"THE BREACH" - A SHORT STORY

Hey everybody, it's me StormBlade. If you don't know me or haven't seen me around, it's because I'm relatively new to the site and community. I love to write in my free-time and this is one of my completed short stories. I'm looking for some feedback on it from third-party individuals; friends will praise it, no matter the quality and I'm tired of that, haha. It's not the greatest, and there's probably some spelling/grammar errors, but I still want to present it to everyone. This particular story is a standalone title, but knowing me I might expand the events more in sequels.

So please, read and review truthfully? Can't be an author if you can't take criticism. :)

author=Dallas Landreth, aka StormBlade
Tuesday, May 21, 2013 - 2:34pmDr. Jonas Lancaster walked through the control room, examining monitors with interest and extreme scrutiny, before coming to the computer of his young associate, Marcus Wayne. He placed a hand on the young researcher’s shoulder and leaned down to look at the monitor. “How are the calibrations, Marcus?”

The twenty-six year old research looked to the elderly scientist before keying in a command. “Reading green, sir. We’re ready to go on your word.”

Patting the young man’s shoulder, Dr. Lancaster moved to his seat and looked around at his team. “Alright, folks, it’s now or never. Angela, activate the generators at 85% output.”

Angela Simmons, a beautiful young researcher straight out of MIT, combed his long, red hair behind and ear before activating the generators. “Quantum generators activated, sir. Flux readings still in a normal range.”

Jonas Lancaster watched with his team as the circle of generators glowed with crimson light, releasing particulars of many colors towards a singular point. There was a moment of calmness as the generators buzzed, but then the sound of unearthly thunder cracked through the laboratory. Watching with heightened interest, Jonas called for Angela. “Flux readings, Angela!”

“Flux readings raising through Point Alpha, sir. Increasing stably at the moment.” She responded, looking over the information her computer processed. “We should have quantum breach at Point Omega in under two minutes!”

Thunder ripped through the room again as a distortion began to form in the center of the generators. Jonas smiled proudly, seeing his life’s work coming to fruition before his eyes. “Increase generator output 5%! Reassess calibrations for stability!”

Angela and the rest of the team complied and checked over their systems as Marcus watched the distortion grow more pronounced in the middle of the generators, their crimson glow now a black purple. The particle emissions increased slightly, and the colors grew more vibrant, appearing to seamlessly flow together in a flurry of hues, the effect of quantum energy to the naked eye. It was hypnotizing for the young researcher, but then something else caught his eye. As the distortion more larger and appeared to be stabilizing, he caught sight of something on the other side. “Umm, sir?” He called out, feeling rather uneasy. “I think there’s a problem!”

Jonas stood up and hurried over to Marcus, instinctively looking over his computer screen. “What is it, Marcus? I see nothing wrong with our readings.”

“It’s not the readings, sir; I saw something on the other side of the breach!” He shouted over the crackle of more thunder. “There’s something moving on the other side!”

Jonas looked to Marcus and back to the breach as the thunder stopped and the energy grew stable once more. The field has stabilized and it was holding steady. A slow applauding began for Jonas, who remained focused on the breach. There was silence as the rest of the group looked towards their success, a stable hole through the fabric of reality; a gateway to a parallel world. Then, their moment of Godhood was shattered. From the portal stepped a creature, one unimaginable to our world…and then another, a different kind with a long tongue and no eyes. The first one, a large mass of slithering tentacles somehow roared. It shattered the souls and hearts of the researchers with its unnatural sound, its unholy sound. Jonas reacted quickly and pressed the alarm before ordering his team to close the portal. “Cut all power to the generators! Drop output to Point Sigma as quickly as possible!”

The team scurried as military personnel entered the room. Jonas ordered them to the walkway outside, above the creatures, as more entered our world. Angela keyed in her commands for shutdown, and the generators started once more. The deep purple glow turned to red once again, then a faint yellow as they shut down. The portal remained stable.

“Angela, what’s happening?!” Jonas shouted in confusion. The portal should be closing without the flow of quantum energy, but it remained perfect.

“I don’t know, sir! The energy was cut but it appeared there’s some outside forcing keeping it stable. We never fully grasped quantum mechanics and their potential, but if I were to guess, the fabric of space-time itself is strong enough to support-“

There was a shattering of glass in front of Angela as a massive tentacle wrapped her head and face, pulling here from her chair. Her body went through the broken window and into a mass of tentacles, disappearing with a spray of blood and gore. The room panicked and the soldiers began to fire on the new lifeforms. They focused on the ones closest to the researchers, but were taken by surprise by others. The new world seemed to be simply flooding into the laboratory like an unholy storm of madness. Jonas and Marcus escaped the chaos, but new winged creatures attacked the group and they were forced to seal the room. As they backed against the wall of the elevator, Jonas and Marcus couldn’t speak. Marcus broke down in panick at the loss of Angela, leaving Jonas Lancaster to remorse over his actions and work. He unleashed the horrors of another realm on our planet, and his team paid dearly for it. As the elevator ascended, Jonas put in a call to the Foundation’s Heads on the camera feed, explaining the situation. “Breach was successful, sir, but we encountered hostile creatures.”

“It was a risk, Jonas. You did well, however, and we look forward to future tests at Site Bravo.”

Marcus raised his head in disbelief. Standing, he pushed Jonas Lancaster aside and looked into the camera. “Are you crazy?! You plan to do more tests, knowing those…things are on the other side?!”

“With simple changes, we could very well open a breach to a different world. There is an unlimited number of realities.” The voice replied calmly. “Sadly, you know too much now, and will have to be terminated.”

Marcus grew angry at their words and threats and struck the wall of the elevator. “Fuck you! There’s no way you’ll get away with this!”

“Actually, Marcus,” Jonas’ voice replied, followed by the click of a safety. “There is.”

Jonas killed Marcus in cold blood, blowing his brains over the camera and microphone. “I’ll be putting together another team, sir, and move to Site Bravo. I will proceed with containment here before moving to the courtyard for your transport.”

“Of course, Jonas. The chopper is already airborne. Should be arriving in fifteen minutes.”

Switching off the microphone, he holstered the gun once again and set his watch before keying in a code on his PDA. “Containment procedures…Activated.”

Tuesday, May 21, 2013 - 3:02pm

Dr. Jonas Lancaster climbed into the helicopter and fastened his restraints as the facility imploded on itself, killing all of the unknowing employees and burying the breach and creatures. It would go down as a bio-hazard outbreak for the media, the standard story for Foundation laboratories, and the research would continue elsewhere. It wouldn’t be too long before the Foundation found it; they just had to keep looking…

In any defense, it was written without planning on Notepad, so I imagine there would be spelling and grammar errors. I'm going to go through it and correct them, since I'll be saving this to a fresh portfolio and hard copy it.

As for the ending, it was supposed to provoke curiosity mostly, and will probably be expanded upon and fleshed out more to be more detailed and whatnot. This is probably a 'skeleton' story of something else in the future, not really sure yet.

All-in-all, I appreciate the feedback. It was just something I wrote in my free time.