MATHAKAR'S PROFILE

It came, spreading throughout her body, crashing down like a tsunami. It swept away all thoughts, all cohesiveness. There was nothing left in her mind but darkness and fears. Her legs shook as if she had remained submerge in an icy cold lake for hours and yet, sweat pearled on her skin, as if she had been walking for days towards the furthest reach of an unforgiving desert. No description, no scientific tests, no poetry could grasp how she felt, could grasp the extend of her fears but it was there, living and breathing like a dark beast. It was there.

Terror.

It might have been desperation, a sudden somersault of the mind, born from her most profound desire to live. She would not die here, not like this, she would not fall to darkness. She would not fall to madness. There was so much more she could become, so much more she could do. It could not end like this. Not like this! She could not give up, not yet, not now. With efforts akin to that of a Greek hero challenged by the gods, she mustered some strength, just enough.

And she walked.

One step at a time, her hands searching, grasping the air, for something, anything. She stretched them as far as she could reach. Yet, she could not see, for, all around her, shadows growled and prowled, tense, like beasts waiting, patiently, for the right moment to pounce and devour their prey. Another step and the air was rip with anticipation, ready to explode like a pimple filled with corruption. The pus oozed from every direction, every corner. One more step.

It creaked.

She heard it, like thunder over her own gasps, far ahead. The cringing of old wooden planks that had seen far too many years and supported far too much weight. Instantly, she froze, like a statue of ice and horror. The shadow fell silent, the beasts disappeared. There was nothing left but her and darkness. She listened and waited, hopeful... And it creaked, once more, just a little closer. It was coming. She turned and, as fast as she could, she ran. Panting and gasping, tears streaming down her cheeks, she ran with despair in her heart and nightmares at her tail.

It crashed down.

It must have grown weaker as years passed by, or maybe it too, gave in to the horrors that lurked in the shadows, but beneath her feet, the floor collapsed. She fell for barely a few seconds and yet, it felt like ages. She tumbled down, a living mess of flesh, clothes, tears and screams, and then, she hit the ground. Gasping for air, she stood in a frenzy. Her mind had been distracted but it had not forgotten the fear. She touched and scratched and searched but there was no escape, nowhere to go. She was down a hole with no way to go up. The creaking grew closer, ever so slowly, advancing further and further in her direction. She looked up.

A dim light.

The shadows crawled away, darkness dissipated as the light grew stronger. She could see the walls now, and the floor. The hole was large enough for her to lay down and deep enough for two men. The walls where of solid rock, too steep to climb. Above, where she had been moments ago, the ceiling was of wooden planks and so was the floor. As for the walls, a dirtied white plaster that had seen far too many years. Rotten wood laid all around her. She kept looking up at the gaping hole, far above as she waited and waited. The creaking came closer, ever so slightly and then, finally, it stopped.

It leaned over.

She couldn't see Its face, for it was hidden under the deep hood of a long cloak that seemed to absorb all light. With one gloved hand, It held a candle, while the other remained hidden deep beneath the cloak. She couldn't see Its feet but was certain that It did not have any. It leaned a bit further and gazed down at her. She could feel Its gaze pierce the core of her soul and she felt herself shrink and shudder. Cold sweat ran down her spine as she clenched her fists, mustering all the courage that was left in her heart. And It leaned further still, inching closer and closer until she thought It might fall into the hole but It did not. It seemed to float, or stand, defying all laws gravity. It inched closer and, with Its other gloved hand, uncovered Its face as It spoke.

“You can never run, never escape, for I know you better than you know yourself.”

She took a step back, seized by sudden horror, and stumbled on a large piece of wood. She screamed, crawled away, closed her eyes but it was all in vain. It was no nightmare, It would not disappear, It would not be denied. And as madness took over the last wisps of her sanity, as her mind collapsed in a final spasm of horror, she would forever remember It. Not because It was horrifying, not because It was disgusting but because It wore her own face and spoke with her own voice.

She had drove her own mind to madness.