Very first thought: Jesus H. Christ I hate random encounters, especially with a rate this high. Zoe's healing does not seem worth using for its output. Weird that taunt only lasts one turn but I see how it's balanced. I've never had this thought before while playing any RPG, but I wish I had the option of a guard command.

Got my ass murdered by carnivorous plants the first go-round. Gonna take another shot ... and another try, too. : P

It's weird how the chest doesn't make a chest noise and also disappears. Took a look at my status screen. Holy small numbers Batman! Nice music.

Four game-overs in: having Zoe do anything but Taunt is a fucking death sentence, even once I had her hit level 4 and learn Haste and Fireball. I've been dragging Abe's corpse around since my first hellhound fight, where he got one-shotted, due to a lack of phoenix downs/phoenix down analogues. I would suggest that if there are no phoenix down analogues, that you just get game over if either party member dies. Because you're basically doomed.

This is #$%^&*@ hard but fuck it, I almost beat a Dark Souls once, I'll give it a few more tries.

...okay, a few more game overs in. Getting Abe into the cave alive is tricky. Chests reappear along with their contents a short while after they get opened, I presume this is a bug. But I totally took advantage of it to win the game.

Overall, Zoe is a megabeast (you all attack me and I reflect EVERYTHING is one hell of a one-move combo) and Abe is...kind of useless.

Interesting to climb up the level ladder in such a short time (was level 10 when I reached the dragon; those numbers didn't stay small too long). Finally found the Phoenix Down analogues, in the chest past the dragon. Doy. Pretty good use of warmups and cooldowns in combat, particularly warmups.

Okay, slew the Demon Dragon, beat the game. I feel like only during the final battle with the Demon Dragon (of course it's a Demon Dragon, of course it is) did I really feel like my party members feel like they were balanced (or, to be even more on the nose, in equilibrium), i.e. that Abe had something worthwhile to do with his turns and that Zoe could do something with some of her turns other than taunt. I assume the exploration of the theme of Equilibrium here is tied to the game's mechanics as there is not much of a story.

My initial approach was to run straight at the dragon three times, die three times, and declare the game impossible. The game really needs to communicate somehow that there are other things in the room to fight. Of course, Fomar did say it was in a terribly broken state. Thank goodness for mjshi's notes.

Where did these awesome animated battlers come from? They're grrrrreat!

I got done in by slimes a good half dozen times. Very frustrating.

Then I slew the dragon.

This soul-stealing metamorphosis meat shield thing is an AWESOME game mechanic. Someone should totally make a game using it. Obviously it could be expanded by giving the monsters you can harvest actual traits and skills (i.e. I expected maybe the Burny would go undamaged by the fire breath because it's made of fire, etc.). Other than that, it's not hard to beat at all, I love the look of the battle system and the monster collection aspect. Someone should make a story and maps to go along with it and you'd have one A+ game.

BTW, what engine was this even made in? Is this what RMMV games look like?

Oh man, I haven't played a 2k(3) game in a hundred forevers. Dat nostalgia, especially with some of the default musics. I'm expecting Don Miguel to jump out from behind a bush.

It's nice to see somebody bothered to put a real story in one of these motherfuckers, and the writing ain't bad. Gonna state the obvious complaint that the world seems to conceptually BE modern (machine gun fire, scientists) but looks like RTP medieval fantasy land. If there had been time to make this world look like how it's written, I would be all over this game like white on rice.

Alright, I'm ready, let's do this, let's KILL SOME FUCKING GODS.

Ugh, I had forgotten my primordial disgust at the look of 2k3 battlers.


Well uh...fuck you too!

Seriously, I am really digging how this game portrays a militantly atheistic regime with its writing.

No characters having ANY skills is making all these repeated combats really frickin' boring. It's a classic 2k3 era space-bar-mash-a-thon. (And as soon as I typed that I leveled up and learned my first skills. D'oh!)

I am pretty far up this mountain and I wish I had any practical way to spend the huge pile of um...T....I've accumulated without going all the way back to the worldmap (I appreciate the teleport Braziers but it's still a hike; also nice to see a game other than mine feature lighting things).

The skills...didn't turn out mattering all that much. I'm using autobattle on some of these fights. Less fights would be nice. This encounter rate is definitely verging on annoying.

The use of solid black AND a panorama backdrop in the gorge looks awkward and weird. One or the other I think.

I quit in frustration when two pieces of wood--one of them extracted from a very tough mother of an ent--was apparently not enough to build a bridge two tiles wide. I wanted to see how the story ended and how the God-slaying played out but the battles were just too frequent and too tedious for me to keep on keeping on.

I didn't really see any reflection of the assigned theme, Umbra, in my time with the game.

Oh man, RM2k!! What a fucking full-on nostalgia trip, mate!

As regards the OBVIOUS LIES with which the game opens, the proper term for a ninja waitress would be kunoichi, not shinobi /weaboooooooooo.

And after making a point of being a pedantic Japanophile, I see the word I was looking for, kunoichi, in the game's opening dialogues. Nice.

EDUCATIONAL ADVISEMENT: Everyone should play this game if they don't know why people are sometimes two snakes!!

Seriously, I found this pretty funny. Not like ROFLMAO, but I'm definitely sympatico with Healy's sense of humor. This was short, abundantly silly and fun. I got more lulz from my short time with Ninja Waitress than most full length comedy games I've tried, for what it's worth. This was a quick breath of fresh air after trying to force myself to finish Godslayers.

First thought: Piano, if you want to make an Evil Dead fangame, then just commit to it!

Marilyn's chainsaw should certainly not be unequippable ('Fix Equip' in VX Ace parlance).

Are those zombies all schoolchildren? That's a bit ... dark, all other things considered. Y'know, the nod nod wink wink Evil Dead references, the ridiculous dialect in the ranch house, and then... (un)dead children? There's a bit of tonal whiplash there.

The execution on the graphics for Marilyn's battler is nothing to write home about, but the effort is appreciated, as is the concept! Wouldn't mind seeing the credits for this one, as there are some resources I don't immediately recognize the source of.

The mapping is really pretty good!

After I disposed of all of the zombies I was heading back to 'report' when a zombie ran into me, battle animation #1 played, and the game froze. : (