THE MESS-UP A WISH FOUNDATION

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pianotm
The TM is for Totally Magical.
32388
author=AlphaOmega247
Granted, but after many years of being good, it turned evil and assaulted your razor.

I wish I knew what a whetstone was. And that I wasn't too lazy to Google it.


Granted. It's a stone for sharpening (whetting) blades and is an essential tool for straight shavers (people who shave with straight razors). They warp and crack easily (keep them wet while sharpening to limit this, as a dried stone can also heat and warp a blade, ruining it.), especially a poor quality one, and such a stone can deform a blade. As it is, one has been used to hone (sharpen) the point on your head. It's very fine quality. You know, developers work hard on their wishes and deserve to have them granted correctly (I know that's over the top, but I couldn't resist).

I wish the furnace worked properly.

Drugs, man. Drugs. But seriously ,sorry guys. I guess I should stop coming on here when I'm babysitting. To many friggin' distractions.

Anyway: granted, you eat the house. Sadly, it's not a chocolate cake it's still just a house with a nasty houselike taste. You only got the ability to digest anything. Sadly, you overeat and your stomach explodes.

I wish I had more time to work.

nhubi
Liberté, égalité, fraternité
11099
Granted but that's all you have time for, everything else drops away, friends, family, fun, all you do is work and work and work. This leads to the inevitable collapse of your immune and nervous system and one day you just walk out into the water and keep going.

I wish for the perfect pair of shoes that never need to be repaired.
pianotm
The TM is for Totally Magical.
32388
Granted. They don't fit. You can cut off about a third of each foot, and then they might fit.

My advice, don't wait until your shoes become uncomfortable. Buy insoles with the shoes. Triples the life of your shoes, I kid you not. As a piano tech, I often have to move pianos myself. I wear steel toe boots. I used to go through a pair in three months, expensive shoes, too. I bought a cheap Chinese knock off of Brahmas and bought a pair of insoles last year. They are still in almost new condition.


I wish I could afford a better graphics card (not that the one I have is bad, but I've been doing some 3D art and some of it's getting pretty big on bytes, if you know what I mean).
nhubi
Liberté, égalité, fraternité
11099
By definition a perfect pair would have to fit...but ok

Granted, though of course to afford it you have to stop paying for food, fuel and utilities, which leads to a no electricity to run the computer, but hey at least you've got the graphics card.

I wish someone would come and sand and paint my window frames, for a reasonable fee.

pianotm
The TM is for Totally Magical.
32388
Perfection is a matter of perspective. Perfect for whom?

Granted. They do an exceptional job, too. Of course, the day after they finish, a bus goes through your windows.

I wish there was more time in the day.
Ok. I'll be right there.
*thunder crash* *sudden darkness* *evil laugh* *cheesy horror soundtrack*

I don't charge money. I'll charge you the same fee as I've charged Karin. >:D

Now I'll be Karin and Nhubi's Soulkeeper!


I wish my teachers would stop having long tests one after the other >.<
nhubi
Liberté, égalité, fraternité
11099
Hey k_s, you messed up the mess up a wish XD. So no on the soul reaping, thanks. I'll go with the flying bus.

Right so, Pianotm, granted, you are suddenly transported to Venus where the day length is 243 Earth days, so you've got much more time. Unfortunately given the rampant greenhouse effect on Venus and the fact its atmosphere is 96% carbon dioxide, you only get a single breath's worth.

karin's soulkeeper, granted they stop having long test one after the other and combine them all into one single test that lasts 4 days straight, if you fall asleep, eat or leave to go to the toilet it's an automatic fail.

I wish the birds in my neighbourhood would start singing the dawn chorus at 6am rather than 5am.

pianotm
The TM is for Totally Magical.
32388
:( It's my initials, not a trade mark.

Granted, the birds no longer sing at 5am, they sing at 6, but this is actually one of many in a long line of indications of the impending destruction of your community by a build up of toxic chemicals gathered over the years, secret fracking nearby, and the buildup of harmful radiation. Soon, everyone starts mutating and the community is quarantined by the government. They soon send troops in and exterminate everyone and blame it on a natural disaster such as earthquake or tsunami in order to cover up the fact that they are largely to blame for your community's demise due to their illegal secret activities in the area. Since I am an animal lover, the birds are completely unharmed through this scenario.

I wish this earache would just go away or at least that I didn't have to use these damned antibiotic eardrops four times a day.
nhubi
Liberté, égalité, fraternité
11099
Fixed and noted. (Also glad you didn't kill the birds).

Granted, however the earache wasn't caused by an infection, but by a parasite and those drops both mutated it and annoyed it, so when it finally burst free it was big enough to take out half the side of your face and angry enough to savage the other before it escaped to terrorise your neighbourhood.

I wish for a glass of ice cold cider.



Granted, but it gives you gastrointestinal distress. Sorry.

I wish that a giant wind gust would blow all of the leaves out of my yard so I wouldn't have to rake them.
pianotm
The TM is for Totally Magical.
32388
Granted, but even irl, a wind gust like that would probably knock out some of your windows, knock a tree into your house, or even take out a part of your house. Damn, I've been through tornadoes that didn't get all of the leaves! Pack an extra set of clothes and hang on to Toto, Dorothy.

I wish I could unpack my Playstation 3 and games (long story, headache inducing, please don't ask).
Granted, When you unpack it it looks fine, but the game discs have vanished from their cases, and the playstation 3 is in latin, though you don't know why or how, so you can't fix it.

I wish I knew what to wish for.
Granted, but you wanted something stupid.
Don't worry you're not getting it anyway.

I wish for an ultimate flawless videogame console.
Isrieri
"My father told me this would happen."
6155
At your feet, poofs the perfect video game system that flawlessly runs any game you have.
But the controller is broken. In fact, no controller you try works.


I wish that I could draw well.
Granted, you draw a well.

I wish I could revive the dead.
nhubi
Liberté, égalité, fraternité
11099
Granted, Zombie Apocalypse, 'nuff said.

I wish I could get this stupid song out of my head.