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Sacred Reviews: Pirates of the Internet
thesacredlobo- 03/05/2023 12:57 AM
- 89 views
Intro
"Pirates of the Internet" is a short comedy RPG developed by blih using RPG Maker VX that can be finished in under 15 minutes. Though this being a comedy game makes it a bit more difficult to review in my opinion since comedy tends to be extremely relative.
Story
Summary
You play as a bunch of pirates who are to get an official trial version of RPG Maker XP. After getting this trial version they decide to act like an Internet pirate and turn their 30 day trial into an endless trial. After all, 30 days is nowhere near enough time to create a true master piece. Though the price for pirating RPG Maker VX is extremely high!
Comedy
On the comedy side of things the game tends to rely on the outrageous nature of the situation in order to get the player to laugh. After all, your a pirate running away from the world's slowest boulder. Though the game definitely tosses in a few random moments like a kraken molesting a girl in the background as you run away from a deadly boulder that travels with about as much haste as a snail.
Greatest Strength/Weakness
The story is utterly absurd which is both a blessing and a curse in my opinion. On one hand it helps set the tone of this comedy game. On the other hand, if you don't like the comedy in this game it's absurd nature with probably only add to your frustration.
Gameplay
On the gameplay front the game features the standard combat system found in RPG Maker VX. As such, I really don't have a lot to say about it when it comes to it's mechanics since it's a very basic turn-based system where the player and enemies both take turns trying to kill each other and need to spend MP in order to use their special skills. And seeing as how this is a comedy game the combat is very casual. So it's pretty easy to blow through your enemies using nothing but the standard attack option.
Outside of a few random turn-based battles the game also features an absurdly long wait in line as well as a sequence where you try to avoid krakens in an underground cave as you search for the key you'll need to turn your trial version of RPG Maker VX into the full version. And you definitely don't want to get caught by any of the krakens since you'll take a ton of damage if they hit you. So much so that a few hits will be more than enough to take out your entire party.
But in order to end on a bit of a sour note I'm a bit annoyed at the lack of antidotes in this game since one of the enemies can poison you with their default attack. And since poison never wears off in this game you'll be seeing a lot of red flashes if one or more of your characters get poisoned.
Graphics
Graphically the game relies almost entirely on the RTP for RPG Maker VX with only a couple of edits made on the game's title screen.
Edits that look like they were probably made using MS Paint. Though, I suppose the sheer difference in art quality and the edited on pirate paraphernalia is kind of funny. On the other hand the quality of the maps in this game are rather dodgy in my opinion.
After all, the game's only dungeon features some rather large and vacant rooms while the pirate's ship looks absolutely awful. So awful I have to wonder if the developer was trying to make the player laugh at the sheer lack of boat tiles used in it's construction.
Sound
Sound wise the game also turns to the default assets for RPG Maker XP. As such the game doesn't have that much going for it in this department. The only exception to the RTP music and sounds being on the game's title screen where the background track is "You are a Pirate" from the Icelandic TV series "Lazy Town" that was aimed at children.
Conclusion
"Pirates of the Internet" is a short comedy game about a bunch of pirates illegally acquiring a copy of RPG Maker VX and getting punished for it by the most horrible thing you can possibly imagine. That being said it's comedic nature means it may or may not appeal to you. Though considering this game can be knocked out in under 15 minutes it's probably worth a quick look if your curious. After all, it's not like it's going to take up a lot of your time.
"Pirates of the Internet" is a short comedy RPG developed by blih using RPG Maker VX that can be finished in under 15 minutes. Though this being a comedy game makes it a bit more difficult to review in my opinion since comedy tends to be extremely relative.
Story
Summary
You play as a bunch of pirates who are to get an official trial version of RPG Maker XP. After getting this trial version they decide to act like an Internet pirate and turn their 30 day trial into an endless trial. After all, 30 days is nowhere near enough time to create a true master piece. Though the price for pirating RPG Maker VX is extremely high!
Comedy
On the comedy side of things the game tends to rely on the outrageous nature of the situation in order to get the player to laugh. After all, your a pirate running away from the world's slowest boulder. Though the game definitely tosses in a few random moments like a kraken molesting a girl in the background as you run away from a deadly boulder that travels with about as much haste as a snail.
Greatest Strength/Weakness
The story is utterly absurd which is both a blessing and a curse in my opinion. On one hand it helps set the tone of this comedy game. On the other hand, if you don't like the comedy in this game it's absurd nature with probably only add to your frustration.
Gameplay
On the gameplay front the game features the standard combat system found in RPG Maker VX. As such, I really don't have a lot to say about it when it comes to it's mechanics since it's a very basic turn-based system where the player and enemies both take turns trying to kill each other and need to spend MP in order to use their special skills. And seeing as how this is a comedy game the combat is very casual. So it's pretty easy to blow through your enemies using nothing but the standard attack option.
Outside of a few random turn-based battles the game also features an absurdly long wait in line as well as a sequence where you try to avoid krakens in an underground cave as you search for the key you'll need to turn your trial version of RPG Maker VX into the full version. And you definitely don't want to get caught by any of the krakens since you'll take a ton of damage if they hit you. So much so that a few hits will be more than enough to take out your entire party.
But in order to end on a bit of a sour note I'm a bit annoyed at the lack of antidotes in this game since one of the enemies can poison you with their default attack. And since poison never wears off in this game you'll be seeing a lot of red flashes if one or more of your characters get poisoned.
Graphics
Graphically the game relies almost entirely on the RTP for RPG Maker VX with only a couple of edits made on the game's title screen.
Edits that look like they were probably made using MS Paint. Though, I suppose the sheer difference in art quality and the edited on pirate paraphernalia is kind of funny. On the other hand the quality of the maps in this game are rather dodgy in my opinion.
After all, the game's only dungeon features some rather large and vacant rooms while the pirate's ship looks absolutely awful. So awful I have to wonder if the developer was trying to make the player laugh at the sheer lack of boat tiles used in it's construction.
Sound
Sound wise the game also turns to the default assets for RPG Maker XP. As such the game doesn't have that much going for it in this department. The only exception to the RTP music and sounds being on the game's title screen where the background track is "You are a Pirate" from the Icelandic TV series "Lazy Town" that was aimed at children.
Conclusion
"Pirates of the Internet" is a short comedy game about a bunch of pirates illegally acquiring a copy of RPG Maker VX and getting punished for it by the most horrible thing you can possibly imagine. That being said it's comedic nature means it may or may not appeal to you. Though considering this game can be knocked out in under 15 minutes it's probably worth a quick look if your curious. After all, it's not like it's going to take up a lot of your time.
