides that, its woman's work. If the pubs had some life in them in the daytime, I would hang out there, but the pub really only picks up at night. That's when I go there. If I went in the daytime, everyone would know I'm jobless. For now at least.

There was a barbarian that headed out to the west.
Wretched barbarian stomped through my flowerbed this morning! The hulking powerhouse insisted on climbing over the town's wall instead of leaving out the gate like a normal person! What's wrong with him! Through my flowers! Its like he did it on purpose! Well, he's probably off killing things as he cuts a trail of destruction to the west.

Avian enemies such as cardinals have a weakness to bows and arrows. You can take them out pretty easy.
I used to hunt to feed my family. I was excellent with a bow, but then I was attacked by a pack of hungry howlers. After that, my wife made me promise that I'd give up hunting. I'll tell you this though, avian enemies such as cardinals have a weakness to bow and arrows. You can take them out pretty easy, even if you need to keep buying arrows at the shops.

When you steal from homes it adds up and soon the guards will be after you.
If you are here to steal something from me, go ahead. Take it. I'm too old to stop you. Just know this though... when the guards find out that you're a thief and a burglar, they'll be after you. Soon you'll have every man in armor chasing you down when they see you. Then I'll have my pacifist revenge. Of course, when that happens, it will probably be the day that I die, seeing as the gods have never given me too much joy in life.

Orcs are very territorial and will chase you.
Orcs are hideous pig men that hunt and kill in swamps. I've seen a few of them in Wandscratch swamp. They can smell your blood and your scent is perfumed to them. They'll focus all attention from whatever wildlife they were about to slaughter and turn it toward you. They may hunt alone because they're anti social man beasts, but I have heard tales of warlords that amass orc armies to terrorize villages and nearby kingdoms.

Each enemy type in the overhead map has a different pattern.
Foes that you can see have different movement patterns. Weak and frail gushers tend to move away from anyone big enough to kill them. Carnivorous flowers will wander randomly and Orcs will charge toward you as fast as you can move. Beware of them.

You can just run around the creatures!
So I have noticed when traveling to Forgemane pond to fish. You can merely run around the creatures and totally avoid them! Sure there is the occasional wildlife that sneaks up on you looking for a snack, but if you keep moving they shouldn't be a problem. Unless of course you're a berserk barbarian that just wants to plow through them and kill them all. Or if you're stupid. I do not mean to offend, but you never can tell these days what motive people have.

Twice now a thief has robbed my shop at night!
Ah after a hard day of selling and dealing with people that want one hundred pieces of gold for a small blue potion, its good to just sit here and relax. I can't believe how much that woman wanted for that old broach she found in her dead mother's wardrobe. I bet she found it in her casket. I can only have one drink though... I need to go back to my shop and hide in the bushes, so I can figure out who has burglarized my shop. Twice now I've gone in the morning, unlocked the door and found things missing.