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Posts
worrierjeb
26
worrierjeb
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CloseI've tried once to send in my game and it said that i need to work on my mapping so i worked on the mapping alot more and resubmitted with new pictures. It got denied for bad story telling and mapping so i spent two weaks working in maps puttingin scripts and then wrote one big paragraph on the game and it still gets denied i don't know what im doing wrong. Quite frankly im getting close to calling it quits and just making games for me and my friends.
worrierjeb
26
and yes ive rread the what do i do if the game is denied and rules of submitting... i did all of that and it got denied.
Aten
1570
Believe me, the standards here aren't that high, and the mods are pretty flexible dudes. So if your game keeps being denied on several occasions, it must, frankly speaking, pretty bad or not that good :\
I suggest keep working on it and trying again when you get better at it.
I suggest keep working on it and trying again when you get better at it.
http://rpgmaker.net/forums/topics/5673/
Make sure that your spelling and grammar is up to scratch, and that what you've written story-wise makes sense. Take special note of the file types for screen shots, and general outlines (three different in-game ones) If you need help with where you're going wrong, post your paragraph and screenshots here and we can give you a few ideas on how to get better.
Make sure that your spelling and grammar is up to scratch, and that what you've written story-wise makes sense. Take special note of the file types for screen shots, and general outlines (three different in-game ones) If you need help with where you're going wrong, post your paragraph and screenshots here and we can give you a few ideas on how to get better.
worrierjeb
26
My paragraph:
One fateful day four innocent boys ,Brandon; Hayden; Darion; and Casey, are pulled into the magical world of Mandra. That fateful day an evil bonewalker teleported to the world Earth and took the Brandon, Hayden, and Casey. He forced them into the world of Mandra where they are forced to fight their way home. Eventually Darion gets called on from an angel to go help save them. With no hope and a large world ahead of them. Will they ever make it home? Find out with the beggining in this demo. With two unique scripts one to allow you to click where you want to walk and the other to name the map name as you progress through the world.
and idk how to put the pictures in here ull have to tell me
One fateful day four innocent boys ,Brandon; Hayden; Darion; and Casey, are pulled into the magical world of Mandra. That fateful day an evil bonewalker teleported to the world Earth and took the Brandon, Hayden, and Casey. He forced them into the world of Mandra where they are forced to fight their way home. Eventually Darion gets called on from an angel to go help save them. With no hope and a large world ahead of them. Will they ever make it home? Find out with the beggining in this demo. With two unique scripts one to allow you to click where you want to walk and the other to name the map name as you progress through the world.
and idk how to put the pictures in here ull have to tell me
worrierjeb
26
Oh and i do have a game that was accepted exept i didnt really try on the game so i wanted submit this new one. So heres the description for the 1st game.
Based off of the Call of Duty: World at War's Nazi Zombies for multiple platforms. Includes the random weapon box, zombies, custom weapon animation, and much more. You can walk outside of the map unfortunetly but cant go far because of the event border. To heal you walk around. Simple game but fun to play.
and that got accepted compared to the game im trying to be serious on (above this post).
Based off of the Call of Duty: World at War's Nazi Zombies for multiple platforms. Includes the random weapon box, zombies, custom weapon animation, and much more. You can walk outside of the map unfortunetly but cant go far because of the event border. To heal you walk around. Simple game but fun to play.
and that got accepted compared to the game im trying to be serious on (above this post).
OK, wj I just recently learn to embed images in post as well so they'll have this format:
I think you have to actually omit the url] and /url] tags. How you get the hyperlink of the images:
After adding images to your locker, left click the link to the pictured desired which will show it on screen. Write click to open the context menu and choose View Image. The url in this new view is the one you copy and paste in between the img] and /img] tags for them to display. By the way, I use Firefox, so if you use another browser it might be slightly different. Sorry I needed to take off the [ in the tags; otherwise it messes up the text. Hope it helps!
[img][url]http://rpgmaker.net/media/content/users/###/locker/XX.YYY[/url][/img]
I think you have to actually omit the url] and /url] tags. How you get the hyperlink of the images:
After adding images to your locker, left click the link to the pictured desired which will show it on screen. Write click to open the context menu and choose View Image. The url in this new view is the one you copy and paste in between the img] and /img] tags for them to display. By the way, I use Firefox, so if you use another browser it might be slightly different. Sorry I needed to take off the [ in the tags; otherwise it messes up the text. Hope it helps!
post=137187
My paragraph:
One fateful day four innocent boys ,Brandon; Hayden; Darion; and Casey, are pulled into the magical world of Mandra. That fateful day an evil bonewalker teleported to the world Earth and took the Brandon, Hayden, and Casey. He forced them into the world of Mandra where they are forced to fight their way home. Eventually Darion gets called on from an angel to go help save them. With no hope and a large world ahead of them. Will they ever make it home? Find out with the beggining in this demo. With two unique scripts one to allow you to click where you want to walk and the other to name the map name as you progress through the world.
This is what I recommend in terms of editing what you already wrote:
Seems to me you repeated your characters' names twice. Mention them only once by exchanging Darion's and Casey's order. After that you can mention the circumstances that lead them there: i.e. the first three ... and the last one was called upon by ... The With no hope sentence seems to be more related to the first three, so mention it when mentioning them. Perhaps the sentence following the one just mentioned, first ask whether Darion will find the others and then mention returning home. The next sentence could say: Start finding out the answers to these questions in this demo. The two other sentences would go separately, perhaps under a Features heading each script with a bullet. The other thing that I notice is you have punctuation issues. You don't need to use ";", use ",". Also, make sure that whatever you write are complete sentences.
About the screenshots, the only thing that immediately caught my eye was the large dark rectangle in the middle of the first one. Perhaps others can give you a better insight.
Friend, you obviously need a lot of help with your mapping. This thread can probably point you in the right direction. Also, play a few other games on this site and make note of how they map. In those screens you posted there doesn't even seem to be any logic behind the tile placement. Seeing how other games use them might give you a better idea of how to use the more effectively.
Okay, where to start first?
Paragraph it is.
As edchuy already said, you don't need to repeat the same information. You don't need to tell everything about the story, but you do need to hook the player. You've given us the four main characters' names and that they were pulled into the magical world. You don't need to add how or why yet - that'll get explained in game (I hope). The "With no hope and a large world ahead of them. Will they ever make it home?" should be a complete sentence. Use a comma instead of a full stop. Also commas are better for listing things (like names) than semi-colons. Apart from that, not too bad.
Now for the maps.
Firstly, there's a lot of space in every shot (besides the battle one). Take a look at some of the high-rated games on the site and see how they handle mapping. Remember that you don't need to make huge maps - smaller ones will suffice.
A GOOD XP ONE TO LOOK AT
There are also a few mapping errors - the first screen has that large rectangle of blank (a river?) and a problem with the layer of the tree. Try using events to create a higher layer for the tops of the smaller trees that are set above hero so that they overlap the big tree. ^.^
The second map suffers from map-spaceitis. You could cut the size in half and still fit all the things that are in the shop in there. As for the last map - I have no idea what the rock formation is supposed to be - a stage? a flat rock formation? The thing I wonder the most about in this map is the strange use of the rock tile above the large rock. No idea what it's supposed to be.
Suggestion - There's a lot more tiles in the RMXP RTP than just a few trees and the same grass. There are dirt roads, long grass, flowers, different rocks, water and much, much more. Nevermind the fact that you can as much to XP tiles as you want. If you're in a village there should be roads, signs, flowers, trees, lots of houses (even if you can't go in them all), streetlamps, life. In nature there are all of those things (not streetlamps and roads though), but in a wilder, crazier way.
Here's a small exercise for you. Take a look outside your window or go to a park and see what is outside, then try to map it. You don't need to use it in your game, but just try to get it as close to what you see as possible. Then cut the size of the map in half and try again. It will give you a much better understanding of how to use the tools at your disposal as well as helping to brainstorm what else to add to maps.
Hope this helps and good luck!
Paragraph it is.
As edchuy already said, you don't need to repeat the same information. You don't need to tell everything about the story, but you do need to hook the player. You've given us the four main characters' names and that they were pulled into the magical world. You don't need to add how or why yet - that'll get explained in game (I hope). The "With no hope and a large world ahead of them. Will they ever make it home?" should be a complete sentence. Use a comma instead of a full stop. Also commas are better for listing things (like names) than semi-colons. Apart from that, not too bad.
Now for the maps.
Firstly, there's a lot of space in every shot (besides the battle one). Take a look at some of the high-rated games on the site and see how they handle mapping. Remember that you don't need to make huge maps - smaller ones will suffice.
A GOOD XP ONE TO LOOK AT
There are also a few mapping errors - the first screen has that large rectangle of blank (a river?) and a problem with the layer of the tree. Try using events to create a higher layer for the tops of the smaller trees that are set above hero so that they overlap the big tree. ^.^
The second map suffers from map-spaceitis. You could cut the size in half and still fit all the things that are in the shop in there. As for the last map - I have no idea what the rock formation is supposed to be - a stage? a flat rock formation? The thing I wonder the most about in this map is the strange use of the rock tile above the large rock. No idea what it's supposed to be.
Suggestion - There's a lot more tiles in the RMXP RTP than just a few trees and the same grass. There are dirt roads, long grass, flowers, different rocks, water and much, much more. Nevermind the fact that you can as much to XP tiles as you want. If you're in a village there should be roads, signs, flowers, trees, lots of houses (even if you can't go in them all), streetlamps, life. In nature there are all of those things (not streetlamps and roads though), but in a wilder, crazier way.
Here's a small exercise for you. Take a look outside your window or go to a park and see what is outside, then try to map it. You don't need to use it in your game, but just try to get it as close to what you see as possible. Then cut the size of the map in half and try again. It will give you a much better understanding of how to use the tools at your disposal as well as helping to brainstorm what else to add to maps.
Hope this helps and good luck!
Your recommendations make sense, Liberty. I can't believe I overlooked the tree and bushes (I think) under it in the first screenshot.
About the fourth screenshot, I just noticed there's this square of flattened rocks near the top center of the screen that seems to be out of place (at least don't fit with the other rocks you show). Good luck on finally being able to get this accepted!
About the fourth screenshot, I just noticed there's this square of flattened rocks near the top center of the screen that seems to be out of place (at least don't fit with the other rocks you show). Good luck on finally being able to get this accepted!
worrierjeb
26
well i looked alot into one pf the links and definetly learned big maps = bad so ive cut thoe shop and reworked some maps and ill have to redo my paragraph to a point. ill re-send in the map pictures of the exact same ones. which will be below here.
