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Dialogue Teaser

  • tpasmall
  • 01/18/2013 04:09 PM
  • 811 views
Below is a scene I have working on in which Marcus is reunited with his wife Amy, after 10 years of being shipwrecked on the island of Aliquam. This contains major spoilers, but I wanted to share a piece of what I was working on with everyone. Feedback is greatly appreciated.

(scene fades into Amy’s home)

Marcus: And that’s how I finally got back.

Amy: I’m so sorry, I...I’m...I just can’t believe you’re alive!

Marcus: Hey, it’s ok, I’m home now. It feels good to be home.

Amy: ...you’re so thin, can I make something for you? You must be starving!

Marcus: Ah, I’ll be alright. Seeing you again is nourishment enough for me.

Amy: *blushes* You always did know the right thing to say...

Marcus: Well, you always made it easy to.

Piper: Mommy, mommy!

(Piper and Conley walk in)

Amy: Yes, what is it Piper?

Piper: Conley threw a frog at me!

Conley: Did not!

Piper: Did to!

Amy: Conley, is that true?

Conley: No!

Amy: Conley, tell mommy the truth.

Conley: Ok...yes, but she called me a booger face first!

Amy: Is this true Piper?

Piper: ...yes...

Amy: You know we don’t call each other names, I want you to apologize to your brother.

Piper: ..sorry Conley...

Amy: And Conley, even if someone calls you a name, that doesn’t give you the right to throw frogs at them. Don't you think you should apologize to your sister?

Conley: ...sorry Piper...

Amy: Ok, thank you both, run along now.

Conley: Hey mister, that’s a cool bow! Are you a hunter?

Marcus: I am, and thank you. My father gave me this bow, he was a hunter too.

Conley: Cool! When I grow up, I want to be a hunter!

Marcus: Well, I’ll tell you what, you can have this.

Conley: Oh wow, an arrowhead! Thanks mister!

Marcus: You’re welcome, be careful with it now.

Piper: Hey! What about me?

Marcus: I’ve got something for you too.

Piper: A necklace! It’s so pretty!!

Marcus: And it will look especially pretty on you.

Piper: Thank you!!

Conley: Let’s go show dad!

Piper: Yeah!

(the kids run off)

Amy: ...you kept the necklace...

Marcus: Yeah, it helped remind me of you..so...

Amy: I got married.

Marcus: I thought you might have.

Amy: I would never...

Marcus: I know.

Amy: If I knew you were alive...

Marcus: I probably would have done the same thing.

Amy: I didn’t want to. It just kind of...happened. One day Clifford was just there. He took care of me. I was a mess.

Marcus: You don’t have to defend yourself, I understand.

Amy: I had to bury you. They had to pry me off your casket.

Marcus: There was a casket?

Amy: There is an entire memorial built to you, it’s at the pond, behind the house. King Magnus himself came for the service.

Marcus: What was inside?

Amy: Some clothes, a bow, arrows, anything that represented you.

Marcus: Ha, I guess that’d be about it.

(a knock at the door)

Amy: Come in!

(Faeroe enters)

Marcus: Were you looking for me Faeroe?

Faeroe: Actually, someone named Geoffrey Fulton is. Said he wanted to meet the man that everyone is talking about.

Marcus: Fulton eh? The name isn’t familiar, I guess I should find out what he wants.

Amy: It was great seeing you Marcus. I just want you to know, no matter what I’ll always love you.

Marcus: You too.

(Marcus turns to leave)

Amy: And Marcus...I’m really glad you’re alive.

Marcus: You too. *grins*

(scene fades into Caudine Manor)

Posts

Pages: 1
Despite being a spoiler I read it with great delight: so very emotional. And Marcus didn't act like some total jerk, but he could. I like how soft, gentle, and intelligent Marcus is portrayed.
Thanks! I'm trying to make my dialogue more raw and emotional. I've been reworking all the dialogue in the game, and this is my favorite scene so far. He's a real classy guy and I feel like this scene shows that side of his personality perfectly.
Pages: 1