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In-browser version available HERE

Chelsea is the princess of the (definitely real) kingdom of Lemuria. After journeying to the hamlet of Lunenberg and learning about the (definitely real) lizard terrorizing the local peasantry, she and her retinue take it upon themselves to end this menace for once and for all!

Explore the town, talk to its inhabitants, unravel the plots of its various factions, complete menial errands, retrieve cut-rate treasure... This game's got it all!! (it's shortish, dumbish, and hopefully funny -- you should play it)

Lunenberg is a deceptively active town. Despite being positioned well away from anything important, it still sports the all-important amenities such as the Inn, Shop, Castle, and Underground Dungeon. While there aren't too many monsters to fight (apart from the titular lizard), there are plenty of residents to talk to and sideplots to discover.


Definitely a princess and definitely not a runaway from a nearby farm. She has her heart set on fame and fortune, and nothing but the slaying of the most awesome beast around will slake her lust for glory. Finding some treasure would also be convenient, but her luck is terrible and it seems the only stuff she ever finds in treasure chests is expired snack food. Unfortunately her temper is a bit short and she is not above screwing with the hapless idiots that get in her way.


While the jury is still out on whether "Kid" is his name or just a descriptor, Kid has sworn himself to Chelsea's retinue and serves as her bodyguard. Of course, being half-grown, unarmed, and incredibly credulous, Kid isn't very well suited for bodyguard duty, but he'll make up for it in sheer pluck!! (maybe?)


While Gaza may only be 4 years old, this is still 28 in cat years, and enough for Gaza to proclaim himself the adult in the room. His level head and keen nose should prove valuable assets, provided he doesn't encounter catnip... or seafood... or yarn... or rodents... or birds...

Miscellaneous NPCs

In theory, they're a bunch of well-meaning townspeople with their own lives to lead. In practice, they're an annoying bunch with idiotic problems, cryptic hints, and zero survival instinct. Maybe Chelsea can bully some sense into them, but it seems unlikely.

So what're you waiting for? The game is under an hour long and pretty easy to play. Good luck, have fun, and slay some lizards!

Resources courtesy of Whitescrew store (http://hi79.web.fc2.com/). Created for the 1-dungeon jam 2022 (https://rpgmaker.net/events/1_dungeon_to_win_them_all/). Future winner of countless awards and other accolades.

Latest Blog

Browser version now available!

Thanks to EasyRPG and my quest to make most of my junk playable from a browser, this game with a stupid title is now web-playable (hosted on itch.io at https://psy-wombats.itch.io/thankless-sidequests).

Surprisingly painless integration too. (not quite drag'n'drop thanks to some EasyRPG bugs causing unfortunate hangs, but close enough). Would recommend for anyone working on itch-hosted RM stuff.
  • Completed
  • psy_wombats
  • RPG Tsukuru 2000
  • Adventure
  • 03/31/2022 06:49 AM
  • 07/14/2022 09:50 PM
  • N/A
  • 12882
  • 4
  • 240


Pages: 1
I seem to be experiencing a weird bug that's preventing me from progressing? After going down the well and going through the exit in that area, I'm able to walk literally anywhere on the map. Figured I'd just ignore this and make my way to where I was supposed to go while pretending nothing's wrong, but once I go up the set of stairs I'm supposed to go up, I can't enter the cave I need to go into. If I try, I walk right through it. Not sure if this is just happening because I'm running the Windows version through Wine or something, if you want I can send you my save if that'll help you diagnose the problem?
I'm here to second the report given by ngoomie. I'm running Vanilla Win 7, so the issue shouldn't be related to the windows. It happens without fail after exiting the room reached by the well through the right path. At that point, the game is borked. You can go anywhere on the overworld map as well, but any door transitions are inaccessible, though event-transitions, like the one towards the castle, or big Staircases still trigger, nothing cancels the glitch though. I'm sad now, because I'm pretty sure I got everything, I bought the oil before the rope, after I already had the glitch triggered and reverted back to a previous save. No matter when and how, the glitch triggers and the last cave can't be entered (which probably leads to the puzzle that was altered somehow when stepping on a button at the magi-kitties ):(

When interacting with a door from behind xP :

Update: Actually, when positioning oneself in front of where a door would block you, facing it, interacting with it, while the glitch is active, it cancels the glitch. Sadly there are no doors that'd allow us to proceed to the final cave after the glitch has been canceled and cave entrances as well as the entrance to the castle remain un-interactable when re-triggering the glitch.

Come to think of it, this glitch happens precisely at the only cave_entrance-to-Big_Staircase transition in the game. Maybe the glitch rests there. Funnily enough, when the player goes back down the staircase to arrive in the room seen on your fourth screenshot for the game, the glitch cancels as well, but re-enables itself without fail when going back up.

Side-Note: I read in your comment under the review you received that you fixed a sequence break with the bunny suit. I don't know exactly if we mean the same, but there is an easy way to get past the bouncer-bunny by approching from right below it, then it stops you. You cancel the Dialogue, and remain standing in the place where he halted you (there doesn't seem to be an 'step backwards' trigger or the like') and one has only to move into the direction behind that bunny to skip it entirely. I didn't exploit it, I wasn't out to break the game, but I guess you could look at that one again.
Guardian of the Description Thread
@Krolan: Fixed your image link.
I seem to be experiencing a weird bug that's preventing me from progressing?

I'm here to second the report given by ngoomie.

Thanks a ton for the bug reports!

You're very correct that the door->stair teleport was what was causing the problem. I've fixed some passability issues around that teleport that were introduced when converting the game for EasyRPG web. If you care to continue, the arrow puzzle past the well is the only task remaining for the Big Lizard Showdown. I appreciate the time taken to let me know where the issue was in such detail.

Also addressed the bunny bouncer bouncy squares.
Thanks for the super fast response and fix! I seriously wasn't expecting a same-day fix.
This was fun! The quantity and quality of the dialogue here is impressive, especially considering the game was made for an event. Chelsea's a great character, and a lot of the supporting cast were memorable, too. My favorite of them was... Enrique. The fortuneteller and the crow were nice additions, too, as I definitely would've gotten stuck a couple of times without them.

If I have one complaint, it's that the minecart puzzle required too much backtracking. It wasn't really that bad, though.
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