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So there was this girl that I was talking to for over a year, we used facebook due to living far apart. I took her to prom, bought her flowers, and complimented her just about every chance I got. Well this same person, randomly out of no where defriends me on Facebook and now acts like I basically never existed. Being kind to some people anymore can lead to things that you really don't expect nor deserve, they can really take advantage of you. Have anyone ever had this moment, where your kind to people and those people just seem to take advantage of you then shit on you and then move on?
Corfaisus
"It's frustrating because - as much as Corf is otherwise an irredeemable person - his 2k/3 mapping is on point." ~ psy_wombats
7874
There's always a reason, but don't let this turn you into something you're not. Don't let this be the catalyst to thinking that by giving women things they're obligated to like/have sex with you.
On the other side of the fence, I got attacked by two neighborhood dogs on my way to work today. Called the police and the homeowners got a stern talking to. I went easy on them (even after they tried to make amends to the sound of $30), but if those mutts hadn't been up on their vaccinations/shots, you'd better believe come Monday (animal services don't operate on the weekends) one or both of those dogs would be getting put down.
On the other side of the fence, I got attacked by two neighborhood dogs on my way to work today. Called the police and the homeowners got a stern talking to. I went easy on them (even after they tried to make amends to the sound of $30), but if those mutts hadn't been up on their vaccinations/shots, you'd better believe come Monday (animal services don't operate on the weekends) one or both of those dogs would be getting put down.
Corfaisus
"It's frustrating because - as much as Corf is otherwise an irredeemable person - his 2k/3 mapping is on point." ~ psy_wombats
7874
Like, you weren't insisting on being a part of her life even when she moved (you claim you took her to prom and now you're living far away from each other, so I kind of inferred that), right? I'm giving her the benefit of the doubt and questioning if you ever 'came on too strong' so to speak.
And I have to admit that maybe taking it from Facebook to here isn't necessarily the best course of action if someone has "wronged" you. Public shaming doesn't help your case.
And I have to admit that maybe taking it from Facebook to here isn't necessarily the best course of action if someone has "wronged" you. Public shaming doesn't help your case.
I can think of lots of scenarios that would lead to me defriending someone I've known for a long time on facebook. Not just things that they've done but also things that might be going on in my own life that would cause me to step back and away from certain people.
Some thoughts:
- Perhaps she never liked you as much as you liked her. Just because she decides to go to prom with you doesn't mean she feels close to you, after all. I'm just getting this negative one out the way, because if you follow a case like this with constant contact, it might have gotten awkward for her until she decided 'fuck it' and left. Doesn't make her a bad person, and it doesn't make you a bad person. Just two people who are probably better off going and doing their own things in life.
- Maybe she's had a huge change in her life and decided to weed out her friends list to only keep those she considers close personal friends. You might not fall into that category for her.
- Maybe she's being stalked. The first thing you do in a case like that is remove all non-trusted 'friends' - I'm talking trust with your life, not just 'Oh, yeah, I trust x person.' It's standard proceedure.
- Maybe she had her FB hacked.
- Maybe she has an overly jealous boyfriend who doesn't like her having other men on her friend list.
- Maybe she's moving on from Facebook.
- Maybe she's having a rough time and just doesn't want people to see her feed, thus limiting the friend list.
- Maybe she doesn't like posts you make - whether it be political stuff or silly gammak stuff or just whatever you post on your wall. I've gotten rid of some friends due to that.
- It might be - I'm not saying it is, but it could be that you're creeping her out with your attention. Something I've heard is that some creepers don't realise just how creepy they are until well after the fact. You might not see it but maybe you're just a bit too demanding of her time and it's making her feel like she doesn't want to bother with that kind of thing anymore.
- Maybe she just doesn't remember who you are.
- Maybe she just doesn't like you. Again, it doesn't make her or you bad people, these things just happen.
Honestly? It sounds like you gave the creeper vibes by pushing yourself into her attentions when she very likely didn't want them. I'm not saying that is what happened, but personally, if someone brought me flowers and complimented me every chance they got, I'd be leery of their intentions. What do they want? Why are they doing this? Are they trying to push a romance?
Also, if you gave her stuff without her asking for it (the compliments/attention/flowers) then she didn't use you. You gave her that stuff of your own free will. She does not owe you so much as a smile for it. The idea that because you get someone something means they owe you, that because you're nice to someone means they should be nice back - it's bullshit. Especially when it comes to the male>female dynamic. A lot of men use it to try and guilt women into 'friendships' and 'romances'.
Whatever it is, just move on. Getting bent out of shape over it is only going to cause bad feelings - there's more people out there to meet and some of them might think you're awesomesauce. Why get hung up over what one person may or may not think of you?
Some thoughts:
- Perhaps she never liked you as much as you liked her. Just because she decides to go to prom with you doesn't mean she feels close to you, after all. I'm just getting this negative one out the way, because if you follow a case like this with constant contact, it might have gotten awkward for her until she decided 'fuck it' and left. Doesn't make her a bad person, and it doesn't make you a bad person. Just two people who are probably better off going and doing their own things in life.
- Maybe she's had a huge change in her life and decided to weed out her friends list to only keep those she considers close personal friends. You might not fall into that category for her.
- Maybe she's being stalked. The first thing you do in a case like that is remove all non-trusted 'friends' - I'm talking trust with your life, not just 'Oh, yeah, I trust x person.' It's standard proceedure.
- Maybe she had her FB hacked.
- Maybe she has an overly jealous boyfriend who doesn't like her having other men on her friend list.
- Maybe she's moving on from Facebook.
- Maybe she's having a rough time and just doesn't want people to see her feed, thus limiting the friend list.
- Maybe she doesn't like posts you make - whether it be political stuff or silly gammak stuff or just whatever you post on your wall. I've gotten rid of some friends due to that.
- It might be - I'm not saying it is, but it could be that you're creeping her out with your attention. Something I've heard is that some creepers don't realise just how creepy they are until well after the fact. You might not see it but maybe you're just a bit too demanding of her time and it's making her feel like she doesn't want to bother with that kind of thing anymore.
- Maybe she just doesn't remember who you are.
- Maybe she just doesn't like you. Again, it doesn't make her or you bad people, these things just happen.
Honestly? It sounds like you gave the creeper vibes by pushing yourself into her attentions when she very likely didn't want them. I'm not saying that is what happened, but personally, if someone brought me flowers and complimented me every chance they got, I'd be leery of their intentions. What do they want? Why are they doing this? Are they trying to push a romance?
Also, if you gave her stuff without her asking for it (the compliments/attention/flowers) then she didn't use you. You gave her that stuff of your own free will. She does not owe you so much as a smile for it. The idea that because you get someone something means they owe you, that because you're nice to someone means they should be nice back - it's bullshit. Especially when it comes to the male>female dynamic. A lot of men use it to try and guilt women into 'friendships' and 'romances'.
Whatever it is, just move on. Getting bent out of shape over it is only going to cause bad feelings - there's more people out there to meet and some of them might think you're awesomesauce. Why get hung up over what one person may or may not think of you?
author=Corfaisus
Like, you weren't insisting on being a part of her life even when she moved (you claim you took her to prom and now you're living far away from each other, so I kind of inferred that), right? I'm giving her the benefit of the doubt and questioning if you ever 'came on too strong' so to speak.
And I have to admit that maybe taking it from Facebook to here isn't necessarily the best course of action if someone has "wronged" you. Public shaming doesn't help your case.
Your right, and honestly maybe I only started this in a little fit of rage without even thinking, reality it really don't bother me that much, I'v pretty much brushed it off at this point. I never did come on as to strong on her, maybe I talked a little too much at times,..... But there for a while like months I didn't even say anything due to a lot of things going on, like school work (I did horrible and i mean horrible last year, this is my last year and I'm really pushing myself, that doesn't mean I ignore my friends, and I was off facebook for a while only checking every now and then) and other events. I did want to ask her out at one point but was persuaded not to by her best friend due to some things that she was going through. So I was never really trying to push things that shouldn't be pushed. On the other hand she not only deleted me she deleted two of my best friends as well. Us 3 specifically and no body else from our class. Like she has something against us in general.
Eh, maybe she just doesn't want to be friends with you. Doesn't put either of you in the wrong - she's allowed to choose who she doesn't want to talk to, after all. She isn't beholden to be friends with you or/and your pals just because you went to prom once and you got her flowers and compliment her. They were freely given so she can say 'No thanks' and just step away. It's a nice dream to be able to be friends with everyone, but you gotta respect when someone doesn't want to be. That's their choice.
It might hurt to consider but there's other people out there who will want to be your friends, so just move on.
It might hurt to consider but there's other people out there who will want to be your friends, so just move on.
author=Liberty}
Honestly? It sounds like you gave the creeper vibes by pushing yourself into her attentions when she very likely didn't want them. I'm not saying that is what happened, but personally, if someone brought me flowers and complimented me every chance they got, I'd be leery of their intentions. What do they want? Why are they doing this? Are they trying to push a romance?
[/quote
I get your point here, I guess I am a little more old fashion when it comes to the whole "flirting thing" And maybe because also I'v never really shall we say flirted with a girl before......Yeah honestly, I have never had a girlfriend in my life at all, and when you have someone who is quite in person, and don't quite know how to flirt yeah that doesn't end well. Maybe I was a little creepy..... I'm probably going to lock this thread now, I only started this in a small fit of rage anyway, and was clearly not thinking straight. I tend to let things bother me to much.
author=lonestarluigi
I'm probably going to lock this thread now, I only started this in a small fit of rage anyway, and was clearly not thinking straight. I tend to let things bother me to much.
Eh...about that how do you lock threads?
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