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Story:
“Mindless Box” is a dating sim from Maimie’s Toybox about magic, ghosts and romance. Players will join the young witch Emily as she fumbles her way through a seemingly mundane punishment. Spending her nights cleaning a set of old classrooms for the use of Autumn Harvest Academy, she soon finds a dirty secret buried within. As it cracks, leaking negative energy among other things into the air, she soon finds herself battling against a dark magic. A dear friend is sacrificed, another betrays her. Emily soon questions the very things that maker her her and just how much good the academy has done for her.
It's up to the player to make sure she doesn't lose sight of herself as well as helping the boy of their choosing find themselves. Mindless Box is a tale of family, love and demons; both inside and out.
System:
4 character routes with 3 endings each
2 hidden routes that incorporate every character
Various bad endings that may reveal new information about the MB universe
Adult version contains various erotic CGs
Over 126k possible words
Characters:
Any questions, comments, critiques and everything in between are greatly appreciated. This is my first time working with Ren'Py, so I'm a bit worried about how I'll do. I appreciate any and all help! Thank you!
“Mindless Box” is a dating sim from Maimie’s Toybox about magic, ghosts and romance. Players will join the young witch Emily as she fumbles her way through a seemingly mundane punishment. Spending her nights cleaning a set of old classrooms for the use of Autumn Harvest Academy, she soon finds a dirty secret buried within. As it cracks, leaking negative energy among other things into the air, she soon finds herself battling against a dark magic. A dear friend is sacrificed, another betrays her. Emily soon questions the very things that maker her her and just how much good the academy has done for her.
It's up to the player to make sure she doesn't lose sight of herself as well as helping the boy of their choosing find themselves. Mindless Box is a tale of family, love and demons; both inside and out.
System:
4 character routes with 3 endings each
2 hidden routes that incorporate every character
Various bad endings that may reveal new information about the MB universe
Adult version contains various erotic CGs
Over 126k possible words
Characters:
Any questions, comments, critiques and everything in between are greatly appreciated. This is my first time working with Ren'Py, so I'm a bit worried about how I'll do. I appreciate any and all help! Thank you!
Latest Blog
gabicho
- Production
Commercial- gabicho
Renpy- Visual Novel
- 12/04/2014 06:16 PM
- 04/20/2017 02:16 PM
- N/A
- 48717
- 69
- 1213
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CloseI love ren'py games and otome is my fav genre. Jack and Lucas are the characters that caught my attention.
I wish you the best with the project!
I wish you the best with the project!
Interesting play so far. I find it a little hard to get into Emily, but that is to be expected. There are still a few typos every now and then, but nothing worriesome.
What does distract is the menu - while it looks nice, the orientation is hard. I had to look twice at the options to make out anything. The save files should also be somehow marked when they are saved - it feels very uncomfortable when nothing changes and you can't be sure the game actually saved.
The pattern of the dialogue boxes makes it harder to read as well. The low-saturated one (that one green-tone) is far easier on the eyes than the bright purple or bright light blue one. The screens are simple enough for it to not be "too much" pattern, and while it does look nice and in place, it certainly makes reading harder.
The characters are all rather odd .. and for an otome-game, not all that likeable. Not that this is necessarily a bad thing. Although Lucas and Daniel are far better off.
I only worry that very flawed characters can easily fall prey to crappy backstories and explanations that try to justify their flaws with over-sentimental drama.
And please, please for the love of god and all that is holy, do not let Jack stay like this if you pursue his path. This is painful to read, so very painful.
Don't let him beg and/or apologize every single dialogue box.
I dare not think about actually going for him.
I know people can act like that, but trying to please you all day shows very little of his actual personality.
What does distract is the menu - while it looks nice, the orientation is hard. I had to look twice at the options to make out anything. The save files should also be somehow marked when they are saved - it feels very uncomfortable when nothing changes and you can't be sure the game actually saved.
The pattern of the dialogue boxes makes it harder to read as well. The low-saturated one (that one green-tone) is far easier on the eyes than the bright purple or bright light blue one. The screens are simple enough for it to not be "too much" pattern, and while it does look nice and in place, it certainly makes reading harder.
The characters are all rather odd .. and for an otome-game, not all that likeable. Not that this is necessarily a bad thing. Although Lucas and Daniel are far better off.
I only worry that very flawed characters can easily fall prey to crappy backstories and explanations that try to justify their flaws with over-sentimental drama.
And please, please for the love of god and all that is holy, do not let Jack stay like this if you pursue his path. This is painful to read, so very painful.
Don't let him beg and/or apologize every single dialogue box.
I dare not think about actually going for him.
I know people can act like that, but trying to please you all day shows very little of his actual personality.
Denisa99
0
Damn, it ended at the most interesting part. I can't wait for the full release! Btw, my favorite boy is Daniel <3
gabicho
1887
@ Kylaila;
Allow me to apologize in advance if this sounds kind of defensive. I usually don't like responding to critique with anything but a thank you, but I really feel like I should clear up a few things regarding the boys.
Allow me to apologize in advance if this sounds kind of defensive. I usually don't like responding to critique with anything but a thank you, but I really feel like I should clear up a few things regarding the boys.
I definitely agree about the save files needing a marker. I realized too late that it needed one but was already a week late with the demo, so I'm going to change it for the main game! I'll probably do a huge overhaul of the buttons for the save screen, in fact. I was also a bit iffy on the dialogue boxes and wasn't sure if they'd be easy to read or not. I'll probably make them darker/more faded so as to bring out the white font.
As for the preference screen, I was honestly going for chaotic. I probably won't change it, save for making the buttons easier to access. I may change a few of the labels, but that's about it.
As for the characters, that's exactly what I wanted you to feel. This game was thought up because I was really tired of a lot of otome characters being really crappy, but then they have a sappy backstory that makes the main heroine go "Ohh! Poor baby!". Or as soon as they spill that story, they change and become princes. I also hated how fans excused terrible behavior with a "Oh, he was abandoned as a kid!" comment. Rest assured, there will be no sappy backstories save for 1 character, but he's one of the only ones people seem to like right away. Not only that, Emily won't be the type of heroine to really care for it, since she's kind of too wrapped up in her own self pity. Players will also have a choice to stand up to these guys and knock them off their high horse. If you don't, the relationship may not even last till the end. I knew the demo would really shake people the wrong way when it came to these guys, since it leaves you with pretty much nothing and no development. I also understand that going through the routes will be EXTREMELY hard for most people. But I hope that when the full game comes out, people will get to see what I was going for and be able to complete the routes to the best ending. Or at least be able to sit through summaries of them pfft.
That was... actually the whole point of Jack. His apologizing and trying to please Emily is an underlying indicator of him really having nothing to him as a person. Even Emily knows it and tells him to stop apologizing with the scene in the classroom. He'll try to excuse it early on, but if you can see through that crap it'll help him to change. I do agree that his lines are too over the top for different reasons, but he won't really change unless you make Emily sort of bring him off of this "I love you so much" kick. I'll reign them in a bit though.
I'm also curious if you could remember any typos? I'm trying really hard to fix that, so I'll go over the script again since I honestly don't remember my autocorrect showing anything. But if you could remember any, that'd be awesome! I'm going to have playtesters and proofreaders for the main game, so hopefully it won't be an issue.
Thank you for writing honestly about what you thought of the characters. It'll help me to change up a few lines and bring out what I want to say a lot easier! I was expecting this sort of reaction, but at least now I'm starting to think of ways to fix things.
As for the preference screen, I was honestly going for chaotic. I probably won't change it, save for making the buttons easier to access. I may change a few of the labels, but that's about it.
As for the characters, that's exactly what I wanted you to feel. This game was thought up because I was really tired of a lot of otome characters being really crappy, but then they have a sappy backstory that makes the main heroine go "Ohh! Poor baby!". Or as soon as they spill that story, they change and become princes. I also hated how fans excused terrible behavior with a "Oh, he was abandoned as a kid!" comment. Rest assured, there will be no sappy backstories save for 1 character, but he's one of the only ones people seem to like right away. Not only that, Emily won't be the type of heroine to really care for it, since she's kind of too wrapped up in her own self pity. Players will also have a choice to stand up to these guys and knock them off their high horse. If you don't, the relationship may not even last till the end. I knew the demo would really shake people the wrong way when it came to these guys, since it leaves you with pretty much nothing and no development. I also understand that going through the routes will be EXTREMELY hard for most people. But I hope that when the full game comes out, people will get to see what I was going for and be able to complete the routes to the best ending. Or at least be able to sit through summaries of them pfft.
That was... actually the whole point of Jack. His apologizing and trying to please Emily is an underlying indicator of him really having nothing to him as a person. Even Emily knows it and tells him to stop apologizing with the scene in the classroom. He'll try to excuse it early on, but if you can see through that crap it'll help him to change. I do agree that his lines are too over the top for different reasons, but he won't really change unless you make Emily sort of bring him off of this "I love you so much" kick. I'll reign them in a bit though.
I'm also curious if you could remember any typos? I'm trying really hard to fix that, so I'll go over the script again since I honestly don't remember my autocorrect showing anything. But if you could remember any, that'd be awesome! I'm going to have playtesters and proofreaders for the main game, so hopefully it won't be an issue.
Thank you for writing honestly about what you thought of the characters. It'll help me to change up a few lines and bring out what I want to say a lot easier! I was expecting this sort of reaction, but at least now I'm starting to think of ways to fix things.
That is quite alright. It makes a lot of sense and an interesting take on the genre, although it can impact the feeling quite a lot (Jack is an epitome of unattractive, not that good an incentive in an otome game).
Yet I would love to see it done well. While it is a little bit over the top, such character traits are rather common, sadly.
I think the mystery will keep players interested, but there is little incentive for romance so far. Nothing set in stone, of course.
And as a sidenote, I know games are games, but it is worriesome when some stereotypes are enforced too often. And when it comes to romance, certain misconception are so common, I'd find it very disheartening to see them exploited in a wrong light (which is one of the many reasons I dislike most otome games, despite being interested in the genre). The "nice guy" should be the most obvious one here.
Thanks for clarifying!
I initially intended to write them down the moment I saw them, but I didn't to keep on playing. But I know roughly where they were. I need to get some sleep now, but I will write them down tomorrow.
Yet I would love to see it done well. While it is a little bit over the top, such character traits are rather common, sadly.
I think the mystery will keep players interested, but there is little incentive for romance so far. Nothing set in stone, of course.
And as a sidenote, I know games are games, but it is worriesome when some stereotypes are enforced too often. And when it comes to romance, certain misconception are so common, I'd find it very disheartening to see them exploited in a wrong light (which is one of the many reasons I dislike most otome games, despite being interested in the genre). The "nice guy" should be the most obvious one here.
Thanks for clarifying!
I initially intended to write them down the moment I saw them, but I didn't to keep on playing. But I know roughly where they were. I need to get some sleep now, but I will write them down tomorrow.
gabicho
1887
^ Of course, I agree. I'm planning to reign in the lines quite a bit, but still try to keep the personalities that I had intended for them to have from the start. I think the addition of people critiquing the scripts before I actually add them to the game will help with pointing out places that are too over the top. It'll help me to get out of my own head a bit.
Oh, you don't have to! I was only asking if you remembered them off the top of your head or something. Since the demo portion will also be edited for the full game, hopefully those mistakes will be fixed by then.
Oh, you don't have to! I was only asking if you remembered them off the top of your head or something. Since the demo portion will also be edited for the full game, hopefully those mistakes will be fixed by then.
OMG another, game! I was replaying QMS the other day, and started doodling the characters. <3 I know this one won't be related (or it might, idk, I haven't played it yet).
I can't wait for the full version! This was very interesting and I'm glad that there is a plot beyond "date these guys" within it. The designs are all fabulous, Stephen's is my favorite, though Daniel is my favorite guy. I really like Emily and I think that there is great potential for character development within her. My only complaint would be that she's a little too convinced everyone's into her.
gabicho
1887
@silenthillz - Thanks so much! Mindless Box won't be related to any of my other games, but there are plenty of easter eggs hidden in the game's art pertaining to them!
@Ebeth - Thanks! I'm actually working really hard on developing an actual central plot to the game above dating, since that's always been my favorite aspect of certain otome. Especially when it's a plot that you'd have to play all routes to piece together. I'm glad you pointed that out ;w;
Ah yes, she is definitely convinced that everyone is into her. It's part of her conceited nature. She gets back down to earth though once the routes progress. Thanks again for your comment!
@Ebeth - Thanks! I'm actually working really hard on developing an actual central plot to the game above dating, since that's always been my favorite aspect of certain otome. Especially when it's a plot that you'd have to play all routes to piece together. I'm glad you pointed that out ;w;
Ah yes, she is definitely convinced that everyone is into her. It's part of her conceited nature. She gets back down to earth though once the routes progress. Thanks again for your comment!
I don't play otome type games usually, but I thought I'd try this one out because the MC seemed to have an actual personality and the storyline seemed more fleshed out here which is cool. I'm really interested in how the game will turn out.
1. What connotes romance games to you? Is it struggle leading to a happy end, or sweet fluff cg events?
I don't know if I'm a minority here, especially since a lot of fictional romances tend to move way too fast for me, but I like things to happen more slowly, and for there to be a type of struggle going on before characters end up together. I don't know what cg means (Computer graphics?) but I don't mind fluff as long as it makes sense. Like they're not all over each other if that's not their personality (for ex, I don't see this MC as getting overly lovey dovey right away).
2. Is Emily too forced to the point that you can't relate to her?
Not really...she has the "can't be bothered" attitude that I had when I was around her age, and I do know people who are moody in a similar way. I'm hoping that she'll change a bit throughout the story though, to be a little less selfish or insensitive perhaps?
3. Are any of the boys too over the top that you can't find them realistic?
This is a hard question for me to answer. We don't really see enough of them to get a deeper read on any of them. At the moment all of them seem a bit superficial since they're all displaying the most obvious (and somewhat unpleasant) characteristics first, but I'm assuming with time we'll get to know other aspects of their personalities which won't make them so papery. As for realism I've known people who have shown characteristics displayed by all of them. So I would say that none of them are out of the realm of possibility, but some are definitely more common than others (Daniels and Stephens are a bit more common than Jacks and Lucas's from my limited experience).
4. How do you feel about visual novels that include things like item fetching?
Fun. VNs where you don't get to do anything can be boring.
5. Do short dating sims ending in romance bother you in the sense that it doesn't seem plausible for two people to fall in love in that time?
Usually. Unless there are other factors that speed up the process (like them knowing each other beforehand, a note/hint on more time having passed or both of them going through something life-threatening or life-changing and bonding quickly over it) I'm not going to expect two characters to move from general disdain/apathy to love and adoration in a short period of time. So...short answer I guess is it depends on how it's portrayed.
1. What connotes romance games to you? Is it struggle leading to a happy end, or sweet fluff cg events?
I don't know if I'm a minority here, especially since a lot of fictional romances tend to move way too fast for me, but I like things to happen more slowly, and for there to be a type of struggle going on before characters end up together. I don't know what cg means (Computer graphics?) but I don't mind fluff as long as it makes sense. Like they're not all over each other if that's not their personality (for ex, I don't see this MC as getting overly lovey dovey right away).
2. Is Emily too forced to the point that you can't relate to her?
Not really...she has the "can't be bothered" attitude that I had when I was around her age, and I do know people who are moody in a similar way. I'm hoping that she'll change a bit throughout the story though, to be a little less selfish or insensitive perhaps?
3. Are any of the boys too over the top that you can't find them realistic?
This is a hard question for me to answer. We don't really see enough of them to get a deeper read on any of them. At the moment all of them seem a bit superficial since they're all displaying the most obvious (and somewhat unpleasant) characteristics first, but I'm assuming with time we'll get to know other aspects of their personalities which won't make them so papery. As for realism I've known people who have shown characteristics displayed by all of them. So I would say that none of them are out of the realm of possibility, but some are definitely more common than others (Daniels and Stephens are a bit more common than Jacks and Lucas's from my limited experience).
4. How do you feel about visual novels that include things like item fetching?
Fun. VNs where you don't get to do anything can be boring.
5. Do short dating sims ending in romance bother you in the sense that it doesn't seem plausible for two people to fall in love in that time?
Usually. Unless there are other factors that speed up the process (like them knowing each other beforehand, a note/hint on more time having passed or both of them going through something life-threatening or life-changing and bonding quickly over it) I'm not going to expect two characters to move from general disdain/apathy to love and adoration in a short period of time. So...short answer I guess is it depends on how it's portrayed.
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