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So I start out as the duke of Iceland. It's an independent duchy that is part of Norway as its de jure kingdom. Which means I get a vote in on who gets to be king of Norway and Norwegian crown law affects me (which... incidentally suddenly became a huge pain in the ass at one point. But that's far in the future.)

Iceland is a nicely isolated two-province place where I could get used to the game after such a long break from it. However within in-game days of starting the game I die. Unexpectedly. There's a pop-up saying that my death was suspicious but that I don't know who did it.

Upon starting to play as my heir I find another pop-up saying that I fulfilled an ambition to kill my father. Great start, my family is killing each other before I've even started the game proper. Now this scheming bastard's life was to be a lot longer (maybe because he was a scheming bastard) though his life maybe wasn't very eventful. He had three sons, who also had a bunch of children and things were looking pretty good. So time was to expand my dominion because the cold and harsh island of Iceland is cold and harsh and the green and promising island of Ireland looked so very green and promising. Full of independent earls and counts that were just waiting to be conquered.

I sent my chancellor to fabricate som claims in Tyrconnell, thinking it seemed like a nice place to take on the northern side of Ireland, as close to Iceland you could get in Ireland. (before I had thought about taking the Faroes and the Norwegian isles in the north but the fact is that the kingdom of Norway was far too strong to take on)

It went okay. I conquered it but it seemed the Scottish king had other plans and upon facing the might of the Scots army there was just nothing I could do and had to cede Tyrconnell.

I had to cede it twice. My son tried again later to take it back and did but again the Scots army came and took it and the rest of the duchy of Ulster with it. So any plans of taking Northern Ireland had to be put on the backburner becaus of the Scots. So I took sight of the South. I also had some Casus Belli to take parts of Wales but I felt that was too far away and once I had taken Ireland Wales would be the next to go. But that was way off and a couple of marriages into Wales meant I would at least have some footing there when the time came.

In the south was the province of Desmond. Which I took. This time I made sure to put one of my Irish relatives in charge of the province to lessen the cultural effect and at all times I was vary of what the other powers might do. At some point I also died and my son took over.

My son had certain problems as well as a number of positives. The problem was that initially it seemed like I was only able to father girls. Female heirs don't go over well with the vassals and if I had died then these girls would have gotten pieces of my newly found areas of Ireland and all would have been very problematic indeed. On the good side after years of trying (and even joining a Crusade, hoping to God himself that he might bring me a son) my wife finally bore me a son. Though with me fighting in the Crusades and all I kinda wonder how that happened but I hope there was no... Steward that became duke.

Oh yeah I'm getting my stories mixed up here. Before I fathered a bunch of girls and my father died I was young and had a regent and I was wondering who to marry. The perfect match for me ended up being my... niece. Who was residing in Tyrconnell because of an earlier marriage. I thought what better way to get my filthy hands on Northern Ireland than to make sure it was my family that got it.

It wasn't a bad idea and in Medieval times surely marrying your own niece is just commonplace. Nothing bad did come of it except for my youngest child who died before she could turn one and she was inbred and comatose. Horribly deformed. I have a feeling I might have killed her myself. After that my wife took to religion and chastity and that was our last child. But I had four live ones and one son. Who would take over once I died. But I was young and virile and Ireland opened up to me. I conquered parts of the duchy of Leinster, creating said title in the process so I was now duke of both Iceland and Leinster. With only one son to inherit in gavelkind it meant that all my titles would go to my one son. And with my wife chaste it seemed unlikely I'd get more children any time soon.

Things were looking up. Some drawn out wars and I managed to get Connacht, which I gave to my wife after she had been banished from Tyrconnell. I even got Breifne and kept their lord there and I was only two provinces away from being able to finally found the kingdom of Ireland that I had sought after for so long.

I had just had my 50th birthday and I was working on getting a casus belli against my cousin in Munster to take those last two provinces of his when everything fell apart.

And it fell apart good. I died. My son took over and all my old vassals hated me. Over the years my reputation had grown and my friendliness with my vassals had meant superior military might. Together with the Norwegian crown laws that means I could levy up loads and loads of soldiers to fight for me.

Well at the same time apparently there was some shift in Norwegian policies too because they went back to autonomous vassals, which meant less levies for me. And upon taking the throne my own mother and the lord in Breifne said they no longer wanted to be part of the duchy of Iceland and rebelled. Again I had only daughters. Two of them and if I died my demesne would be divided up between the two, meaning that I'd lose the Duchy of Leinster to my sister/daughter.

So I fought a bloody war against my own mother and someone who titled himself my friend. Trying to hold on to what I (or well, my father) had built.

Halfway through the war I was assassinated. But not after fathering a very young son. Who inherited it all. Including the war. My 9 year old son (who was now me) fought the war to an end. Releasing my grandmother from prison and losing the county of Breifne. My vassals hated me and my regent did not seem very happy with raising me either.

So one day I went on my very first hunting trip. And I was murdered. It was strangely weird really. A bunch of popups saying first how excited I was about it, then another how I went out to hund and then a third with a bowman turning his bow against me saying "sorry".

And thus I died, my sister took over and my younger sister got the Duchy of Leinster and I lost almost everything. But fortunately it seemed as if people liked me better now, even though I was a female ruler and from this I could probably build something. Once I reached the proper age. But I had to go to bed so my conquest of Ireland goes slowly. So very slowly.

But I keep Desmond in my possession. That's where all my Icelandic invasion armies always land before going on to take the rest in wars. My grandmother's Connacht is also still mine because I managed to beat her in that war. So all is...

If not well then at least very Crusader Kings 2.