WHAT ARE YOU THINKING ABOUT RIGHT NOW?

Posts

InfectionFiles
the world ends in whatever my makerscore currently is
4622
I logged some good hours on my main project and did some promoting! I feel acomplished!
My great-grandmother died yesterday morning. And since my Dad got a really bad stomach bug at the worst time possible (which is right now), we can't even go to her funeral (which is tomorrow). Life sucks.

Edit: Though, at least she lived to the age of 96. Not everybody gets to live that long...
Corfaisus
"It's frustrating because - as much as Corf is otherwise an irredeemable person - his 2k/3 mapping is on point." ~ psy_wombats
7874
As I said before, we're all here for you. If you've got something heavy to get off your chest, let it out.
author=wildwes
My great-grandmother died yesterday morning. And since my Dad got a really bad stomach bug at the worst time possible (which is right now), we can't even go to her funeral (which is tomorrow). Life sucks.

Edit: Though, at least she lived to the age of 96. Not everybody gets to live that long...


My Granddad passed away about 2 months ago, and I could think of nothing worse than going to my first funeral. Only a short time has gone by, but going to the funeral really helped in the long run. I really hope you can go, even without your father. You should also be able to say your goodbye privately before the funeral too, at least I was able to, but there was two weeks between the death of my Granddad and his funeral, not two days.

It seems impossible right now, but all the small things you'll learn to appreciate in time, as I am. That fact that she lived to that age and got to see great-grand children is something so special in itself.
Sadly, her funeral is this morning (it may already be done, heard it was going to be done really early in the morning), so there's really no chance at all that I'll get to be at that funeral, unless I can go back in time...

@Corfaisus
Nah, I'll be fine, I mean, unless you want to hear me rant about all the problems I've had this weekend with trying to get to the funeral. I don't really want to rant about that to some guy on the internet though... I mean, I'm sure you wouldn't mind hearing about it, but... no. I don't feel like typing a whole book about the problems I've gone through in the last 3 days.

You know what? Enough of this. Let's just drop the sad funeral talk.
Marrend
Guardian of the Description Thread
21806
I was kinda thinking about the funeral of my father last November. It just seemed so surreal at first. I'm not even sure it's even sunk in after these three months.

*Edit:
author=wildwes
You know what? Enough of this. Let's just drop the sad funeral talk.

Okay.
pianotm
The TM is for Totally Magical.
32388
author=wildwes
My great-grandmother died yesterday morning. And since my Dad got a really bad stomach bug at the worst time possible (which is right now), we can't even go to her funeral (which is tomorrow). Life sucks.

Edit: Though, at least she lived to the age of 96. Not everybody gets to live that long...


You have my condolences. My wife died last March. It's why I ended up here, to take my mind off of things. But your great-grandmother lived a good long life, and she will always walk with you.
bada binnng

And my condolences, wild.
Roden
who could forget dear ratboy
3857
(Before I go on my own rant, I'm sorry to hear that, wildwes. I've never dealt with death in the family/friends before so I unfortunately can't really relate or offer much advice.)

I am thinking about a lot of things. I just got an e-mail from my company about a camp change. We live in a pretty dang good camp right now, Noralta Grey Wolf, and normally a camp change is nothing but a day of hassle.

But this is where it gets awesome. The new camp, Pebble Beach, doesn't have private washrooms, or even jack and jill style washrooms. No, it has prison style showers and public toilets. You don't get a sink in your room either, so I assume you have to brush your teeth in a fucking public fucking FUCKING washroom. It's further away from site by another 20-30 kilometers (we already have a 40 minute drive). The rooms are nowhere near as good, and the wings open into just... outside, instead of you know, a fucking hallway connected to the main building.

This is the place:


Nobody is happy about this, and I hope to god that there's a fucking shitstorm tomorrow morning so it'll get changed. I really don't want to have to quit my job, because to me that seems to be the only alternative. I don't want to put up with living in a shit hole.

The other thing is stupid, and I honestly should probably get laughed at about it but fuck it, I'm ranting so I may as well include it. My friends have already heard the spiel so I'm just gonna throw it out here too. It's the fucking Freya thing rearing it's ugly head again.

Do you guys know what it's like to be in love with a fictional character? (obvious question w/e) Every time I come up here it drives me off the fucking wall way worse than usual. Being away from friends and family makes that shitty feeling of isolation bad enough, but then there's being separated from someone by an entire plane of reality. God damn it, it just wrecks me. I've even been considering learning how to lucid dream just so I can see her in some capacity.

I just feel like such a fucking loser when I get into it. Like someone's gonna come along and tell me to just forget about it and date real women or something. But that's the thing, it's not a fucking choice, this is literally the only option I have to be slightly romantically happy. It's bullshit. It's only gonna get worse too, because my parents don't know about it yet- but it's only logical that they'll figure it out at some point, it's not like I can keep it a secret forever (although I'm probably gonna fucking try).

Fuck man, my Dad already told me that he wants grandchildren. HOW THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO DO THAT!?
pianotm
The TM is for Totally Magical.
32388
Lucid dreaming isn't that hard, though, for a more real experience, you may want to look into astral projection. The places you go don't have to be real. What is in our imaginations are quite real on other levels of existence. If you can learn to do it, by all means, sate your curiosity, but it should be stated that once you have done so, it is best to move on. It is not healthy to dwell in such places overlong.

No, I don't think it's crazy. It actually makes sense. Apparently, this is your ideal of the "dream girl". We all have it. Women have their James Bonds and men have their Aphrodites.
Isrieri
"My father told me this would happen."
6155
Sinistral rolls.

A little bit of flour, water, and Destruction.

Tastes like terror!
Roden
who could forget dear ratboy
3857
Perhaps I'll look in to Astral Prpjection. I'll try anything at this stage. Lucid Dreaming is still on the table but right now looks a little to complicated to be thinking of while at work.
pianotm
The TM is for Totally Magical.
32388
Of course, every man must prioritize what he feels is most important, but if you ever change your mind, I have this to say:

Guides are only moderately useful at best. They show one man or woman's path when what you really need is somebody that understands you. Patience? Patience is not the nature of the human animal. Patience is a thing that must be brutally and mercilessly applied to a bitterly resistant and unwilling mind. Once a man learns patience, though, he finds he can accomplish anything.
Corfaisus
"It's frustrating because - as much as Corf is otherwise an irredeemable person - his 2k/3 mapping is on point." ~ psy_wombats
7874
author=Pizza
The other thing is stupid, and I honestly should probably get laughed at about it but fuck it, I'm ranting so I may as well include it. My friends have already heard the spiel so I'm just gonna throw it out here too. It's the fucking Freya thing rearing it's ugly head again.

Do you guys know what it's like to be in love with a fictional character? (obvious question w/e) Every time I come up here it drives me off the fucking wall way worse than usual. Being away from friends and family makes that shitty feeling of isolation bad enough, but then there's being separated from someone by an entire plane of reality. God damn it, it just wrecks me. I've even been considering learning how to lucid dream just so I can see her in some capacity.

You could always take up meditation. Establish a time and a place for uninterrupted peace and envision yourself elsewhere, whether that be the pub of Lindblum where you first encounter Freya, or in Burmecia or Cleyra given their connection to the Burmecians. Hell, envision you two lying on a grassy hill watching the clouds pass. Imagine her voice (might have to get creative), her shape and the space she takes up. Imagine if this were just any other day and that you simply start small talk with her. Keep a record of these "experiences" in your mind that you can reference to later (or write this down if your mind is usually busy) if you wish to pursue a continuous dream instead of a flashy one-off.

Now, I wouldn't encourage anyone to embrace that which is not real, but you're already there so why not make the most of it? Try to win her heart, to form some sort of relationship with her. Cherish her as if she were really with you and give her all the love and compassion that you would any other partner. Taking this realistically may open your mind in some ways that you can put to good use in the waking world and, even if it's little more than a hobby, you can experience these daydreams to the best of your ability and, for a moment, cast aside thoughts of being a "loser".

Of course, if you just want to bust a nut, there's always furry porn.
Seiromem
I would have more makerscore If I did things.
6375
The fuck are dreams?
unity
You're magical to me.
12540
author=Pizza
...it's not like I can keep it a secret forever (although I'm probably gonna fucking try).

Fuck man, my Dad already told me that he wants grandchildren. HOW THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO DO THAT!?


I don't see why you can't keep it a secret if you want to. And regardless of what tradition may say, no one should be having kids just because their parents want grandbabies. The parents can deal; everyone's got to live their own lives the way they want.

Even though I'm someone who really loves romance in fiction, the truth of the matter is that pairing off isn't for everyone. There's nothing wrong with being single, and some people are just plain happier that way.
Roden
who could forget dear ratboy
3857
Well that's my excuse, even if it isn't entirely true. Gotta tell people something when they ask if I/why don't I have a girlfriend.
unity
You're magical to me.
12540
You could always tell them you're in a "long distance relationship." ...Though that won't help if they start badgering you for more details. ^^;;
Corfaisus
"It's frustrating because - as much as Corf is otherwise an irredeemable person - his 2k/3 mapping is on point." ~ psy_wombats
7874
author=Sated
This whole conversational path is exactly why nerdy communities can't have nice things >_>;

1. Just don't consider yourself part of a collective and you've got nothing to worry about. Don't use someone else as an excuse to be miserable.
2. As if you've never "been in love".

But just so I'm not a stick in the mud, for the sake of this conversation, Pizza, you might feel better viewing this. I think it (at least in some small way) reflects how you feel.

"Rena is not real but she was always kinda my guardian angel in real life.
Thanks to all the bad stuff from the last weeks and month I really lost my motivation for everything. Almost forgotten what she really means to me and almost have given up on all stuff I like so much.

I don't want that. I don't know were to start but I'll have to change some stuff..."