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Not really scary, just frustrating

  • mjshi
  • 08/07/2015 03:12 PM
  • 1981 views
Spoilers beware in Story and Impact sections!

Game Overview:
You play as Une (whose full name I can't pronounce) in her quest to find her sister (who looks like a guy and has a name that's either pronounced Lin or Lane) while evading phantoms that make your fear go up, but interacting with dead bodies that you are perfectly fine with being next to.

Review

I will break down this review into five parts, and evaluate the total by averaging the categories. (This way, my review will only be 20% biased!) I have attempted to complete the entire game, however, the dev has not specified how many endings there were. I have gotten... three? about. Although, I'm not counting the various gameovers I've gotten along the way.

Story 2/5


No, it's a note that says that holy water doesn't work on the phantom things.

This is definitely not a story-heavy game, though it is a chase-heavy one. Even after playing, you know very little of Un..? Un-el-ma? Oo-nel-ma? and Lin... Lane?'s backstory other than something had happened in the last village, something about a Reaper, Unelma having murderous tendencies, and that a lot of people really didn't like them.

The story also lacks some consistency and polish, what with the aforementioned note in the church, as well as a katana somehow being in the attic of a religious sanctuary. (This game doesn't take place in Japan, does it?)

The only way to sort of understand why these things are happening to you is to read the four note scattered around various houses. There really is not much story to be, quite literally, found.

The game certainly is character-driven, but none of those characters had noticeable development. Unelma (in one of the endings) being revealed as the killer did not come as much of a surprise. Her callous reactions to the dead had long ago hinted to the true murderer of these villagers (I saw it coming all the way from that one guy in the house screenshot. Scroll down.)

Gameplay/Mechanics 3.5-4/5


Those, my friend, are called blatant plot devices!

The gameplay comes primarily from looking for objects, walking around, and avoiding suspicious-looking characters that try to chase you when you get in their line of sight (classic horror RPG mechanic, a bit overused though).

However, the 'fear' and 'seal' mechanics are extremely interesting, although they're rather unpredictable and lack explanation or description. I feel like these mechanics could be explained more to the player, either through the game description or some kind of ingame initial stage that *shows* the player how these work without the player being at risk of a gameover from experimentation.

>> Gameplay difficulty: It's pretty easy once you get the hang of it, there are plenty of fear-reducing items that you might not even get to use.

I have a slight objection to the blatant plot devices railroading you, though. There's virtually no explanation as to why pink floating spinning crystals are conveniently blocking places that the plot will address later on.

Graphics and UI: 3.5/5


She probably isn't. Also, this room is nice and uncluttered, but then- BAM


My eyeesss

The custom facesets and UI is definitely a plus to this game and enhances the horror-feel, however, there are many minor mapping issues and a lot of the maps feel extremely cluttered. The fog effects contribute greatly the the cluttering. Perhaps simplify some of the maps, then playtest it with the fog effect on. I'm sure that without the fog the village looks perfectly fine, but as of now my eyes hurt a bit from looking at the screen for too long.

My only other suggestion is to simplify the UI a bit as well, as there are many aspects of the UI that you don't even use (such as: status screen, equipment screen, quests tab). Might I suggest the Non-RPG Menu?

Audio 3.5/5
The tracks fit nicely with the atmosphere, and the sound effects certainly helped set the mood. Using music found on the 'net is definitely a step above using RTP music.

Impact 1.5/5
I felt no empathy for the characters, nor did I particularily care about what had happened to the village. I had no attachment to any of the residents, after all. There was no prior interaction between my character and any of the given villagers, and all the flashback interactions were downplayed quite a bit by Une's two-facing from "Oh, thank you so much for the food!" to "I guess I should feel grateful but rather I'm angry that I'm being pitied" that completely takes away the impact.

Although I felt slightly sorry for the person my character proclaimed was 'a nice guy', there were never any moments of "NOOOOO why did you die, nice neighbor-man?!" but rather something more like "Oh. Look, there's blood. I better go follow the bloody footprints!"


Congratulations, you are now a psychopath!

Une did not receive any character development, and for most of the game her remarks came off as rather deadpan, even cold, especially when she observed a dead body and said "I'm glad he's dead." Her observations on the various dead bodies weren't integrated with the larger story, and they felt more like forced bits of backstory, especially when Une calmly clarifies each and every person's relation to her, as well as what they did when they were alive, completely disregarding the blood-soaked floorboards. It felt more like an epitaph on a gravestone, or Une talking to someone else about the dead villagers long after this event rather than a single character's reaction to the passed away.

tl;dr
While the gameplay is innovative, the graphics are custom-made, and audio selections are aptly-chosen, what this game really needs to work on is its plot, backstory, and character development.

It's difficult to give this game a consistent rating, as it excels in some parts but work is needed in others.

Overall Average: 2.85/5
Rounded up: 3/5

Final Verdict:

Senpai, please don't notice me!

Posts

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Thank you for the feedback!
I greatly appreciate it :)
Even though I take pride in the story itself (while I'm aware her background is not exactly original) I can see the points you demonstrated there and how I could've executed it way better.
These shorts are sort of an experience gather for me and this review gave me plenty to think / improve.
I guess I can trust my sense for music and the slowly but surely improving art.
I guess in terms of presenting the story I still have more to improve on.
With character development, I didn't get it right this time for some reason, it makes me slightly sad and I'd really like to improve it even post publishing, but once it has a certain foundation in the game, my mind just wants to build on that.
Maybe in the next game. :)

mjshi
Jack of Most Trades
6414
I find that with character development, it's easier if you have a relatable character, or if your character is nonhuman, give them something to sympathize with.

For example, it was hard to sympathize or care much about Une's surroundings because of the way she lightly dismissed the death of others, even going so far as to say she was glad some of them died. Is there some traumatic event that happened that caused her to make light of human lives? If so, hint to it, give Une more dimensions that make her feel more human, more like someone the player could see themselves as and sympathize with.

Why does she hate being pitied? Is it because she feels like being pitied = being looked down upon? If so, then from where does this hatred come from? (There must have been something in her past that made her change from feeling gratitude to feeling annoyance. People aren't born knowing that being pitied is something bad. I, for one, would happily welcome the free food.)

You did really well for a first game, and the game overall has a very polished feel :) As for the story, try writing out the storyline in flowchart format and writing down what Une's actions in/responses to that event were, and try to list what motives she may have had. Also, you might want to fix that one note in the church ;) Good luck!
author=mjshi
I find that with character development, it's easier if you have a relatable character, or if your character is nonhuman, give them something to sympathize with.

For example, it was hard to sympathize or care much about Une's surroundings because of the way she lightly dismissed the death of others, even going so far as to say she was glad some of them died. Is there some traumatic event that happened that caused her to make light of human lives? If so, hint to it, give Une more dimensions that make her feel more human, more like someone the player could see themselves as and sympathize with.

Why does she hate being pitied? Is it because she feels like being pitied = being looked down upon? If so, then from where does this hatred come from? (There must have been something in her past that made her change from feeling gratitude to feeling annoyance. People aren't born knowing that being pitied is something bad. I, for one, would happily welcome the free food.)

You did really well for a first game, and the game overall has a very polished feel :) As for the story, try writing out the storyline in flowchart format and writing down what Une's actions in/responses to that event were, and try to list what motives she may have had. Also, you might want to fix that one note in the church ;) Good luck!


It's actually the second game but the first one is like 20 minutes long without much gameplay, so I didn't feel like it's a game I should put up here.
But might as well call it my first because this is the first where I had to synchronize gameplay with story and characters whereas thatwas just story and characters.

I actually really like the way you described tracing back her motives, I should make a habit of that as well as the flowchart. I used to really dislike doing it for unknown reasons, but as I started planning out the next short, It helps way more than I thought it would :)
And damn that note I even forgot about
I'll patch it asap xd
Anyway you helped me a lot so thank you! :D
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