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Alex Gets Oppai is a joke game meant to make a silly laugh at men's lowly desires for oppai. We needed a platforming foundation for our next major project, so we said "might as well make a stupid game out of it."

So there we have Alex Gets Oppai, an endless platformer.

In the world of Alex Gets Oppai, there are rumors stating that any man who can overcome the Sadistic Challenge and reach the heaven beyond the sky will be granted one wish by the Goddess of Sadism. Determined to achieve what he always desires the most, Alex decided to take on the Challenge. Will he ever be able to succeed?



  • Random blocks and boxes falling from the sky randomly. Be on top or be squashed.
  • Stupid and useless ninjas that kill you.
  • Oppai balls with extra points.





Press the Arrow Buttons to Move Alex or the cursor.


Press Spacebar to Jump.


Press Enter to Select Commands.

Latest Blog

Version 1.0c released!

Alex Gets Oppai version 1.0c has been released.

Changelog:
  • Fixed the 0xc000007b error.
  • Fixed compatibility issue with Windows XP
  • Heart Bubble is now positioned/displayed correctly
  • Completed
  • EvilEagles
  • SuppaYami
  • Custom
  • Action Platformer
  • 01/16/2014 06:19 AM
  • 03/01/2014 07:26 AM
  • 01/16/2014
  • 63037
  • 11
  • 402

Posts

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Ooh, a challenge! I think I need to get myself some oppai~<3
I get "not a valid win32 application" :<
Ratty524
The 524 is for 524 Stone Crabs
12986
author=Housekeeping
I hate that you guys made me look up the word "oppai," and I feel ten percent nerdier for knowing its definition.

Same here.

I detected BS with this game btw:


It was still pretty fun overall, though it took me a few tries to get used to. I hate how you can't wall-jump off the beams at the edge of the screen, yet you can do so on any other block.

This was my highscore, I think Fomar kicked all of our asses:
Thanks you guys for playing :D

author=Ratty524
I detected BS with this game btw:
That's why it takes some strategies to not ever be stuck like that :P

author=Ratty524
I hate how you can't wall-jump off the beams at the edge of the screen, yet you can do so on any other block.

You realize this would enable cheating right? Give me more credits on the design decisions will ya? :<
Ratty524
The 524 is for 524 Stone Crabs
12986
To my knowledge, the blocks fall from relatively random positions and at a fast rate from the ceiling, making the situation a little more of a result of bad luck rather than an error in playstyle. As the game in general is arcade-hard, though, I'll cut you some slack. It only happened to me once, anyway.

In regards to the wall-jumping, it just comes off as a weird inconsistency to me. Like, you can wall jump from ICE yet you can't on beams? Even an infinitely long column of butter would have been a bit more convincing. Also, considering the above points in regards how those blocks fall... I really don't think it would make the game THAT easy. Or hell... You'd know how this game works better than I would!
I totally see where you're coming from in regards of the beams on the sides. I'm aware of the inconsistency but it's rather a counter measure to prevent people from abusing them to drag the screen upwards (when you reach a certain height on the playscreen, the parallax will scroll up) but at the same time lend them a hand in situations where they need to buy some time (as Alex can still slide slowly down those beams).

But yeah, those are indeed legit issues. It's just that I wasn't able to figure out a better approach. Many thanks for the input!
Ratty524
The 524 is for 524 Stone Crabs
12986
Heh, I get it now.

What engine did you use to develop this, by the way?
author=NewBlack
I get "not a valid win32 application" :<

Yeah I think it has some problem with Windows XP, don't know why but I will try to fix it ASAP :(

author=Ratty524
Heh, I get it now.

What engine did you use to develop this, by the way?

We use Love2D :D
author=Ratty524
To my knowledge, the blocks fall from relatively random positions and at a fast rate from the ceiling, making the situation a little more of a result of bad luck rather than an error in playstyle. As the game in general is arcade-hard, though, I'll cut you some slack. It only happened to me once, anyway.


Didn't your mother ever tell you not to crawl into holes you're unfamiliar with for too long?
author=NewBlack
I get "not a valid win32 application" :<

Fixed xD
author=Ratty524
To my knowledge, the blocks fall from relatively random positions and at a fast rate from the ceiling, making the situation a little more of a result of bad luck rather than an error in playstyle. As the game in general is arcade-hard, though, I'll cut you some slack. It only happened to me once, anyway.
What exactly is the alternative? An algorithm that detects if a falling block would create a trap? That doesn't sound feasible.

It is an error in your play style, because you need to be aware of your position and avoid those areas. The blocks don't fall so fast that a house can be built around you before you have a chance to move.

In regards to the wall-jumping, it just comes off as a weird inconsistency to me. Like, you can wall jump from ICE yet you can't on beams? Even an infinitely long column of butter would have been a bit more convincing. Also, considering the above points in regards how those blocks fall... I really don't think it would make the game THAT easy. Or hell... You'd know how this game works better than I would!
Breasts fall from the sky. I think we can suspend logic for a little while. Ice also doesn't instantly melt when you touch it.

You get score from reaching new heights in the level. If you could get height from wall jumping it would be a cheap way to get score and the method to getting high score would be boring and circumvent the whole concept of the game.

----



Hmm, interesting. Once you hit around 100k, the game changes drastically. It actually becomes REALLY EASY xD Getting those 200k+ scores seems like a much less impressive feat now! (if you have quick reflexes)

A 100k+ run.

The key is to keep moving and memorize the timing of blocks falling and jump when they fall. Also, stay near a ledge of a high up block so you can easily walk off the ledge to safety. Never stand in the middle of any flat surface. Oh, and stay near the bottom of the stage as much as possible.
You should eventually port this on over for mobile and tablet devices so I can get my Oppai fix wherever I go.

And thanks for introducing me to a brand new term that I never heard about until just now. Thanks, guys. This game is fun, addicting – and educational! :D
Ratty524
The 524 is for 524 Stone Crabs
12986
You know, the reason I took notice of this game was because it had the same ring as "Pom Gets Wifi"... Was this intentional?
author=Addit
You should eventually port this on over for mobile and tablet devices so I can get my Oppai fix wherever I go.

Ahahaha that'd be a whole lot more work for something we made just for fun ;3; but thanks a ton for the interests!

author=Ratty524
You know, the reason I took notice of this game was because it had the same ring as "Pom Gets Wifi"... Was this intentional?

I wonder~


Boobies! I love them! Ah! Boobies! Boobies! Oh!
Okay, I'm done . . . *runs away in shame*
This is totally the place to post about everything mammary ever.
Decky
I'm a dog pirate
19645
Oppai are...cherries, right? They kinda look like cherries!
author=Deckiller
Oppai are...cherries, right? They kinda look like cherries!

... Probably shouldn't have added the bra >_>;
author=EvilEagles
Yay it's finally up! :D
That's what she said!

Oppai will do that.
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