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RELATIONS WITH THE GENDER OF YOUR PREFERENCE

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I agree with some other posters who have said that you are not "using" someone for sex if they are also "using" you for sex. There are plenty of girls at bars who just want a good ol' fashioned good time. I don't know a lot of girls who expect to meet their future spouse at a bar anyway, though it could definitely happen.

Also, meaningful sex can absolutely be fulfilling, when you do it correctly. But I guess your issue is you've never met anyone who "fulfills" you.

I hope you give people who you feel are "below your standards" a shot one day. Someone might genuinely surprise you.
halibabica
RMN's Official Reviewmonger
16948
author=aprilschild link=topic=2473.msg45346#msg45346 date=1227029193
I hope you give people who you feel are "below your standards" a shot one day. Someone might genuinely surprise you.
It's not so much a standard as it is criteria for getting along with me. I'd like someone on or around my intellectual level (oy, that sounds pompous), but as long as they don't have $h!+ for brains and have similar interests, it could work out. But, I only met one like that, and she moved away a long time ago...
Max McGee
with sorrow down past the fence
9159
I still don't make real friends easily, and it made me hard to even talk to when still single. Plus who picks up girls in the manga section of the library reading overly cute shoujo AKA Cardcaptor Sakura? XD Or the handheld section of the local Gamestop? You guys don't look at girls out of high school buying the newest Pokemon title, do you? Doubtful. I'm not the typical guy's target by any strech of the imagination. I resigned myself to that and stuck to my escape, my gaming. At least I could adventure in gaming, see stories books never write about, and feel free of being that outcast. In an RPG, I'm not me - I'm the hero of that story. *shrug*

Actually when I was single whenever I saw any girl (who was actually PHYSICALLY ATTRACTIVE, that's a big qualifier I should add) doing something openly geeky like sitting in the middle of a Borders aisle reading manga my heart was aflutter because I was like, holy shit, I could get with her, she's accessible because she's also a geek. i.e. that would be exactly the kind of girl I'd have recognized as a "target". But I mean, if the girl was reading some awful shit like cardcaptor sakura I doubt I could find much to talk with her about after all unless I was like really desperate. :P

Also...for totally unrelated reasons having nothing to do with relationships, that sad, sad, sad bolded text is basically how I feel about my life. :'(

And, apparently, Issac Newton John Stuart Mill. I'm of the opinion that sex is one of the more basic pleasures in life, and that there are things that can be done that are far more fulfilling.

Harsh alert. You have no fucking idea what you're talking about because you are a fucking virgin. A celibate person saying that sex isn't fun means as much as someone who is straight edge saying that drinking isn't fun, someone who's never smoked pot saying that smoking pot isn't fun, or someone who never tried video games saying that video games aren't fun. I.E. ABSOLUTELY NOTHING.

Nothing personal hali but I can't stand this attitude and like 100% of the people who have it are clueless virgins who will be fucking heartbroken when they realize what they were missing when they finally get laid. It'll be kind of like peter griffin farting for the first time at the age of 22 or whatever. I know THAT's not a sexy image.
Harsh alert. You have no fucking idea what you're talking about because you are a fucking virgin. A celibate person saying that sex isn't fun means as much as someone who is straight edge saying that drinking isn't fun, someone who's never smoked pot saying that smoking pot isn't fun, or someone who never tried video games saying that video games aren't fun. I.E. ABSOLUTELY NOTHING.

Nothing personal hali but I can't stand this attitude and like 100% of the people who have it are clueless virgins who will be fucking heartbroken when they realize what they were missing when they finally get laid. It'll be kind of like peter griffin farting for the first time at the age of 22 or whatever. I know THAT's not a sexy image.

As pretentious as this may sound this is 110% correct. I mean seriously there is no better way of putting it than this.
Max McGee
with sorrow down past the fence
9159
Yeah, again, I'm really sorry for my tone. If it makes you feel any better I have often given the same speech to vegetarians only being mad at them for not eating meat. ;D
Confusing in the wording, but I sympathize Rasta
author=Max McGee link=topic=2473.msg45360#msg45360 date=1227034483
You have no fucking idea what you're talking about because you are a fucking virgin. A celibate person saying that sex isn't fun means as much as someone who is straight edge saying that drinking isn't fun, someone who's never smoked pot saying that smoking pot isn't fun--
...
If it makes you feel any better I have often given the same speech to vegetarians only being mad at them for not eating meat. ;D
Fucking christ. God forbid someone having different priorities.
No, it's more of there's only so much of an opinion you can have about something that you have never experienced.
WIP
I'm not comfortable with any idea that can't be expressed in the form of men's jewelry
11363
I think people are being far too concrete about opinions. I have never taken a small puppy and suffocated it inside a pool of green jello. It may be fun, it may not. From my personal perception, it wouldn't. Can my opinion change? Sure. But I don't think it is an example of something I need to experience first to create an opinion on.

I believe there have been studies that shows the brain's ability to judge things based upon past experiences and estimating how well you would enjoy it. Your brain is not always right, but you cannot fault a person entirely for having an assumption and sticking with it.
author=WIP link=topic=2473.msg45381#msg45381 date=1227038635
I think people are being far too concrete about opinions. I have never taken a small puppy and suffocated it inside a pool of green jello. It may be fun, it may not. From my personal perception, it wouldn't. Can my opinion change? Sure. But I don't think it is an example of something I need to experience first to create an opinion on.

I believe there have been studies that shows the brain's ability to judge things based upon past experiences and estimating how well you would enjoy it. Your brain is not always right, but you cannot fault a person entirely for having an assumption and sticking with it.

Invalid. You're comparing apples and oranges here. We're talking about SEX, after all.

Assumptions are one thing. Nothing tops actual experience when it comes to forming a believable, concrete and insightful opinion regarding something. Who would you say has a better understanding of plumbing and thus can provide better insight, an actual plumber or some kid who has never fixed anything in his entire life?

Besides. Sex is really something you have to experience in order to have a truly valid opinion regarding it. If someone who never played a videogame you love comes up to you and says "that game SUCKS", would you truly consider his opinion valid?

Don't make me laugh, now!


Addendum: Ever notice the opinion that "sex sucks" or "sex isn't worth the effort" or "I have better things to do with my time" is almost always held by some pseudo intellectual who has too much of an ego for their own good? That's how they perpetuate the stereotype that nerds are un-layable.
Max McGee
with sorrow down past the fence
9159
I understand in general what WIP is saying but I still don't think that "sex" and "drowning puppies" is a particularly valid comparison.

Addendum: Ever notice the opinion that "sex sucks" or "sex isn't worth the effort" or "I have better things to do with my time" is almost always held by some pseudo intellectual who has too much of an ego for their own good? That's how they perpetuate the stereotype that nerds are un-layable.

No, actually. The only correlation I noticed is that these opinions are almost always held by virgins.
Actually, it's really just the intellectual virgins. The "regular" virgins don't tend to be so negative about it. They're more hopeful and craving it than rejectful and hating it, like the former.
author=Asalieri link=topic=2473.msg45394#msg45394 date=1227042160
Actually, it's really just the intellectual virgins. The "regular" virgins don't tend to be so negative about it. They're more hopeful and craving it than rejectful and hating it, like the former.
How was anyone being hateful? There's a difference between not wanting sex for the sake of sex and having an overall animosity toward the idea.
"sex is overrated"

That's a rather hostile/resetful-sounding answer for having come from someone who hasn't tried it.

That's akin to animosity.
harmonic
It's like toothpicks against a tank
4142
Sex is freaking awesome. I feel sorry for those who haven't had it, or feel it's not all that great.
halibabica
RMN's Official Reviewmonger
16948
Touche. I understand what you guys are saying, and no, I don't have any experience to back up my opinions on the matter. It still doesn't change how I feel about it, though.

The truth is, I have too much respect for women to just try and get in their pants. Call me what you will, but it's my belief and I'm not forcing it on you guys.

Is sex great? Probably, I've never tried it. Is there more to life than sex? Without a doubt.
author=halibabica link=topic=2473.msg45429#msg45429 date=1227048056
The truth is, I have too much respect for women to just try and get in their pants.

As I've addressed before, I think you guys have a really strange outlook on women.

Women, or at least 80% of the girls in my acquaintance and myself, do not run and hide at the mention of intercourse. Nor are we blushing feebs who would look at some dude in a club who is grinding on us and say "oh gee, he seems like a really nice guy, I bet he just wants a cup of coffee." Hopefully you'd be trying to get with women your age, and women your age are not naive 13-year-old delicate flowers who need to be misled into having sex.

Golly.

It is not underhanded nor decietful to hit on a woman. It is not morally reprehensible to want to get with a woman. We are not retards, children, or animals. WE KNOW WHAT IS UP.

Of course, it is wrong to sleep with a woman after promising her something (i.e. a long term relationship) and then dumping her. It is also wrong to sleep with a girl who is too drunk to know any better. Also wrong, any form of rape.

Barring lies and rape, though, sex between adults is not immoral. We are not being "used," and I resent the implication that girls are too stupid to understand the difference between sex and love.
author=halibabica link=topic=2473.msg45429#msg45429 date=1227048056
Touche. I understand what you guys are saying, and no, I don't have any experience to back up my opinions on the matter. It still doesn't change how I feel about it, though.

The truth is, I have too much respect for women to just try and get in their pants. Call me what you will, but it's my belief and I'm not forcing it on you guys.

Is sex great? Probably, I've never tried it. Is there more to life than sex? Without a doubt.

The bolded sentence is the only part that doesn't make sense to me. Why is it assumed that if someone enjoys sex as much as the next guy, that it automatically means that all you could POSSIBLY care about when dealing with the opposite sex is getting in their pants? And why would having sex with someone automatically mean you don't respect them??

Edit: April's post too. It's kinda offensive to women to treat them like innocent lesser beings that aren't to be trifled with!

harmonic
It's like toothpicks against a tank
4142
author=halibabica link=topic=2473.msg45429#msg45429 date=1227048056
The truth is, I have too much respect for women to just try and get in their pants.

I see your point of view, but somehow I doubt there are any guys here who are like that. I really don't think wanting to have sex with someone = having less respect for them.
If It helps his case any I have a similar view on things. But that is rooted elsewhere and won't go there.

I respect women a lot, it is not a belief that they are lesser beings it is a belief of myself being lesser or something the that extent. That being said I am also an all around nice guy and get used an dizzying amount.