LET'S WORK ON YOUR GAME DESCRIPTIONS!

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author=Marrend
Off the top of my head, I would suggest...

Plot synopsis:
Timothy is a 10-year-old boy, who's very passionate about videogames, and living out the last days of summer before he goes to middle school. It is during this time that he learns some of the most important things in his life, and the most dangerous. Behind the mask of "normal family" are secrets that gnaws at Timothy's very being. Who is this Mr. Knight that his parents have started to see lately? Who is the girl that appears in his dreams? Who is Timothy?


About the game:
The Last Summer is a psychological horror adventure game about childhood, memories, the fear of growing up, and the fear of the unknown. No jump-scares, but, a story waiting to be discovered, with a sprinkle of items to find around, and a lot of videogames references. Get ready to explore Timothy's troubled mind, and childhood, as he unveils the secrets behind his "normal" life.

Features:
-Deep story about childhood, family and full of fantasy
-Many classic videogames references
-2 hours of gameplay
-2 different endings


About us:
The game was made with RPG Maker MV, and made by two people from Italy. Videogames are our passion, and we aim to create a compelling story for everyone as we try to make this game a real work of art.

We Are:
Simone "Lord Macbeth" Granata - Eventing/Programming/Storywriting/Game design

Dave "Mishima" - Character design/Additional pixel art

Thanks for visiting our gamepage! Your support is crucial and really appreciated! - Kibou Entertainment Team


...this? Though, I may have gone a bit overboard with some points, and I apologize for doing so.


Thanks a lot Marrend!
for some reason me game no get on here... not single one QQ
and says that mapping bad.. but cannot change because no have game anymore ;(
Marrend
Guardian of the Description Thread
21781
This might not be the thread to get assistance from in this instance, but, I'll do my best!


So, your game was denied on the basis of needing better mapping, but you cannot change the images that you uploaded because you deleted... the gamepage? Or did you delete the game, itself?

If you deleted the gamepage, you should still be able to post in the image thread. You could use your locker to host images in this case. You can get to the locker in a number of ways, but, the easiest is to hover over your username to activate a context menu, then click on the "Locker" link. I believe it's possible to resubmit gamepages that have been deleted via "Manage Games" (a link's available via hovering over your username), if that's what you're wondering.

If you deleted your game, there may be a way to recover it. If you have a backup of the data, that would probably be the number 1 thing to fall back on, even if you have to re-do some stuff. If you deleted it entirely, and have emptied the Recycle Bin since then, I'm not sure what to suggest.
Nebelung is a surreal exploration game a long the lines of Yume Nikki and Serial Experiments Lain.
Developed by zoe and milky robertson with Game Maker 2.

Game includes multiple paths, and endings.
Has dialogue, cut scenes, and imaginary friends.
Themes include: Suicide, Murder, Loneliness, Drugs, Mental Illness, Stalking, Lying.

And last but not least, Internet.



Marrend
Guardian of the Description Thread
21781
Hrm. Well, I can make a few suggestions. However, even with those suggestions, I think it won't be accepted unless there's a paragraph (or two) of plot-related description. Such as: Who do players play as? What are players trying to do? Is there a conflict that they need to overcome? Stuff like that.
author=Marrend

Not sure.

But it's about a boy named Chojo.
And a girl named Mai.
author=zoe


You have a lot of really dark themes going on in your description zoe.
I thought maybe you could add Cannibalism into the mix? Could be the cherry on top?
Marrend
Guardian of the Description Thread
21781
@zoe: Okay, maybe we can work with that. Do players play as Chojo? Or do they play as Mai? Or, maybe, do players choose between the two, and the game branches from there? Maybe the characters meet up at some point? What happens when they do? Do they fight? Do they join forces?

There's probably lots of ways this idea can go!
author=Marrend
@zoe: Okay, maybe we can work with that. Do players play as Chojo? Or do they play as Mai? Or, maybe, do players choose between the two, and the game branches from there? Maybe the characters meet up at some point? What happens when they do? Do they fight? Do they join forces?

There's probably lots of ways this idea can go!

You play as Mai the whole game.
And then at the end, if you get to the "true" ending.
Chojo must make his decision.

But it's more like his two arms are fighting with each other(?) Then making a decision.
Marrend
Guardian of the Description Thread
21781
Okay, so players play as Mai the entire time. What's she doing in the context of the game? What, exactly, is this choice Chojo has to make in regards to his arms fighting against each other? Is this something that is occurring on a literal level, or is it more of a metaphor? Like, for instance, Chojo might have a "Right-hand man" and a "Left-hand man", and Chojo's choice (conflict?) is choosing one person's opinion (or way of doing things) over the other's.

*Edit: What if the arms are literally fighting against one another? Like, they have a mind of their own, and he doesn't control them. Would his choice involve severing one of them off, or is he finding a way that they will all work together?
Title Cat is RPG

Story Communists say I am doggo. I say no I cat but Communists don't listen. I angry so murder all Communists since I need ultility for business.

Game top up view and kill communists because they say I am doggo. No cat this true, I am cat and am cat with utilitarian idea.

Style is RPG game taking turns.

Characters me and Communists.
author=BusinessCat
Title Cat is RPG

Story Communists say I am doggo. I say no I cat but Communists don't listen. I angry so murder all Communists since I need ultility for business.

Game top up view and kill communists because they say I am doggo. No cat this true, I am cat and am cat with utilitarian idea.

Style is RPG game taking turns.

Characters me and Communists.

At least communists knows how to write properly without looking like idiots ):<
Marrend
Guardian of the Description Thread
21781
Here's what I'm taking away from that paragraph.

  • The protagonist is a cat

  • Communists are specifically creating false propaganda saying the protagonist is a dog

  • At some point, the protagonist-cat has had enough of the lies, and is willing to take arms against the communists


Outside of that, I'm not sure how serious you are, or how serious I should be.
It's hard to tell the level of seriousness in her/his(?) words because her English is so incredibly broken. Anyways, I look forward to what ever "art" you make, BusinessCat.
Okay sorry yes I am serious. Cat is RPG is RPG and real it is not but that magic as I talk now first time now even though English not my language.

Sorry for my time and English you decide your serious level as you Marrend yes.
Marrend
Guardian of the Description Thread
21781
@BusinessCat: If you're serious, and want to sumbit the game to RMN, the description has to be at least 500 characters. Outside of the obvious language barrier, I feel this is your biggest issue. I'm not really sure how much it will help you, but, this article may be of use in coming up with things to say about your game.



However, the thing that's coming to my mind is along the lines of...
In a world ruled by communists, a cat has been singled out. The propaganda they spread speak of this cat as a dog, of all things! As if that wasn't bad enough, the lies keep piling on and on. Enough is enough! It's time for this cat to take a stand! The time of reckoning is at hand!


Cat is a fairly typical RPG game with themes of vengeance and class warfare. While the game is written in English, it is not my native language. I would appreciate any and all suggestions to improve the writing!
...this?
sevene
i just want to be an icy spitted glass of coke.
1000
BusinessCat, PM me your game when it's done; I will help translate your broken English before you try uploading it to RMN.
author=Marrend
Okay, so players play as Mai the entire time. What's she doing in the context of the game? What, exactly, is this choice Chojo has to make in regards to his arms fighting against each other? Is this something that is occurring on a literal level, or is it more of a metaphor? Like, for instance, Chojo might have a "Right-hand man" and a "Left-hand man", and Chojo's choice (conflict?) is choosing one person's opinion (or way of doing things) over the other's.

*Edit: What if the arms are literally fighting against one another? Like, they have a mind of their own, and he doesn't control them. Would his choice involve severing one of them off, or is he finding a way that they will all work together?
I've given it more thought, Chojo is the final boss and you must take advantage of their two arms that have minds of there own, in order to defeat him. He doesn't really control them no, it's more like he is helpless and is forced to watch what they do. He can suggest to them what to do, but at the end of the day the arms are in control, not Chojo.

author=sevene
Thanks for that offer sevene! I think it's quite clear that BusinessCat will need help in making sense out of their English.
It would be nice if someone could give their opinion for the description of my new project~ =)
I have more details written down already, though I do not want to disclose the information for most of the lore and the other characters straight away.


Where the Lost Souls went

Story
They say you are what you eat...but here, you become what you feed.
When you wake up in a forest of shallow dusk, you find your body lost and never found. As a newborn soul with no recollection of your past you can only do so much to begin to understand this worrisome place. That's when you meet Hershel, who offers to help you make a new husk for yourself.

About the Game:
Where the Lost Souls went is a story that encompasses cuteness with eldritch horror elements. It never goes for the cheap scare, but instead builds on psychological terror and the fear of the bizarre. As Wisp, you find yourself in a world that is completely unlike your own, with the goal to find your own personal Husk. While travelling with Hershel you will discover the truth about The Forest and how it was created. Along the way a multitude of bizarre creatures will make your aquaintance, all of whom have their own secrets to uncover.

Features:
- A story about friendship, loss and the ambiguity of morals
- Forge a unique relationship with Hershel
- Start as a Wisp, find your own unique Husk by carefully choosing your actions
- Fight alongside Eldritch companions in a world that isn't quite as haunted as it seems
- Discover a multitude of endings by choosing who gains your loyalty
- Figure out the secrets of The Forest

Characters:
Wisp
The player. A newborn soul, still able to find form. They have no recollection of their past and must now make decisions to gain a new husk, uncovering the mysteries of The Forest along the way.

Hershel
A young deer-like creature. Softspoken and kindhearted, yet estranged from the appearance of a human. Ashamed of his face he hides it behind a mask. Like the rest of the creatures of The Forest Hershel has been given his name for his husk and does not remember who he was in his former life.
Marrend
Guardian of the Description Thread
21781
@zoe: Okay, so, we know about Chojo. Does Mai know about Chojo's condition? I'm still not getting a good sense of what her role is, or what she's doing. Unless it was in an earlier post, and I'm simply being horribly forgetful. Which is totally possible.

@Cirrocumulus-Cloud: Is this game some kind of meta-narrative about giving birth? Like, the wisp is the soul, and the husk is the body, and when the two meet... a new life is born?


Er, anyway, I think it's more or less fine.