Need Proofreader help.

Hello everyone, I'm looking for someone who can help me with my project Breath of Fire fan game.
This project have been delayed for long time and I really want to finished it but I unable to do that without a help.

Right now i need proofreader to fix the error in the dialogue I created. Also to check if there is any weird conservation or something didn't make a sense. The script is about 30 page.

Also I don't have a deadline for this job, so you can take your time but in exchange please give me some update.

If you are interested please PM me and I will give you the material.

Thank you very much.

Hello (Yeah i know this is way to late)

Yeah so i realized i been here for long time and i never actually introduce myself.
I came from Indonesia and i used RMXP since it came out although i haven't finished my project since that day.
Actually i started to think that i need more active in everywhere, so here i am.

Nice to meet you guys XD

Help with dialogue

Sorry fo distrubing :D

First i must tell you that I'm bad at English and some people who played my game said it to, there lot of grammar error in the game. So in order to fix that i asked someone to edit my dialogue and he already finished, the main problem i don't know if he do a good job or not.

So my request is can anyone helped me to read his work and tell me if he do a good job or not?
Thank you very much.

Breath Of Fire Fan Game


History in this world was dominated by a war, worst war that recorded happened about 100 years ago, some people from human tribe started believe that human is chosen by God to rule all tribe that exist in the world. Lot human supported this word and war became more worst. The war itself ended after pillar of light that came from the sky.
At that time life being became a salt and the world became sand.

At present time, some suspicious guys looking for a girl, it was coincidence Aele found her unconscious in middle of the forest, after hearing weird voice asking him to help her, he bring her back into a village.
After few days that girl awake and introduce her name as Ryuna, when she want to ask Aele he left her alone in confusion. After go from the village those guy who search her was attacking, eventually Aele came and help but he outnumbered.
That time a Dragon came out from nowhere blast those guy along with the forest.


Name : Ryuna Bateson
Age : 16 year
Weapon : Fuda Paper

Naive, stubborn and love to sleep and eat anything as long editable. Also she know nothing about mainland because she spent most of her time with the other Dragon Clan hiding from the world. Her sister go for her task and haven't comeback for few year, Ryuna became impatient and go to mainland with Freia when she meet Aele, her worst nightmare.

Ryuna was trained became a Summoner because her lineage, but her lack of concentrate make her slow at this, she also learn ancient way of Magic, Bypass Incantation, by draw a pictures in paper and infused it with Mana she enable to used a magic according the pictures in paper, but she only remember few magic because slack to much.

Name : Aele
Age : 22 year
Weapon : Sword or anything he can use even a broom.

Aele is quite famous in Central, because he broke some antique that priceless, accused for harrasing a noble women, failed in his job and lot thing. Being hunted by some people that have lot grudge to him that`s why for a while he hid in small village, place he will meet Ryuna, his most troublesome problem.

Name : Nina Wyndia
Age : 19
Weapon : Scythe Rod

Nina was work in Archaeologist department, she travel lot time to find a ruin, explore it and make a report. She was never think that Ruin in Forest of Punishment will lead her into biggest problem in her live babysitting Aele and Ryuna.

Nina is fast because her affinity with Wind Magic because her lineage, she also can use Water based magic to fight.

Another main character


Battle System
Battle system will be same as Original BOF game, a 3/4 view battle system. With lot animation for character and skill to make battle more interesting and flashy.
The different from original battle system I used CTB instead normal turn based system.

If you interested to try the battle system you can download it here

Ccoa UMS
Ccoa CBS
Trickster CTB
Golden Shadow Battle System Edited
Trickster Combo and Conditional Skill
Trickster Passive Skill


Aele apartment.

Central City

Mine cave

Game File and Audio File
If you encountered Error cannot find Hungry SE, here the file

History stated there many tribe exist int this world, but most them became extinct because the war. Here is the list of tribe that people still know :

West Region : The main city located in Lessen and underground factory city.

Dirt-Eating Clan : A race of anthropomorphic moles who built their world underground and lives there quietly most of them live only for 30 years. In One Year War they became main target from Lord because their Factory and Mineral Mine.
Shell Clan : A race of large bipedal armadillos. Despite their look, peaceful people and accomplished farmers. In One year War they suffered a lot because most of them lived in Lessen Region.

South Region : Most of this region covered by water or they city itself build above an water, main city is Venetian that became tourist attraction, many noble or rich man build their villa here.

Creeping Clan : The Creepers of the frog-like Creeping Clan are uniformly cheerful and narcissistic.
Manillo : A race of bipedal fish that are able to survive on land.. All of this clan work as merchant and banker, they can make anything became a money.

North Region : Cliff and snow region, Fae tribe build their city in to of mountain make them hard to visit

Fae Clan : A tribe of winged people that resides in the kingdom of Wyndia in North Region. Most the other clan agree Wing Clan is the most beautiful and handsome clan, they have very high pride to their wing and like to show it. The thing Wing Clan most hate is an Imperfect (For Fae Clan that have terrible wing, or child from Fae and another clan)
Grassmen : Grassmen are the longest-living clans. Only few of them that still exist in this world.

Central Region : The biggest and most modern country,

Forest Tribe : They are a group of swift wolf-like people. The Forest tribe are a clan of hunters who live in the forest and revere nature. Most of this clan became a ranger.
Woren : A tribe of cat-people, resembling tigers. Before Woren knows as wild clan that people fear, because they eat people. They also believe in White Tiger as they god, most people called them Pagan. In One Year War most Woren tribe was hunted and killed. The one left, live normal with another tribe but there still lot number that live as Pagan.

The Lost Clan
Dragon Clan : Most people not aware about this clan, only a Historian know about them.
Faeries : Faeries was mention in some urban legend, but no one actually see them.

Skyla Draguno


Sephiroth Spawn
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