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Regrets and Desires

*peeks head in to check no-one is around, then sneaks in*

Wow... it feels almost alien for me to sit down and write another blog (No. 198 as of writing). Not to mention the last blog for this game was written more than two years ago. And because Icebound is still pending, I'll probably just write the blog here.

So you'd probably be asking me why I'm writing another piece for a game that was completed in November 2014?

Well, thing is... The commercial evil is calling out to me. Like most hobbyists, I do dream about making a full-time living out of doing something I love so I can quit my dreary, soul-sucking 8-5 job.

It can seriously stifle the creative spirit and probably one of the reasons why my game-dev passion just vanished a few years ago. But now, having reached the ripe old age of 30 and forever leaving my twenties behind, I figured that:

1) I can't take life too seriously (most of my games have been pretty serious)
2) Let go of past grudges and
3) It is about high-time I decided to make the life I want to live and not be slave to a dreary job where getting a double bonus at the end of the year makes it bearable (it isn't).

I've also decided to buck-up on my art skills so that when I do go commercial one day, I can at least save myself a few hundred bucks by not hiring an artist. zero-project's (my music-muse) music is free for all commercial work, so that's one less problem to worry about.



Hello Laine, my old friend.


I'm also feeling a bit overwhelmed at trying to familiarise myself with MV. The engine has enormous potential, but all these plug-ins... Yanfly is seriously on a roll. To someone who has been using VX since late 2010-early 2011, to me it feels like the equivalent of going from paddling around in a baby pool, to diving off the 10-metre springboard. But I know it will pay off in the long-term. But I'll probably end up making a few short games in MV before taking this huge step.

It's exciting, but also terrifying at the same time. I need to let go of my innermost fears and just release all that pent-up creative energy. What is my innermost fears, you ask?

Well...

It is the fear of failure. Also, the fear of letting down people who expect great things from you, who expect you to be at the top of your game no matter what. But worst of all, for me at least, is when someone (whether in real life or on the internet) expresses immense disappointment in you. That... has always struck me hard and always sits like a lead balloon in my chest.

As to what happened about a year-and a half ago...

I regret it, and bitterly. I lost a few good friends that day, and I still it to this day. Every time I thought about RMN during my hiatus, that was the first incident I thought of. But I guess I'll have to learn to live with it.

So, here's to a better and more productive 2018! No more fears, no more past regrets, and no more looking back.

This is Luchi, who is now officially back from the dead, signing out.
Blog No. 198 written.

Also, the blog title is totally not a reference to an episode in Granblue.

Posts

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Forget what happened in the past. There aren't any hard feelings over here.
Welcome back ^^)b
StevieRayBones
I refuse to grind with monsters I've just met for money.
265
Looks like you have a lot of downloads and good reviews... definitely wouldn't focus a second on internet drama when ur doing that well
StevieRayBones
I refuse to grind with monsters I've just met for money.
265
Looks like you have a lot of downloads and good reviews... definitely wouldn't focus a second on internet drama when ur doing that well
It's okay Luchino. I think every one fears failure. There is no need to worry about the past. I don't know if they do, but I forgive you, because I really enjoy your games, and ideas. I am glad you're back to game making. Welcome back! :D
unity
You're magical to me.
11176
We all have regrets from the past. Don't let that stop you from doing what you love. You are an extremely talented developer and the world needs more games like yours.
I hope no one's catty enough to hold your self-implosion against you after all this time; if they are, it's on them. I've always thought your games stood out, so I'd love to see you work up to your full potential.
Holy lime favored Tostitos – YOU’RE BACK!? I never thought I’d see the day!

(No, really, I actually thought that you were never going to come back here considering your last blog post that you made. I guess that just proves that you cannot escape the grasp of RMN’s true strangled grip on you once it has you in its clutches.)

Well, anyway, I’m glad that you’re back... It just isn’t the same without you here. (Now if we can only get nhubi back, then we have ourselves a party!)

But, yeah, hopefully you’ll put all of that stuff behind you now and focus on what’s ahead and try not to put too pressure on yourself this time around. Nobody’s really mad at you for what happened all that time ago, so don’t worry about it too much. Don’t treat it as a failure but more of a learning experience instead. Besides, Trisitan can always make her come back any time she wants in the future, so you go work on whatever makes you happy at the moment. I’m just happy that you’re back and still working on games and art again.

And whaddaya mean, “ripe old age of 30?” I’m 32 and I still expect to be making games until I’m at least in a old folks home (or turned into solyant green, whatever).

And, f*ck. I finally surpassed you in makerscore only for you to come back and probably pass me in about a week or so.

(God damn it.)
(gives massive group hug to everyone)

(takes past regrets and dumps it in the trashcan)

Now with that out of the way, I'd better get mucking with RPG Maker MV and try to aquaint myself with all these plug-ins 0_o.

Also, I can introduce you guys to Granblue. >:D

...

.....

.......

Excuse me while I ramble about it in a spoiler.



GBF? What's that?

An abbreviation for Granblue Fantasy, one of the biggest mobile gacha games in Japan. To say it is huge over there is an understatement.

It is a freakin' PHENOMENON. Also known as Grindblue Farmstasy. Better than FEH and FG/O combined, in my honest opinion. I've been playing since August after quitting FE:H back in July.

And why should I be interested in it?

If the names Nobou Uematsu and Hideo Minaba make you go all warm and fuzzy inside, then play this game. Now. (To the uninitiated, these two men are Final Fantasy veterans and GBF is their dream collab project).

So yes, expect lots of airships, stunning visuals and a god-tier soundtrack (you can even make your own airship crews and partake in an e-sports event held every few months called Guild Wars).

On a more serious note, if you want a jRPG that takes you back to the 'Golden Era of jRPGs' (aka the mid-late 90s) then check this beast out.

The main cast is lovable as hell, the Japanese voice work is stellar (the 'entire game' is voiced by well-known seiyuus and while there is no official English release, the script has been fully translated into English and the gameplay is great. The job class system puts FF5/FFT's to shame and new classes are added every few months, the most recent one being the Mechanic.

But!

Be prepared to grind.

A LOT.

And it is a gacha-game, so be prepared to either be F2P (free-to-play) or P2W (Pay to Win or Pay to Waifu).

I used to think Yiazmat from FF12 had a lot of health. Until I came across THIS guy.



Proto Bahamut.

240 million HP... He's using Skyfall, which deals 9,999,999 Dark damage to everyone. But there's a damage cut taking effect there (97% if I worked it out) and still dealt INSANE damage. Luckily I had a revive on hand.

That 30/30 denotes how many REAL-time players are in the raid, including myself.
Raids have a time limit of 90 minutes, but everyone destroyed Proto Bahamut in 5 minutes flat (mainly high-level Light-Lords).

It really needs to be played to be believed. So epixy. And the music is godly. But I wouldn't expect anything less from Uematsu himself.


Also, if I were a dude, Kat would be my waifu. But I've got a serious girl-crush on her. I found my Tristian, Addit. And her name is Katalina.

also, I'm sorry about the Makscore ><

unity, if you're still into yuri, Kat has you covered. >:D (actually, all three of the girls in my water-team significant others are female)

So, if you're interested, I can get you all set-up. ^^

Oh, and it has a PS4 A-RPG in the works developed by none other than Platinum Games. A trailer was shown during Granfest (yes, the game is so huge in Japan it even got two days just dedicated to showing off new stuff...) and it looks bonkers.



Ahem. Expect the same level of enthusiasm when I start my gam-mak again. But I needed to spread the love. GBF is going to have a fantastic 2018. I can feel it in my bones.
Remember girls can have girl waifus too ;D.

Dat Katalina looks like a bae. I hope that Grindblue Farmtasy ARPG comes to PC too. Not much money here for extra underleveled PCs. :'D
Red_Nova
The all around prick
7488
Welcome back, Luchino. RMN is better off with you kicking around.

author=Addit
(Now if we can only get nhubi back, then we have ourselves a party!)\


I hear you, I miss nhubi so much...
Wow, completely missed this! Glad to see you back Luchi!

EDIT: Holy crap! Your art has improved so much!
Happy New Year, everyone. ^^

I hope you're still working on Linus, bp. I've never forgotten about that particular project, hehe. As for my art, yes, it has 'levelled up' quite a bit over the last year or so xD. I'm making a concerted effort to get better at most of my creative hobbies (there, resolution for 2018 confirmed).
Really looking forward to seeing more work from you, including blogs. Your dev blogs were excellent reads.
I too have that feeling when it comes to MV! Been building games on VX for a very long time. And I concur with the 'lead balloon' feeling. 8-5 jobs suck, disappointing people sucks. I guess ultimately, all you can do is throw the weight from the balloon into your creative endeavors. That's what I've always done--and I'm certain that's why I still exist.

I've never played this game, but I'm currently downloading it. I've always been a fan of games made in VX.
@Luchi-Chan... I mean, @PolarCactus:
Not sure what happened, and it is not my place to know the specifics, but I feel you: fear of failure, fear of disappointment. I know them all to well.
A good laugh for you: I'm catching up to you in age. LOL! ;P

P.S.: Yes, I do ghost off and on a lot on this site, visiting you and BluePeriod from time to time. XD
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