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tardis
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Closepost=203817from tardisDefinitely not. I might have a tough time finding girls I like, but I am not attracted to guys in the least. I'm very homophobic, actually.
maybe you're a homo.
try this love song on for size.
post
Interesting thought. That is very possible. However, it couldn't be derived from romantic failures because I haven't really had any romantic encounters. It's tough for me to fall in love, because the first step is usually infatuation, and I've never been so captivated by someone that I would feel that way about them. It doesn't help that I have incredibly high standards and believe that things like love should run deeper than physical attraction. Most girls I meet are just so...ugh. I'm sure I sound like I'm full of myself saying this, but they're just not smart enough for me.
lower your standards if you're saying this assuming you've never had any romantic encounters whatsoever, and then raise your league as you get that Pimp Game XP up
because what you're saying is going to be less and less sympathetic as you grow closer to being the 40 year old virgin
But seriously to clarify on what I meant; if you're just starting out in the dating scene, having sky high standards when you first jump on the game board is pretty much just setting yourself up for cascade failure. You don't aspire to get at the top of the Leaderboards the first time you play a video game, right?
Forget all this 'EVERYONE BESIDES ME IS DUMB' mindset and just go on small lunch dates with some nice girls every now and then. Jump into something with one, feel it out, see where it goes. If you break up (statistically likely), hopefully on decent terms, you can apply that logic to your next relationship, hopefully towards that ideal girl.
Basically what I'm saying is that people having these pie in the sky conceptualizations for the 'perfect mate' and not doing anything until they find that person is a road to failure. I mean it's pretty unlikely that everyone around you is as fucking dumb as a brick unless you live in the middle of nowhere or something. It's also likely that you're a judgmental piece of dirt that assumes you're smarter than females everywhere while your contemporaries are having dinner with them and banging them while you're at home jerkin' it. Who can say?
Just take a nice chick out for a movie sometime, goddamn. I don't mean to turn this into a LOVE TOPIC or anything but sheesh dude
On topic; love songs are pretty rad. It's really something that music excels at; exploring and evoking a wide range of emotions.
Forget all this 'EVERYONE BESIDES ME IS DUMB' mindset and just go on small lunch dates with some nice girls every now and then. Jump into something with one, feel it out, see where it goes. If you break up (statistically likely), hopefully on decent terms, you can apply that logic to your next relationship, hopefully towards that ideal girl.
Basically what I'm saying is that people having these pie in the sky conceptualizations for the 'perfect mate' and not doing anything until they find that person is a road to failure. I mean it's pretty unlikely that everyone around you is as fucking dumb as a brick unless you live in the middle of nowhere or something. It's also likely that you're a judgmental piece of dirt that assumes you're smarter than females everywhere while your contemporaries are having dinner with them and banging them while you're at home jerkin' it. Who can say?
Just take a nice chick out for a movie sometime, goddamn. I don't mean to turn this into a LOVE TOPIC or anything but sheesh dude
On topic; love songs are pretty rad. It's really something that music excels at; exploring and evoking a wide range of emotions.
I can see what you're saying, feld, but I'm not going to go out with someone stupid just for the sake of having a girlfriend. And it's not like I think EVERYONE is dumber than me. I'm not that arrogant, and I'm sure there are women out there who could mop the floor with me on an intellectual level. But for most of the girls I've met, this is not the case. I'm also not looking very hard, so that has something to do with it, too.
I can see what you're saying, feld, but I'm not going to go out with someone stupid just for the sake of having a girlfriend.
That's not what I'm saying; I'm not saying to go out and get a girlfriend. I'm just saying find a nice girl and go out on a few dates with her. Maybe her intelligence will surprise you, maybe it won't. Either way you have gained something from the experience, maybe even a new friend. But you're not gaining anything by just sitting around in your Technodrome proclaiming yourself too good to even interact with everyone. I'm not saying 'CLOSE YOUR EYES AND PICK ONE' or whatever. Unless literally every woman around you is too dumb to even see a movie with.
Hmm. It seems I was further off the mark than I thought. I agree with what you're saying, but don't really have anything else to say myself.
Really? I'd say it's one of the best ways to get to know someone for that expressed purpose. After all, I'm not giving advice to the guy on how to make friends.
Dating is horrible because nobody is honest while on a date. You don't act like your real self on a date. You're wearing a mask of some idealized version of yourself that you want the other person to see, and they're doing the same. Aside from learning superficial things like what they do for a living, whether they like dogs, what their hopes and dreams are, you're not going to learn anything meaningful about a person in this kind of setting. To really get to know someone you have to be their friend, see what they're like when they're not trying to impress you.
Rowan
131
post=203856
Dating is horrible because nobody is honest while on a date. You don't act like your real self on a date. You're wearing a mask of some idealized version of yourself that you want the other person to see, and they're doing the same. Aside from learning superficial things like what they do for a living, whether they like dogs, what their hopes and dreams are, you're not going to learn anything meaningful about a person in this kind of setting. To really get to know someone you have to be their friend, see what they're like when they're not trying to impress you.
As expected :P. A full review of the person before you score.
EDIT: I agree, but what's wrong with dating someone you already know and fully trust?
EDIT: I agree, but what's wrong with dating someone you already know and fully trust?
Absolutely nothing is wrong with that. All I'm saying is that there also isn't anything wrong with asking that cute girl that sits next to you in Economics class to some coffee, either.
How do you start the process of getting to know someone?
(...I suppose you could go on a date or something, and maybe have a few more, and over time become friends.)
(...I suppose you could go on a date or something, and maybe have a few more, and over time become friends.)
I'm not saying that dating is terrible and no one should ever do it, I'm just saying it's not a good way to know what someone is really like. I've also never met anyone who was too impatient to make friends.
I am not really sure how this topic became about dating.
I am not really sure how this topic became about dating.
post=203898
I'm not saying dating is terrible and no one should ever do it, I'm just saying it's not a good way to know what someone is really like. I've also never met anyone who was too impatient to make friends.
I am not really sure how this topic became about dating.
How does that make much sense, though? You're not going to know what someone is really like on ANY first or second encounter, whether your intention is dating or friendship or whatever. Whether you're dating someone or not, you're GOING to get to know them eventually given enough time.
Dating just cuts out the bullshit and gets straight to the point of it being a romantic encounter; sometimes I don't want to get to know a girl as friends, I want to date her. If we end up as friends, great, but I don't look at an attractive girl and go "Boy, I'd love to be her FRIEND and listen to her vent about her boyfriend and stuff!"
