Oh god I didn't mean to jinx us with my last post! But anyway, lets talk about some things. 2020 has not been my year and boy was I ever completely wrong about it being my year, hell its been nobodies year I'd about assume. But I don't really mean that in regards to the whole covid situation, I'm meaning to my mental health. I work in a grocery store, so work at the beginning of this year was insane, you would be surprised how many times I got snapped at because of masks and limiting people inside the store, not to mention overtime really ate most of it up. So nothing was getting done then. Thankfully the area I live in is kind of spread out so the virus spreading here while spreading hasn't spread nearly as bad as other areas. I've been lucky all year and I really hope I don't jinx it by typing this.
That's part one why I haven't made or done shit lol.
Part two the biggest reason
Anxiety and depression, its everyday I have barely any drive to get out of bed or go to work, I wake up cranky and angry most days because I stay so damn fatigued from worry. There's been no drive to make Super Penguin guy 2, there's ambition but that can only get you so far right?
I'm not typing this to gain pity lol, I just wanted to mention why I'm not active, hell I even stay away from social medias now.
Its safe to say my games will probably never come out, which does hurt I'll admit, but there's things you have to let go of, and its clear the game mak hobby isn't for me, hell I can barely get the drive to write a story let alone make a game.
Maybe if things ever change, and I can finally get myself out of this gray area in my mind, but its never that easy. I'll still participate in some SMBX events if there ever is another one. (might have to propose a new one eventually?) But as for making a game by myself maybe some day.
Anyway, sorry for a rant? Notice? I don't know what to call it lol.