GOURD'S QUEST II - FORUM ADVENTURE GAME!

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--- ::Endgame Quote:: ---
" One day... you may meet again."


OP:
Hiya guys, let's play another game of Gourd's Quest!

If you haven't played before, then basically what happens is I will write a little piece of a developing story and leave some choices at the end. I'll roll with the choice of the first person who picks an option. You guys will determine the story through choices, and I through writing based upon your choices.

Note: You are not limited to the suggested options. You can get creative too!

The OP will be important as it will contain important information for your choices. The OP is a Main Menu of sorts containing your Party, Inventory, and a section of the entire story thus far, creatively named Story Thus Far... The last part is the Option History, which keeps track of the options made throughout the story.

You can also check out how the last one went here.


Main Menu

~Party~
Gazpar Wiles the Child Clown Extraordinaire
Lorthos the Lovely Lock Picking Octopus
~Inventory~

:: Gazpar ::
Stylin' Purple, Red and Green Clown Costume
Heavy Metal Bar of Manliness 'n Stuff Tipped with Ornate Spearhead
U.F.O :: Underside Floating Obscurers

-Clown Backpack - 25 Panels Left - 6 Panels in Use

Friend's Impressive Art You Stole (1 Panel)
Clown's Wrath Megaphone ~Monaerie Values~ (1 Panel)
Dream World's Demonic Boomerang (1 Panel)
Ornate Diamond-lined Spare Pole (3 Panels)



:: Lorthos ::
Tough Purple Slimy Skin
Demeaning Rainbow Nurse Pet Hat

-Strongest Six Free Tentacles - 5 Panels Left - 1 Panel in Use
Melquior's Note:
"Hey...Gazpar. I know you and I are friends, but you must leave me here. The fate of the world depends on it. I know...cheesy, right? But, before you save yourself AND the world...I need to be just a little bit more cheesy. Gazpar...I love you.
L-Like, not in a gay way or anything, just..."
The note ends there.




The Whole Story
You just love the dramatic 'oohs' and 'aahs' that are instinctively drawn out of your adoring crowd as you perform daring and life-shortening tricks. Acting is really important too - you have to keep their emotions and entertainment constantly in your control the entire time unless you like not being paid. Though, for the first time, you've lost control and are dangling from a tight rope, and your arms are starting to hurt... The audience doesn't think anything of it - they believe you're just toying with them again. Your grasp is slippin one finger at a time. The brilliant colors of the tent's red and yellow interior walls and ceiling is messing with your adrenaline tainted vision. One more finger...
Ah, heck, there's no way you're not getting paid today! You take off your pants with one hand, (this invokes a few awkward giggles and gasps), and then let go of the tight rope, your specially made clown floatation underpants flap around as you fall. They just so happen to be the heart-pattern ones too. The pants aren't working as parachutes, but your underwear certainly is! Defying physics, you float down slowly and gently. Maybe a little too slowly as you are very exposed right about now. And, it is only made worse by the fact that you turn a deep shade of red at this. Once on the ground you put your large fluffy pants back on and bow. The clapping for your performance is marvelous, it being one of the best shows you've put on for a while. You scurry quite quickly out the tent, colliding face first into your boss's gut. Whoops!
"You need to be more careful out there, sport! I can't have you losing your head and falling."
McCarkle has always been very kind to you since the day he revealed he was your biological father. Not that you'd ever want to look like him though, as his face is very beaten up and crinkly at only the age of 30. And his walk reminds you of a shaved, defiled walrus in Hawaii.
"It was all a part of the act, McCarkle!"
"Yeah, right kid! If it was, then you were trying to delay school for yourself or sum'tin'. It ain't workin'. Now go to your friend's house and go to school. No more skippin', ya hear?"
"I do," you say passively as you dash away, grabbing your backpack and running off, waving goodbye as you leave. Now it's time you to decide where to go!

You wonder which friend he was talking about. Oh, he meant Melquior! Ah, yes, Melquior! He's been your best friend since you were little and is still a good friend to this day. He began hanging out with you ever since you saved his life from a bunch rampaging crocodiles. You feel like he's been trying to make it up to you despite you telling him it was no big deal. He was very persistent. Speaking of Melquior, you're walking up to his brightly painted house right now! You knock your secret knock that indicates something urgent, giggiling the whole time. Not 5 seconds pass by before he bursts out the door, wearing little more than his underpants yelling his head off. You notice he still has his toothbrush in his mouth.
"What'swrongGazparohmigod?!"
You starting laughing really hard and even harder when he makes an awkward astonished face when he realizes nothing's wrong.
"Not cool dude!" he says annoyed, dashing back into his house. You allow one more immature giggle, then invite yourself in, opting to wait in Melquior's room upstairs. Melquior's done with his morning routine in a flash and comes stomping upstairs excitedly. He grabs his gym bag up, clearly ready to go, but decides he should tell you something first.
"Hey, did you know that big dude is getting off probation today? And that he's actually going to come to school today? I remember he was the one who let out those vicious aligators."
"I'm not a afraid of any bully. Besides, the more pressing problem is you were wrong: they were crocodiles not alligators."
"Whatever. You don't think about what they are when they're trying to steal your creations."
"Ooookay. Let's just go, okay?"
"Okay."
Melquior is a little bit of a goody two-shoes, but you think he's alright. It's going to be hard skipping school with him in tow. You'd have to ditch him if you decided to go elsewhere, which honestly, isn't your preference.
You'd rather not ditch your friend, and if bad things happen, having him with you would be nice.
"Okay, let's go!"
"Mhm!"
You both depart from the brightly colored house and walk down the street slowly and talk about various things as you usually do. Close to your school something wicked approaches! The large kid, who could barely be called a kid anymore, at the age 21. He's handsome - you'll give him that. But his brain is virtually nonexistent.
"Ahhh! Here, he comes, Gazpar!"
Melquior hides behind you, attracting the bully with his fear, and his yelling.
"Stop yelling! He's like a shark, ya know?"
"Who's like a shark?!" you hear screamed in your ear, along with a bunch of saliva. You feel yourself lifted from the ground and being yelled at about something along the lines of 'Oh look, you're a clown, I'm going to pick on you.'
You put on your most annoyed face and say:
"You're stupid." But his reactions certainly aren't slow as immediately after you comment on his grey matter, he comments on your face with his fist.
"Hurhurhghe!" he laughs slightly in a slightly retarded way.
"Ow..."
You try to squeak out more but your face muscles don't seem to work at the moment. Melquior takes the hint though, and knocks out the big lug with his frying pan, after which he runs away towards the school.
"Thanks!" you yell towards him. You kick the big jerk and follow Melquior inside the school.

...

About halfway through the day, while chewing on your pencil, you look out the door window and see a monster of some kind attack a girl.
"Ahh!"
"What is the problem, Mr. Wiles?"
You ignore the teacher and storm out the door to help the girl. When outside, you see a monster attacking the girl's face. Upon seeing this you get in a stance. Melquior runs out and jumps into a stance as well.
"Zombies aren't as scary as bullies!" he yells out.
He's ready, but are you?
You back up way behind Melquior, and he charges and attacks the monster with his fryin' pan, weakening it. You then charge into it full force, knocking both the monster and the girl down - you fall down close to the monster. In his scramble to finish off the monster before it escapes, Melquior accidentally hits you with the frying pan, leaving the monster enough time to bite your hand and run away. A large bleeding mark is left on your hand.
"Yeowch!"
"Sorry, sorry!"
"It's okay, but that thing bit me."
"Oh no!!!"
"W-what?"
"Haven't you ever seen a zombie movie? You're infected now!"
"Uh, grow up. that was not a zombie."
Melquior can't seem to decide if he's sad that you disagree, or happy that you aren't turning into a zombie any time soon.
"Anyway, I'm going to go get it! You coming, Gazpar?"
He runs off, but you opt to check on the girl. She's sitting up now, looking at you with her mouth slightly ajar.
"Are you okay?"
"Yeah, I'll be fine."
You sigh contentedly and offer to help her up - she happily takes your hand.
"Mr.Wiles! What is the meaning of this?"
You look back and see the teacher looking at you with piercing eyes. The kids behing her snickering at you, laughing almost in a...sinister way.
"There was a monster attacking her!" you point to the girl.
She immediately cries out in dissent.
"Liar! I was just walking down the hallway and you ran into me!"
"Huh?"
"Well, Mr. Wiles?"
When you try to show her the bite mark on your hand, she acts as if nothing is there.
"I don't see it, young man."
"It's right there!"
"If you're going to lie, at least make it believeable! Now, off to detention with you and the girl!"
The girl yells out again.
"What? No fair!"
"Please, little lady, you were obviously truant."
She complains, but you sigh loudly and drag her to detention with you. On the way you spot the girl of your dreams in a classroom. Her hair is beautifully long and golden, her attire always conservative while being liberal in all the right places. She's a little older than you, but you're attracted nonetheless. She's never even talked to you before, but she waves to you for some reason. the girl you're draggin gets sick of your staring and starts dragging you to detention. Once there you're both told to sit down and not speak, which you happily don't comply by.
"Hey! Girl! Yeah, you!"
"What do you want, you maniac?"
"What gives? I saved you!"
"Whatever. Crazy."
"Ugh, can I at least know your name?"
"Samantha. Now shut up before we get more detention, I have a job to attend to, clown boy."
You ignore her insult and look around the room. It's pretty bland, and you're the only two in here not counting the 'warden' of sorts who isn't even awake anymore. Something is seriously wrong with the school, you need to get out of here. Maybe Samatha could help? You should probably hurry up too, for some reason you feel this sleepy feeling is a little more than not enough sleep.
You decide you're going to have to sneak out of here. It should be easy considering the warden is asleep.
"See ya, Samantha. I'm out of here!"
"What? Hey, that's juvenile!"
"I don't care. Something weird is going on here and I'm going to figure out what."
"And I'm just going to let you leave?"
"Come with me then."
Samantha mulls it over a little bit and makes an angry face.
"Fine."
"Great, but stop sighing so loudly."
Samantha gets ut of her chair followed by you. She starts tippy toeing and makes it all the way to the door before you begin. She gives you a thumbs up sign and a warm smile after a quick look at the Warden. You start to tip-toe...but your big clown shoes are mde of squeaky rubber. It doesn't seem to bother the warden so you just continue on. You're almost there when Samantha smiles in a sinister way shushes you loudly, waking up the warden as she leaves the room.
"W-what? What's going on? Get in your seat right now, young man!"
"Oooh, I'll get your for that Samantha!"
"Stop blabbering and sit!"
You obediently sit down. After a few minutes you look out the window and see Samantha sticking her tongue out at you. By now the warden was asleep again, but she bangs on the window, causing him to wake up again and yell at you to quiet down.
"Ughhhh!"
A few minutes later, Melquior comes in and sits down.
"You okay, buddy? I didn't mean to ditch you or anything."
"I'd be better if I wasn't here."
"Here, I'll whip up something to put him to sleep for good."
"You're going to kill him?!"
"Nooo, I'm just going to put him in a coma. He'll wake up. Eventually."
You let out a laugh and Melquior winks then goes to work. He whips up a nice radish soup instilled with some saliva from that monster. You watch as he takes it up to the warden and tells him to taste test it. The warden obeys and is knocked out almost instantly.
"It kind of makes me worry that some of that stuff is in your blood, Gazpar."
"I'll be fine. Come on, we have to help the school."
"Help it with what? I already took out the monster."
"No, something weird is going on."
"What?"
"You saw how they didn't see my mark. They were faking."
"You're right. But, what are we going to do about it?"
"Um...I hadn't thought about that."
You think about it. Perhaps you should chase after Samantha. Or maybe alert the principal. Maybe you should wait for the saliva to affect you. If you get hurt, you may want to admit your love to Ralsabeth before it's too late. The bully Nigel never actually goes in the school either and hangs out in front of the only exit all day. Chasing Samatha may not be so easy. And admitting your love to Ralsabeth may inflict Nigel's rage onto you as he's recently broken up with her. The principal may be affected too and you'd rather not know what the saliva is going to do to you.
"Well, Gazpar? I'd think we may want to regroup at your house. Maybe get some help from your clown friends."
"Let's go to my house and get some back-up."
"Okay, beatcha there!"
The two of you race down the main hallway of the school and outside. Melquior won, but that's fine.
You were lucky - Nigel wasn't out here.
Melquior asks a question.
"What if they don't believe us?"
"Melquior. Clowns don't joke around, and they don't expect others to either."
You then proceed to run home, leaVing him in your dust with a "Wut." face on. He realizes you're joking then quickly catches up, laughing at himself. You make it there in record time: 15 minutes. McCarkle is dealing with a midget outside his tent. Once he finishes, you run up to him and gasp something out too quickly because you used up all your air running.
"Eh? Slow down, I can barely 'ere ya."
"I said I need your help."
"What with?"
"There are monsters in our school and everyone's acting weird!"
"What? Did ya hit your head er sum'tin', boy?"
Melquior pipes up.
"No, it's true! We can prove it - look at Gazpar's arm!"
You show him the oddly shaped bite mark on your arm.
"My, you weren't lyin'!"
"Yeah, so we need your help for back-up in case we can't handle it."
Melquior pipes up again.
"Yeah! Cause no one messes with clowns!"
McCarkle chuckles at this and nods.
"Woo! Thanks a lot!"
You watch as McCarkle walks into his tent and comes out with a megaphone. Then, he shimmies up the nearest pole and yells into it.
"ALL CLOWNS REPORT TO THE MAIN TENT!"
The three of you then shuffle into the tent, while wadinf through the countless clowns filing in. The three of you take position in the middle of the tent and McCarkle yells into the megaphone again.
"OKAY ALL, WE'RE GONNA HELP OUT LIL' GAZZY HERE! HE'S HAVING SOME TROUBLES IN SCHOOL AND WE'LL BE NEARBY FOR MORAL SUPPORT - AND BACK-UP IF NEEDED!"
You can't help but beam as your clown friends and family applaud at this idea then all stand up ready to follow you the ends of the Earth. Clown family is forever.
"Okay," you say "let's go back to the school!"
They applaud again then flock to their mini, purple cars outside. You, Melquior, and McCarkle ride in an even smaller one with a flame decal.
Melquior obviously had never seen anything so cool as he said:
"Cool! I'm getting in first!"
After Melquior has troubles getting in, he doesn't like it as much. You shove him in, then get in with easy. McCarkle hops in and drives. Everything is going fines until Melquior decides he likes the car again and attempts to drive it, throwing you all into the school wall.
"Sorry...!"
"Shut it."
Melquior extracts you from the car after he and McCarkle get out. You're starting to feel tired again.
"Are you okay, Gazpar?!"
"I'm fine, Melquior. Well, it's not your fault at least. Let's hurry up though, okay?"
"Okay!"
McCarkle states he'll have the clowns camp out here on the side of the building. He also gives you the megaphone.
"Just scream 'Sherrrriiiii' into it when you need us, okay?"
Now it's time to decide what's next on the list.
You figure if dealing with whatever is happening is going to kill you, Ralsabeth should know. It might be a little awkward doing this in front of Melquior though.
"Um, Melquior?"
"Yeah, Gazpar?"
"How about you wait with the clowns?"
"What?! Why?"
"Well, we need a competent general for our army don't we?"
Melquior smiles at this and jumps and down excitedly.
"Okay! I can do it real good, Gazpar! Hurry up and use the megaphone soon, okay?"
"I will, no worries."
"See ya later!"
You turn your back to your friends and enter the school. It feels a lot different now. There are parts of the wall coming off where bits of purple splats can be seen. You'd rather not think about whatever it is. You walk down the hall briskly, feeling very lonely and insignificant without Melquior with you. You quickly find Ralsabeth walking down the hallway with Samantha. Ooh, this would be the perfect time to get even with her. You contemplate changing your plan, but Samantha flees upon seeing you, leaving Ralsabeth looking dumbfounded. You take in a deep breath and approach her.
"Huh? Hello, Gazpar is it?"
"Yeah... it's nice to meet you."
"Likewises, I saw you playing hookie earlier."
She lets out the cutest laugh you've ever heard.
"Haha...yeah I saw you not playing hooky. Uh, I actually came to admit something."
"Yes?"
"Well, I actually kind of sort of..."
"Go on?"
"Like you."
"Well, you're pretty darn interesting yourself with your clown suit you wear daily."
"No...I mean I really like you. Like LOVE."
You can feel your cheeks burning as realization dawns upon her face.
"Look... this is really cute, but you're a little too young for me don't you think? I'm not saying we can't be friends, but anything beyond that would be weird - especially so considering this is the first time we've ever spoken."
"Yeah..."
You hang your head in mixed emotion.
"Don't feel so bad, okay? Maybe you'll have a chance with a prettier girl than me."
You doubt it.
"Yeah..."
Ugh, you feel so broken. You walk away down the hallway, still looking at the ground.
"See you later, Gazpar...!"
You push aside the front door and hit your head on a wall.
"Owww...why me?!"
"Because you're useless."
You look up into the mischievious gleaming eyes of Nigel and two of his pals. In your weakened mental state, you almost believe his incredibly weak insult.
"Yeah..."
"Oh, glad we see eye to eye, Clown boy."
Nigel's friends laugh hysterically. Nigel snaps at them.
"Shut up, idiots!"
They quiet down right away.
"So, I heard you have the hots for my girlfriend."
"What?!"
How could he have possibly heard that - it just happened!
"I can see by how wide your mouth is that it's true. See, a little birdy told me..."
You see Samantha disappear around a nearby corner. She must have known what you were approaching Ralsabeth for.
"So, I figured I'd help you."
"What?"
He picks you up by your collar - you're in no state to fight back as he mercilessly pounding in your face. He throws you to the ground. The earlier sensation of not being able to speak is present again. Nigel's reinds kick your sides in. You think your sides are broken, but you can't be sure because you can't really feel much of anything. The sleepy feeling you've had all day is coming into the forefront of your mind right now. then, it is quickly shoved to the side as you hear Nigel speak again.
"Hahaha! You don't have your stupid chef friend here to help you anymore do you?"
You couldn't care less, you'd rather take a nap. But then you hear another voice.
"Oh, yes he does!"
You hear a frying ban reverb off Nigel's head again. You'd like to see who's saving you but your eyes feel glued shut. Whatever, you can tell it's Melquior, I mean who else would save such a mess as you? You feel really tired now.
"G...azpar?! A...you...okay?! Gaz...r!!!"
Mmm...nice little nappy...
You wake up in a very bright place, with oddly colored dirt everywhere - blue! You get up and look around. To the north you see a relatively humanoid female figure. She appears to be naked and completely white with no eyes or mouth to speak of. To the east are a bunch of plateaus of varying height. To the south is another humanoid figure - this one looks like Samantha. Just...smiling at you evilly. To the west is where the light is coming from. People say never walk into the light, so you'd rather not go there. You decide, considering Samantha has been ruining your already horrible day left and right, it'd only be fair if you kicked her teeth in. You walk towards Samantha and her slightly creepy face. Sheesh, this blue dirt is really sticky. You've been here five minutes MAYBE, and there's already wads and wads of it stuck in your shoes.
"Okay, Samantha. I'm sick of your crap. What's your deal?"
"My deal? You're only the single most insignificant thing I've seen on this planet."
"Yeah, yeah, yeah. Whatever."
You take out your pole and smile - you're going to enjoy this. Samantha poises herself. You jump up and while spinning in the air, fling your pole at Samantha. She can hardly bear this.
"H-how can you be this strong? I thought my mother broke you-!"
"I'd say hallucinating an alternate world is as broken as a person can get. I guess it's a perspective thing. Anyway-" you retrieve you pole and hold it over your head again. Samatha cowers back a little.
You slam down hard on her again with your pole and she looks as if she's glwoing form her wounds.
"-this is fun!"
You kick her in her side and she almost completely snaps in half. Her body can barely be seen amidst the light. You sigh and kick her other side, throwing her towards the plateaus. She screams loudly as she dissolves away into nothing but tiny pieces that fly away in the wind.
"If only I had this kind of strength for real."
You sigh again then realize Samantha left something behind.
It's a boomerang with a circled asterisk-type symbol printed on it in red. You pick it up and put it in your backpack."Why am I bothering looking for stuff? Why am I talking to myself?"
Pffft, you do whatever you want. You jump up the the plateaus one by one. There appears to be less gravity here so hopping up them is very easy for you. It's really fun too. Just as you had anticipated, you spot some treasure. An entire chest is ahead of you guarded by two large feral lions. No problem. The left one pounces you, but you have your pole out by now and you easily parry it. You send it flying - unexpectedly far. It is sent careening off the edge of the dreamy world. While you were watching this, the right cat had picked the lock on the chest and used its contents on you - it was an expertly carven obsidian spear! Yeowch! You're speared right to the ground. You throw your pole and you hit! The other cat is knocked out. You wiggle off the spear and look at it. It really is nice, but you like your pole better. You rip the ornate tip off of the spear and attach it to your pole using some blue dirt. Cool! You put your extra pole in your bag. Now that you have your upgraded pole, you pole vault to the next plateau holding the 'zombie' from earlier.
"Don't you think I forgot about that bite you gave me earlier!"
You run at the thing, it looking very distinctly frightened. When you get close enough, you plant your pole in the ground and use your remaining velocity to spin up the pole and kick the zombie off the side of the dream world. A bottle of zombie spittle comes flying back up into your hands. Melquior would like this. You put it in your bag and snatch up a particularly pretty flower to also stash. You think that's everything here. You walk to the North. Huh. It's like a statue. You poke it. The woman in the north, seemingly frozen in time until now, stretches whilst flying slightly above the ground.
"Ahhhh, child. How long was I asleep?"
"Huh? I have no idea."
"Of course you do."
"Uh, no. Hey, you're kind of freaking me out, lady."
You turn around to walk away.
"How dare you walk away from the one who gave you life?! Insolent child."
"Huh?" you turn around "you're...god?"
"Did I say I was?"
"Yes."
"Incorrect."
You're really confused now.
"What are you?"
"Well, I'm a god. I breath the life. Gaia creaes the vessel. Everything you are is thanks to me. And much like breathing, things live as I breath out, and die as I breath in."
"So...did I die?"
"No, but you should have. Your friend cheated you. He bound you to the Earth while you were crossing to live with I. You are in a purgatory of sorts. He was a msitake anyway."
Mistake? Melquior has saved you countless times - he's no mistake!
"What?! Don't talk bad about my friend!"
You're having trouble hiding your emotions here.
"Do not tempt me, child, I will destroy you if you show too much disrest."
Who does this lady think she is? Without thinking, you swing your bar at her. You hear melodic, evil laughing and you fall down. Yeowch, you can feel being beaten up all over again. Your head hurts...


"Your mind is no longer your own."
*Launch Melqiuor Perspective*

You have to pause to rest again. Gazpar really weighs quite a bit, or maybe you're just weak. It is midnight now and you're dragging Gazpar home. The moon is hanging heavily upon the sky as you slowly move Gazpar to your house. The clowns all agreed that your house was Gazpar's best shot at a recovery.
"I'm going to help you okay? You're going to be fine."
Your eyes are still a little red from when you thought he was dead. It took all the strength you could muster to not murder the bullies while they were lying face-down, knocked out cold on the ground.
"...Think you a...?"
You almost drop him in surprise when he speaks.
"G-Gazpar? Are you okay? Oh my god, I'm so happy you're alive."
"Yes? Mel...?"
"Yeah! You're okay."
You are very ecstatic when you realize he's fine.
"How did...? Erf."
He's not exactly 'with it' though.
"You have Ralsabeth to thank for you living, Gazpar. She had Equilibrium Stabilizers in her purse - her mother takes them daily apparently.
"Thank you..."
"Thank her not me. "
"You saved me..."
"Well, yeah, I guess"
"And you're breaking your back moving me...I'm useless..."
"Don't say that! You've saved me plenty of times! Remember the alligators?"
"Hehehe. Crocodiles..."
You both laugh. Gazpar seems to be feeling better already. You begin to cry again, because you're so happy.
"Don't cry...I'm fine."
"What if they come at you again when I'm not with you?"
"Heh...I'm not afraid of any fucking bully."
His language is vulgar but his words ring true. You arive at your house shortly. Throughout the night, you tend to Gazpar with the immune stabiliers you were gifted. He tells you of his dream and shwos you the things he brought back. You both rationalize it must have been real. The next morning, Gazpar is rarin' to go. He's no longer injured save for a limp.
"Okay, Melquior! Let's get to the bottom of what's happening today! I figure that naked chick was behind this. The only way we're going to end this is to end her! We only have to figure out how to get back to that realm. "
"Well, you got there by having the snot beat out of you. How about we try NOT to do that and find another way?"
"Fair enough. Any ideas"
You think about it and come up with one.
"Gazpar, let me see your shoes."
"Huh, why?"
"Just do it!"
He shows his giant clown shoe to you and you find exactly what you were looking for.
"There! That blue dirt!"
"Huh?"
You rip it off of his shoe and feel it. You've always had a natural sense...when you feel something, the perfect recipe appears in your head.
"Yesss."
"What are you doing, Melquior?"
"I know exactly what to do. We need a dragon fang, orphan tears, zombie spittle, a brew of a Loransiun Georinia and chocolate, and the final ingredient..."
"Yes?"
"The final ingredient...is a hero's ashes."
"Well, that's great. So, if we find all these we accomplish...?"
"We'll have access to the purgatory. I can feel it."
"If you say so... Where are we going to find these, anyway?"
"Easy. The Adieu Orphanage and the Brewers' Lair. We can find all those things there. Also, we'll need a big space."
"How about the football field?"
"Perfect. We'll make this and gather the clowns at the football field."

...

The Adieu Orphanage is a very happy place. It's very peceful and serene. It was also built upon a hero named "Emily Adieu" There's even a statue of her there. It's very well kept however so obtaining the ingredients you need will be a task.
"Let's do this, Melquior! Pick our entrance plan and let's go!"
You had always wanted to see this statue in person - it's somehow even more heroic up close than you had expected. It depicts a beautiful girl with long golden hair. By the look of it, is made of smooth, colored marble. Below the statue is a plaque that reads: "Say adieu to your Past, and hello to your new Present - the Future."
You've always thought it very poetic, but you wonder now if there's a little more to it. 
"Hey, Gazpar?"
"Yeah?"
Gazpar leaves the shoe heel he was inspecting and comes to the front of the statue.
"What do you make of this?"
You watch as he reads it.
"It's some dumb poem I guess."
"Come on, think harder. If I can find something weird with it you definitely can."
Gazpar shoots you an annoyed look and looks again.
"Well...it's kind of weird how 'Past', 'Present', and 'Future' are capitalized."
Oh! You were looking at a smudge. Leave it to Gazpar... You'll just take credit for this discovery anyway.
"Yes, exactly!"
There's an awkward silence. 
"...And?"
"...I have no idea. How about we look around more?"
You prod at the capitalized letters as you walk away. They glow at your touch.
The f comes off in your hand.
You can't help but gravitate back to the statue.
"Uh, we already looked here, Melquior."
"Well, I can't help but feel the answer is here somewhere..."
"Whatever you say..."
Gazpar goes to check out the back of the statue but you stop him.
"I'll inspect the back this time."
"No, no it's okay."
"Come on, please?"
Gazpar looks quite mad at you - probably for insinuating he can't look for clues correctly. You walk to the back of the statue and immediately see peeling paint. You scratch at it and see a space to place a letter shaped like an 'f'.
You place the "F" in it and suddenly feel your stomach churn. The ground shakes violently as the statue move to the side and reveals a conspicuous staircase.
"I did it! I did it!" you jump up and down excitedly.
"Er...let's go get our ingredients now."
Gazpar leads the way down the dark staircase and then the hallway. He finds an opening at the end and goes through without a second thought. You follow and find yourself in a cozy room with a fluffy rainbow carpet, several large wardrobes, two doors - one to the north and one to the east, a fish tank with an octopus in it, a desk with several important-looking papers on it and you can hear footsteps coming from behind the east door.
"Melquior, you have to hide!"
Gazpar jumps into one of the large wardrobes. You catch a glimpse of rainbow-colored nurse suits. How odd. Either way, you have to decide where to hide quickly!
You dash quickly to the desk and hide under it just in time. A woman in a rainbow nurse outfit comes in. She's holding a tranquilizer and the sight of it makes you pray she doesn't find you. Luckily, she's not come in here for anything in her desk but rather to obtain something from her wardrobe... the one Gazpar is in.
"Ah! What are you doing in here?!"
She whips Gazpar out of the wardrobe and across the room. You can't help but well up inside and you can't stand it. You're too scared to object though. Gazpar stands up though, ready. 
"I SAID: What are you doing in here?"
She raises her tranquilizer gun to him and grunts. 
"I'm here to get a few things..."
"You've come to steal our stuff? Nobody steals from me."
You take it she doesn't directly deal with the orphans considering how quick she was to whip a child across the room and point a tranquilizer gun at him.
She shoots. Gazpar rips it out unphased. 
"W-what?"
"I'm not afraid of you."
Gazpar rears up and jumps to the woman, whacking her hard with the pole once. She falls down but isn't out. The woman stands up and rushes Gazpar into the wall. Gazpar is definitely hurt now. He looks to be knocked out. She turns around and begins to walk to the phone on her desk but Gazpar wakes up and hit her with his pole from behind. Not expecting it, she takes a direct hit to the and passes out.
You crawl out from underneath the desk.
"You did it, Gazpar! Good job!"
"Right. We should be able to look around now."
While Gazpar keeps lookout to make sure no one else comes, you check out the desk. On it are many papers that look important. They include many names of, presumably, orphans. You take note of a paper with a red star on it. It says "Emily Bondile". Interesting. It seems that the hero's friend, Adam, named his child after his friend. You check the drawers next. The first drawer contains a brass key and some tranquilizer darts. You pocket the key just in case. On the other side of the desk in the second drawer are various reports regarding your school. Why would an orphanage be spying on your school? You look at the rainbow nurse and shiver. Creepy. You close it and take a look under the desk again. The carpet's a little ripped. You rip it up and find a switch. You switch it and the earth rumbles again.
"Melquior, what are you doing back there?!"
"N-nothing!"
The shaking stops and upon looking out a nearby window, you see the statue has moved back into place.
"Hey, about handing the investigation over to me, buddy?"
Honestly, after the statue incident where he couldn't even see peeling paint, you're not sure it's such a good idea.
"Gazpar, you're doing such a great job guarding that door! I don't think I could keep watch that well! Besides, I'd rather any other rabid rainbow nurses eat you rather than me."
"Gee, thanks a lot."
Speaking of rabid nurses of rainbows, you decide to inspect the nurse as...questionable as that may sound. You check her large pocket and discover some tranquilizer dart reloads. This makes you realize you should take her tranquilizer gun from her. Your mother always told you not to steal but never specified if stealing tranquilizer guns from nurses who attacked your friend was alright... You figure it is and obtain both the reloads and the gun. While thinking of the next place to search you hear Gazpar's voice.
"Are you going to check the hat or not?"
It hadn't occurred to you to check there. You run your hand over it and feel something sharp... Hey, it's the dragon tooth you needed!
"See, what'd I tell ya?"
You ignore him and carry on with your investigation. In her back pocket is a highly explosive Monasi Ball. You're taking that with you for sure.
"Hey, hurry up with the search Sherlock Holmes, there's this guy talking about getting something from here after he deals with orphan problems."
The dragon tooth is a little too big for your bag so you allow Gazpar to carry it for now. "I'm almost done, don't worry."
You continue your search at the octopus tank. It's really gross-looking but you rationalize sticking your hand in, because you know that your school needs you. Inside feels as disgusting as it looks.
"YUUUUCK!"
"Ahh, what?"
"...I think it licked me."
"Octopuses don't lick people."
"They do if you have your hand in their mouth."
"What?!" Gazpar turns around and sees the octopus has latched onto your hand.
"Why the heck did you stick your hand in there?!"
"I was curious."
Gazpar face palms and directs you to lift your hand out so he can search the inside of it octopus free. You obey, and as Gazpar predicted, it's still attached to you. Now that you look at the purple thing closely, you believe it's a female. Gazpar plunges his hand into the aquarium and finds a string on the bottom. Upon pulling it, a compartment underneath the creature's home opens up revealing ashes and an urn.
"Hey, do you think those are Emily's ashes, Melquior?"
The octopus makes a loud sucking sound in approval.
"This little guy certainly seems to think so. you're going to have to carry it though, I have no more room."
The octopus makes more sucking sounds, as if trying to communicate.
"I think he wants to hold it, Melquior."
"Er, that's probably a bad idea. I mean, he's not even coming with us."
It bites you.
"Okayokayokay, it can come." It makes more sucking approval sounds and grabs the ash filled urn with a spare tentacle, crawls to the bag on your side, and roots itself to the side of your bag.
"Hey, why do you get the octopus?"
"If you want him, take him."
The octopus slaps you on your butt with a tentacle.
"Yeowch! Nevermind, he wants to ride with me."
"Fine, but do you hear the footsteps?"
Someone's coming! The both of you scramble to the North door and attempt to open it. It's locked! You try your key but it doesn't work here.
"Oh no..."
When you both give up, your new tentacled friend reaches over to the door lock with a spare tentacle and picks the lock. The three of you immediately rush in. On the other side, you pat your new friend.
"Thank you, it means a lot."
The octopus clearly approves. You find your self in a large, light-blue room with waterfalls everywhere. In the middle is a display case featuring a bottle with some kind of a liquid. The octopus is pointing to it with a tentacle - he also almost made you fall with the shift in weight.
"Do you think these are orphan tears, Gazpar?"
"Why would they have a bottle of orphan tears in here?"
"Well...they may have gone a little cuckoo at the loss of their friends. Besides, How'd you think we were going get orphan tears, Gazpar?"
"I figured we were going to punch an orphan in the face or something."
"You're horrible..."
Gazpar shrugs and walks to the casing and gives it a nice bang with his spare pole. This results in flashing red lights, the activation of a large fan, and many holes in the floor opening up. Gazpar is sent flying around the room. You'd join him if your octopus wasn't holding you to the floor. Time to figure this out.
Thinking fast, you sling your octopus who you've named "Lorthos" over your head and prepare a radish stew that will make you heavier. You drink it all, sling the octopus back onto your bag and begin to leap across the large holes in the floor. It's hard to jump, but thankfully you make it just fine with no more than one scare near the end. You strike the glass as hard as you can with your frying pan and obtain your orphan tears. But there's no way to stop the wind and get Gazpar back down here...
"Me-e-e-lqui-o-o-or?"
You can't help but giggle at him trying to talk. You try to climb the wall using Lorthos' tentacles, but she's not exactly comfortable carrying you with her. Around the time you think about giving up, an admittedly handsome man with short jet-black hair, well-built athletic body, and some slight stubble enters the room. By the...unmanly(?) aura he gives off, you believe this must be the hero's friend, Adam Bondile. He's been your role model your entire life, but now he's your enemy. He doesn't look particularly happy, and his muscle weight keeps him on the ground. 
"Who are you?! What are you doing in this room? Get out?"
"I-I?!"
He's coming closer and you're suddenly gripped with fear - you can't hurt him, he's your hero! 
"Melquior! Man up, sheesh!" Gazpar yells from the skies, strangely clear. He's right but...you still can't move. Adam goes to grip you by the neck, but Lorthos intercepts! The lovely octopus attachs to his face, blinding him and giving you enough time to go around the back of Adam, cook up a deliciously deadly radish dish and give it to Lorthos to force feed him. When Adam passes out, the air stops and Gazpar plops onto the floor, injuring his butt.
"Ow..." You're ecstatic!
"I did it! I did it! I got the tears and beat Adam!"
You suddenly feel your butt assaulted. 
"Oh, with Lorthoses help too of course!" You give her a slimy hug and place her back on your backpack.
"So are we done here?"
"I guess so, but where are we going to find chocolate?"
"Um, in a store?"
"Chocolate was banned years ago, Gazpar..."
Why would Gazpar forget about the chocolate ban? How odd...
"Er, well! I suppose it doesn't matter! Adam here has some chocolate!"
"Why would a hero have something illegal on him?"
"Why would a hero try to choke you out?"
...He has a point. Sort of, you were trespassing though.
"Why don't I carry it, Melquior?"
"I think I'd rather this be with Lorthos and I."
You give Lorthos the chocolate and she swoons affectionately. You make sure to be clear she's not to eat it.
"And, actually...I think I want the other ingredients too."
"Huh, why?"
"You'll see why."
He grumbles under his breath, in a rather dangerous tone, but hands you the ingredients anyway.
"Okay, let's get out of here!"
The two of you scurry to, and out, the secret passageway. After moving the statue again, of course. Outside, there are row upon row of multicolored clown cars. You both hop in the one that you rode in before, driven by none other than McCarckle.
"'Kay, where to now, gentl'men?"
Gazpar responds quickly, as if in a rush:
"The Brewers' Lair!"
"Th' Breuwers' Liar it es!"
Before you know it, you're in the Brewers' Lair. And, for once, it goes off without a hitch, and you're in and out. With the brew, you head to the school, and get out, along with many clowns, on the sidewalk. You see Nigel, and wave at him confidently with a smirk on your face. He falters slightly, and storms off somewhere. When looking to see Gazpar's reaction, he seems distant and uncaring.
"Are you...okay? Gazpar?"
"Hm? Yeah, sure. I guess I'm just a little nervous to be going back."
"Yeah, I guess I could see that."
Yeah, that answer was bullcrap. You can tell. You're all in the football field now - every clown is accounted for - and you set out the ingredients, sitting down by them. You carefully mix the ingredients - a true chef's touch! Huh? Wait, where are Emily's remains? You look to Gazpar and see him stomping the ashes into the dirt! No time is wasted as you fling yourself at him, frying pan in hand.
"I knew it!"
"You little..!" Gazpar gasps out as you hit him.
"I hope...I hope I didn't hit him too hard."
"Ahm' su'r he es fine, Melly." McCarckle offers.
You gather what you can of the ashes and put them in your concoction. Wait, where's your frying pan? You open up the portal quickly.
"Melquior! Watch ou'!"
*FOOM*

You were just in time.
Gazpar Perspective LAUNCH!
You wake up again in the same place. The blue, sticky earth is here and everything. One thing however is missing: Melquior! You can remember trying to help him get back here, but very little else. Oh no, she took your buddy! No. No! NO!
"Hey, bitch! Give him back to me!"
Your voice echoes unnaturally.
"Give HIM BACK!!!"
No response. You call for him again. And again. No response. Your anger and frustration wells up inside. Did she make you...kill him? You can't help but glare at your hands in disgust...
"Come out and face me! Bring him with you!"
You can hear Melquior now. He sounds like he's begging for his life. And then screaming. A portal opens up and the white woman's voice booms.
"You must choose. Your life, or your friend's!"
By nature, you are selfish. But Melquior has become such a part of you. Losing him would be like losing part of yourself. Screw Ralsabeth - Melquior will be your friend forever!
At the thought, Lorthos drops from the sky.
"Oh, and take your stupid squid, it keeps kissing me."
"It's an oooocctttooopuuuusss!!!" you can hear Melquior cry out.
Good to know you didn't hurt your little buddy.
"I choose..." you deliberate for a while, but you make a decision.
"I choose myself. I am to live on."
"Very well. Typical human response, and to think I thought you were different."
You grunt at the comment, only slightly unhappy with your choice. Melquior would want it this way. The windless area suddenly begins to gain wind, eventually blinding you. When you can open your eyes again, you find yourself in the football field alone. It's raining pretty hard, and since the school never invested in turf, it's pretty muddy. You feel kind of groggy like you'd been dreaming for a long time. You begin to hope you had been dreaming, but you find a note in your ahnd from Melquior. You decide not to read it - you want to detach yourself from him now. You stagger slowly to leave the football field, the mud all around you not jiving well with your humongous clown shoes. Just as you make it to the goal area, you are sent spiraling to the ground with a frying pan. You look up to your attacker, seeing the cold, killer eyes of Nigel. With your friends gone, and nothing left to fight for, you put up very little fight as he smashes you into the cold, muddy ground. Then, he picks you up and ties you to the goal by your hands, your body hanging limp, and beats you with a wiffle ball bat for what seems like hours. All the time with an uncaring look in his eyes. You can't feel your body anymore, but you hear a familiar voice.
"Stop!"
It's Ralsabeth's! They begin to dispute, but you can't see it, heck, you can't feel or taste anything other than blood anyway.
"Stop now, Nigel!"
"Come on, babe, you protecting him?"
"S-stop! Don't touch me!"
"I thought you liked it!"
"I-I don't! I said stop! Let go of me!"
What's he doing to her?! You can hear the drone of police engines and ambulances. Good...
"They're here now! They're going to take you away now! Now-now let go!"
"Aaaaaahhhhh!"
In a rage, Nigel begins to beat at you again, as hard and fast as he can. The authorities can be heard running towards yelling at him, while Ralsabeth sobs loudly. You can't feel anything still, and the taste of blood is gone now. It's beginning to get hard to hear and breathe now too. The last thing you hear are Ralsabeth's words.
"I'm sorry...I never told you that I do love you..."
You were loved by all.
...

But, don't worry! The great god of the sky had mercy upon you. You are to be reborn as a demon, and your friend released back into the world, his memory of you gone forever. One day...you may meet again.




Option History:
> Other: With one hand, take off your giant clown pants, and attempt to use them as a giant clown-pants parachute as you float down to the ground in your heart-pattern boxer shorts. Then play it off as a joke.

> Go to your friend's house.

> Go to school: Don't ditch your only backup for when shit hits the fan.

> Other: Crash into the monster. First priority is to get him as far from the girl as possible.

> Other: The warden's asleep. Time to put your Sneak score to good use. Try to escape silently.

> Go home to gather an army of clowns

> Admit love for Ralsabeth

> Go South to beat the crap out of Samantha

> Search for treasure on the plateaus

> Approach woman, of course. Never leave an area without examining all the corners.

> Look around Emily's Statue for Entrance

> Look around statue more

> Hide under desk

> Search Desk

> Search Rainbow Nurse (Take her Tranquilizer Gun)

> Search Octopus Tank

> Make a Radish stew that will make you heavier then hop across gaps.

> Allow Lorthos to hold chocolate

> Choose yourself



Beginning of Story:
You just love the dramatic 'oohs' and 'aahs' that are instinctively drawn out of your adoring crowd as you perform daring and life-shortening tricks. Acting is really important too - you have to keep their emotions and entertainment constantly in your control the entire time unless you like not being paid. Though, for the first time, you've lost control and are dangling from a tight rope, and your arms are starting to hurt... The audience doesn't think anything of it - they believe you're just toying with them again. Your grasp is slippin one finger at a time. The brilliant colors of the tent's red and yellow interior walls and ceiling is messing with your adrenaline tainted vision. One more finger...

Options:
> Let go and pray something will save you
> Allow your vision to fade and just sleep~
> Hold on and scream 'Help!'
> Other: Do what you'd like!
LockeZ
I'd really like to get rid of LockeZ. His play style is way too unpredictable. He's always like this too. If he ran a country, he'd just kill and imprison people at random until crime stopped.
5958
> Other: With one hand, take off your giant clown pants, and attempt to use them as a giant clown-pants parachute as you float down to the ground in your heart-pattern boxer shorts. Then play it off as a joke.
chana
(Socrates would certainly not contadict me!)
1584
>Hold on and scream "Help!"

Edit :Too late!
Maybe you can choose the next action, chana!

Option:
> Other: With one hand, take off your giant clown pants, and attempt to use them as a giant clown-pants parachute as you float down to the ground in your heart-pattern boxer shorts. Then play it off as a joke.


Results:
Ah, heck, there's no way you're not getting paid today! You take off your pants with one hand, (this invokes a few awkward giggles and gasps), and then let go of the tight rope, your specially made clown floatation underpants flap around as you fall. They just so happen to be the heart-pattern ones too. The pants aren't working as parachutes, but your underwear certainly is! Defying physics, you float down slowly and gently. Maybe a little too slowly as you are very exposed right about now. And, it is only made worse by the fact that you turn a deep shade of red at this. Once on the ground you put your large fluffy pants back on and bow. The clapping for your performance is marvelous, it being one of the best shows you've put on for a while. You scurry quite quickly out the tent, colliding face first into your boss's gut. Whoops!
"You need to be more careful out there, sport! I can't have you losing your head and falling."
McCarkle has always been very kind to you since the day he revealed he was your biological father. Not that you'd ever want to look like him though, as his face is very beaten up and crinkly at only the age of 30. And his walk reminds you of a shaved, defiled walrus in Hawaii.
"It was all a part of the act, McCarkle!"
"Yeah, right kid! If it was, then you were trying to delay school for yourself or sum'tin'. It ain't workin'. Now go to your friend's house and go to school. No more skippin', ya hear?"
"I do," you say passively as you dash away, grabbing your backpack and running off, waving goodbye as you leave. Now it's time for you to decide where to go!

You wonder which friend he was talking about. Oh, he meant Melquior!
Options:
> Go straight to school
> Go to your friend's house
> Go to the theatre
> Other: Do what you'd like!

Someone needs to name Gazpar's friend! Whoever chooses Gazpar's friend's name may not choose the next action.
chana
(Socrates would certainly not contadict me!)
1584
> Go to your friend's house.
LockeZ
I'd really like to get rid of LockeZ. His play style is way too unpredictable. He's always like this too. If he ran a country, he'd just kill and imprison people at random until crime stopped.
5958
Gazpar's friend is named Melquior
Marrend
Guardian of the Description Thread
21781
Perfect. Now, there needs to be a "Beltazar" to complete the trio!
Option:
> Go to your friend's house.

Results:
Ah, yes, Melquior! He's been your best friend since you were little and is still a good friend to this day. He began hanging out with you ever since you saved his life from a bunch rampaging crocodiles. You feel like he's been trying to make it up to you despite you telling him it was no big deal. He was very persistent. Speaking of Melquior, you're walking up to his brightly painted house right now! You knock your secret knock that indicates something urgent, giggiling the whole time. Not 5 seconds pass by before he bursts out the door, wearing little more than his underpants yelling his head off. You notice he still has his toothbrush in his mouth.
"What'swrongGazparohmigod?!"
You starting laughing really hard and even harder when he makes an awkward astonished face when he realizes nothing's wrong.
"Not cool dude!" he says annoyed, dashing back into his house. You allow one more immature giggle, then invite yourself in, opting to wait in Melquior's room upstairs. Melquior's done with his morning routine in a flash and comes stomping upstairs excitedly. He grabs his gym bag up, clearly ready to go, but decides he should tell you something first.
"Hey, did you know that big dude is getting off probation today? And that he's actualy going to come to school today? I remember he was the one who let out those vicious aligators."
"I'm not a afraid of any bully. Besides, the more pressing problem is you were wrong: they were crocodiles not alligators."
"Whatever. You don't think about what they are when they're trying to steal your creations."
"Ooookay. Let's just go, okay?"
"Okay."
Melquior is a little bit of a goody two-shoes, but you think he's alright. It's going to be hard skipping school with him in tow. You'd have to ditch him if you decided to go elsewhere, which honestly, isn't your preference.

Option:
> Go to school
> Ditch Melquior and go to....
> Other: Do what you'd like
> Ask Melquior...

When Melquior fights, he looks up a random dish in his recipe book and uses one of his items randomly in his dish to attack! So, keep Melquior loaded up with items.
> Go to school

Don't ditch your only backup for when shit hits the fan.
Option:
> Go to school: Don't ditch your only backup for when shit hits the fan.

Results:

You'd rather not ditch your friend, and if bad things happen, having him with you would be nice.
"Okay, let's go!"
"Mhm!"
You both depart from the brightly colored house and walk down the street slowly and talk about various things as you usually do. Close to your school something wicked approaches! The large kid, who could barely be called a kid anymore, at the age 21. He's handsome - you'll give him that. But his brain is virtually nonexistent.
"Ahhh! Here he comes, Gazpar!"
Melquior hides behind you, attracting the bully with his fear, and his yelling.
"Stop yelling! He's like a shark, ya know?"
"Who's like a shark?!" you hear screamed in your ear, along with a bunch of saliva. You feel yourself lifted from the ground and being yelled at about something along the lines of 'Oh look, you're a clown, I'm going to pick on you.'
You put on your most annoyed face and say:
"You're stupid." But his reactions certainly aren't slow as immediately after you comment on his grey matter, he comments on your face with his fist.
"Hurhurhghe!" he laughs slightly in a slightly retarded way.
"Ow..."
You try to squeak out more but your face muscles don't seem to work at the moment. Melquior takes the hint though, and knocks out the big lug with his frying pan, after which he runs away towards the school.
"Thanks!" you yell towards him. You kick the big jerk and follow Melquior inside the school.

...

About halfway through the day, while chewing on your pencil, you look out the door window and see a monster of some kind attack a girl.
"Ahh!"
"What is the problem, Mr. Wiles?"
You ignore the teacher and storm out the door to help the girl. When outside, you see a monster attacking the girl's face. Upon seeing this you get in a stance. Melquior runs out and jumps into a stance as well.
"Zombies aren't as scary as bullies!" he yells out.
He's ready, but are you?
Option:
> Attack with an overhead bar swing
> Fling bar at zombie
> Leave Melquior to it
> Run away!
> Other: Do what you'd like

Someone needs to name the big bully! Whoever names him may not choose the next action.
Jeroen_Sol
Nothing reveals Humanity so well as the games it plays. A game of betrayal, where the most suspicious person is brutally murdered? How savage.
3885
Other: Crash into the monster. First priority is to get him as far from the girl as possible.
Option:

Other: Crash into the monster. First priority is to get him as far from the girl as possible.
Results:

You back up way behind Melquior, and he charges and attacks the monster with his fryin' pan, weakening it. You then charge into it full force, knocking both the monster and the girl down - you fall down close to the monster. In his scramble to finish off the monster before it escapes, Melquior accidentally hits you with the frying pan, leaving the monster enough time to bite your hand and run away. A large bleeding mark is left on your hand.
"Yeowch!"
"Sorry, sorry!"
"It's okay, but that thing bit me."
"Oh no!!!"
"W-what?"
"Haven't you ever seen a zombie movie? You're infected now!"
"Uh, grow up. that was not a zombie."
Melquior can't seem to decide if he's sad that you disagree, or happy that you aren't turning into a zombie any time soon.
"Anyway, I'm going to go get it! You coming, Gazpar?"
He runs off, but you opt to check on the girl. She's sitting up now, looking at you with her mouth slightly ajar.
"Are you okay?"
"Yeah, I'll be fine."
You sigh contentedly and offer to help her up - she happily takes your hand.
"Mr.Wiles! What is the meaning of this?"
You look back and see the teacher looking at you with piercing eyes. The kids behing her snickering at you, laughing almost in a...sinister way.
"There was a monster attacking her!" you point to the girl.
She immediately cries out in dissent.
"Liar! I was just walking down the hallway and you ran into me!"
"Huh?"
"Well, Mr. Wiles?"
When you try to show her the bite mark on your hand, she acts as if nothing is there.
"I don't see it, young man."
"It's right there!"
"If you're going to lie, at least make it believeable! Now, off to detention with you and the girl!"
The girl yells out again.
"What? No fair!"
"Please, little lady, you were obviously truant."
She complains, but you sigh loudly and drag her to detention with you. On the way you spot the girl of your dreams in a classroom. Her hair is beautifully long and golden, her attire always conservative while being liberal in all the right places. She's a little older than you, but you're attracted nonetheless. She's never even talked to you before, but she waves to you for some reason. the girl you're draggin gets sick of your staring and starts dragging you to detention. Once there you're both told to sit down and not speak, which you happily don't comply by.
"Hey! Girl! Yeah, you!"
"What do you want, you maniac?"
"What gives? I saved you!"
"Whatever. Crazy."
"Ugh, can I at least know your name?"
"Samantha. Now shut up before we get more detention, I have a job to attend to, clown boy."
You ignore her insult and look around the room. It's pretty bland, and you're the only two in here not counting the 'warden' of sorts who isn't even awake anymore. Something is seriously wrong with the school, you need to get out of here. Maybe Samatha could help? You should probably hurry up too, for some reason you feel this sleepy feeling is a little more than not enough sleep. Though, you're curious. What is Samantha's "job"?
Options:
> Kick Samantha
> Yell loudly
> Wake up the 'warden' and show him your bite mark, and request to go to the nurse.
> Look out the Window.
> Other: Do What you'd like

Someone must name Gazpar's crush. Whoever names her may not choose the action.
Ralsabeth

And yes, that is Balthesar rearranged. There you go guys.
Other: The warden's asleep. Time to put your Sneak score to good use. Try to escape silently.
Option:
Other: The warden's asleep. Time to put your Sneak score to good use. Try to escape silently.
Results:

You decide you're going to have to sneak out of here. It should be easy considering the warden is asleep.
"See ya, Samantha. I'm out of here!"
"What? Hey, that's juvenile!"
"I don't care. Something weird is going on here and I'm going to figure out what."
"And I'm just going to let you leave?"
"Come with me then."
Samantha mulls it over a little bit and makes an angry face.
"Fine."
"Great, but stop sighing so loudly."
Samantha gets ut of her chair followed by you. She starts tippy toeing and makes it all the way to the door before you begin. She gives you a thumbs up sign and a warm smile after a quick look at the Warden. You start to tip-toe...but your big clown shoes are mde of squeaky rubber. It doesn't seem to bother the warden so you just continue on. You're almost there when Samantha smiles in a sinister way shushes you loudly, waking up the warden as she leaves the room.
"W-what? What's going on? Get in your seat right now, young man!"
"Oooh, I'll get your for that Samantha!"
"Stop blabbering and sit!"
You obediently sit down. After a few minutes you look out the window and see Samantha sticking her tongue out at you. By now the warden was asleep again, but she bangs on the window, causing him to wake up again and yell at you to quiet down.
"Ughhhh!"
A few minutes later, Melquior comes in and sits down.
"You okay, buddy? I didn't mean to ditch you or anything."
"I'd be better if I wasn't here."
"Here, I'll whip up something to put him to sleep for good."
"You're going to kill him?!"
"Nooo, I'm just going to put him in a coma. He'll wake up. Eventually."
You let out a laugh and Melquior winks then goes to work. He whips up a nice radish soup instilled with some saliva from that monster. You watch as he takes it up to the warden and tells him to taste test it. The warden obeys and is knocked out almost instantly.
"It kind of makes me worry that some of that stuff is in your blood, Gazpar."
"I'll be fine. Come on, we have to help the school."
"Help it with what? I already took out the monster."
"No, something weird is going on."
"What?"
"You saw how they didn't see my mark. They were faking."
"You're right. But, what are we going to do about it?"
"Um...I hadn't thought about that."
You think about it. Perhaps you should chase after Samantha. Or maybe alert the principal. Maybe you should wait for the saliva to affect you. If you get hurt, you may want to admit your love to Ralsabeth before it's too late. The bully Nigel never actually goes in the school either and hangs out in front of the only exit all day. Chasing Samatha may not be so easy. And admitting your love to Ralsabeth may inflict Nigel's rage onto you as he's recently broken up with her. The principal may be affected too and you'd rather not know what the saliva is going to do to you.
"Well, Gazpar? I'd think we may want to regroup at your house. Maybe get some help from your clown friends."
Options:
> Admit love for Ralsabeth
> Chase after Samantha
> Inform the principal of going ons
> Go home to gather an army of clowns
> Go face Nigel now before he's a problem.
> Other: Do what you'd like
chana
(Socrates would certainly not contadict me!)
1584
>Go home to gather an army of clowns.
Option:
>Go home to gather an army of clowns.
Results:

"Let's go to my house and get some back-up."
"Okay, beatcha there!"
The two of you race down the main hallway of the school and outside. Melquior won, but that's fine.
You were lucky - Nigel wasn't out here.
Melquior asks a question.
"What if they don't believe us?"
"Melquior. Clowns don't joke around, and they don't expect others to either."
You then proceed to run home, leaving him in your dust with a "Wut." face on. He realizes you're joking then quickly catches up, laughing at himself. You make it there in record time: 15 minutes. McCarkle is dealing with a midget outside his tent. Once he finishes, you run up to him and gasp something out too quickly because you used up all your air running.
"Eh? Slow down, I can barely 'ere ya."
"I said I need your help."
"What with?"
"There are monsters in our school and everyone's acting weird!"
"What? Did ya hit your head er sum'tin', boy?"
Melquior pipes up.
"No, it's true! We can prove it - look at Gazpar's arm!"
You show him the oddly shaped bite mark on your arm.
"My, you weren't lyin'!"
"Yeah, so we need your help for back-up in case we can't handle it."
Melquior pipes up again.
"Yeah! Cause no one messes with clowns!"
McCarkle chuckles at this and nods.
"Woo! Thanks a lot!"
You watch as McCarkle walks into his tent and comes out with a megaphone. Then, he shimmies up the nearest pole and yells into it.
"ALL CLOWNS REPORT TO THE MAIN TENT!"
The three of you then shuffle into the tent, while wadinf through the countless clowns filing in. The three of you take position in the middle of the tent and McCarkle yells into the megaphone again.
"OKAY ALL, WE'RE GONNA HELP OUT LIL' GAZZY HERE! HE'S HAVING SOME TROUBLES IN SCHOOL AND WE'LL BE NEARBY FOR MORAL SUPPORT - AND BACK-UP IF NEEDED!"
You can't help but beam as your clown friends and family applaud at this idea then all stand up ready to follow you to the ends of the Earth. Clown family is forever.
"Okay," you say "let's go back to the school!"
They applaud again then flock to their mini, purple cars outside. You, Melquior, and McCarkle ride in an even smaller one with a flame decal.
Melquior obviously had never seen anything so cool as he said:
"Cool! I'm getting in first!"
After Melquior has troubles getting in, he doesn't like it as much. You shove him in, then get in with easy. McCarkle hops in and drives. Everything is going fines until Melquior decides he likes the car again and attempts to drive it, throwing you all into the school wall.
"Sorry...!"
"Shut it."
Melquior extracts you from the car after he and McCarkle get out. You're starting to feel tired again.
"Are you okay, Gazpar?!"
"I'm fine, Melquior. Well, it's not your fault at least. Let's hurry up though, okay?"
"Okay!"
McCarkle states he'll have the clowns camp out here on the side of the building. He also gives you the megaphone.
"Just scream 'Sherrrriiiii' into it when you need us, okay?"
Now it's time to decide what's next on the list.
Options:
> Admit love for Ralsabeth
> Chase after Samantha
> Inform the principal of going ons
> Go face Nigel now before he's a problem.
> Other: Do what you'd like
Jeroen_Sol
Nothing reveals Humanity so well as the games it plays. A game of betrayal, where the most suspicious person is brutally murdered? How savage.
3885
Okay, let's get Gazpar friendzoned, or absolutely heartbroken, or at least turned down, or something...

> Admit love for Ralsabeth
Option:
> Admit love for Ralsabeth
Results:

You figure if dealing with whatever is happening is going to kill you, Ralsabeth should know. It might be a little awkward doing this in front of Melquior though.
"Um, Melquior?"
"Yeah, Gazpar?"
"How about you wait with the clowns?"
"What?! Why?"
"Well, we need a competent general for our army don't we?"
Melquior smiles at this and jumps and down excitedly.
"Okay! I can do it real good, Gazpar! Hurry up and use the megaphone soon, okay?"
"I will, no worries."
"See ya later!"
You turn your back to your friends and enter the school. It feels a lot different now. There are parts of the wall coming off where bits of purple splats can be seen. You'd rather not think about whatever it is. You walk down the hall briskly, feeling very lonely and insignificant without Melquior with you. You quickly find Ralsabeth walking down the hallway with Samantha. Ooh, this would be the perfect time to get even with her. You contemplate changing your plan, but Samantha flees upon seeing you, leaving Ralsabeth looking dumbfounded. You take in a deep breath and approach her.
"Huh? Hello, Gazpar is it?"
"Yeah... it's nice to meet you."
"Likewises, I saw you playing hookie earlier."
She lets out the cutest laugh you've ever heard.
"Haha...yeah I saw you not playing hooky. Uh, I actually came to admit something."
"Yes?"
"Well, I actually kind of sort of..."
"Go on?"
"Like you."
"Well, you're pretty darn interesting yourself with your clown suit you wear daily."
"No...I mean I really like you. Like LOVE."
You can feel your cheeks burning as realization dawns upon her face.
"Look... this is really cute, but you're a little too young for me don't you think? I'm not saying we can't be friends, but anything beyond that would be weird - especially so considering this is the first time we've ever spoken."
"Yeah..."
You hang your head in mixed emotion.
"Don't feel so bad, okay? Maybe you'll have a chance with a prettier girl than me."
You doubt it.
"Yeah..."
Ugh, you feel so broken. You walk away down the hallway, still looking at the ground.
"See you later, Gazpar...!"
You push aside the front door and hit your head on a wall.
"Owww...why me?!"
"Because you're useless."
You look up into the mischievious gleaming eyes of Nigel and two of his pals. In your weakened mental state, you almost believe his incredibly weak insult.
"Yeah..."
"Oh, glad we see eye to eye, Clown boy."
Nigel's friends laugh hysterically. Nigel snaps at them.
"Shut up, idiots!"
They quiet down right away.
"So, I heard you have the hots for my girlfriend."
"What?!"
How could he have possibly heard that - it just happened!
"I can see by how wide your mouth is that it's true. See, a little birdy told me..."
You see Samantha disappear around a nearby corner. She must have known what you were approaching Ralsabeth for.
"So, I figured I'd help you."
"What?"
He picks you up by your collar - you're in no state to fight back as he mercilessly pounds in your face. He throws you to the ground. The earlier sensation of not being able to speak is present again. Nigel and his friends kick your sides in. You think your sides are broken, but you can't be sure since you can't really feel much of anything. The sleepy feeling you've had all day is coming into the forefront of your mind right now. Then, it is quickly shoved to the side as you hear Nigel speak again.
"Hahaha! You don't have your stupid chef friend here to help you now!"
He continues to kick your sides in and smash his heel into your face.
You couldn't care less really, you'd rather take a nap. But then you hear another voice.
"Oh, yes he does!"
You hear a frying ban reverb off Nigel's head again. You'd like to see who's saving you but your eyes feel glued shut. The other two can be heard running away, sniveling. Whatever, you can tell it's Melquior. I mean who else would save such a mess as you? You feel really tired now.
"G...azpar?! A...you...okay?! Gaz...r!!!"
Mmm...nice little nap...
You wake up in a very bright place, with oddly colored dirt everywhere - blue! You get up and look around. To the north you see a relatively humanoid female figure. She appears to be naked and completely white with no eyes or mouth to speak of. To the east are a bunch of plateaus of varying height. To the south is another humanoid figure - this one looks like Samantha. Just...smiling at you evilly and staring intently. To the west is where the bright light is coming from. Considering people say never walk into the light, you'd rather not go there.
You can't seem to feel the pain from earlier. Or the drowsy feeling either for what it's worth.
Options:
> Go North to the Woman
> Go East looking for some treasure!
> Go South to beat the crap out of Samantha
> Go South to make ammends with Samantha
> Go West to walk into the light
> Peer West
> Other: Do what you'd like
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