RELATIONS WITH THE GENDER OF YOUR PREFERENCE

Being 15 and a socially inept nerd, I've never had a girlfriend. I probably won't for a while, but that's really fine. I'll let it come to me.

That's really a good attitude to have, man, not even kidding! Just let it come to you, just live life and enjoy yourself in the meantime.

author=brandonabley link=topic=2473.msg45710#msg45710 date=1227109813
I don't appreciate the hostile attitude that most of you hve towards people that aren't interested in sex. I am not interested in sex and I do not enjoy it. I think it is a pain in the ass (gay sex is especially but that's only about half the time). Almost always when I have sex it is to show my partner that I care about her and while I am patient and take my time to make sure it is good for her, I am glad when it is over. It is comparable to giving a long and intimate massage - it isn't really that fun to do but it's something a person will put up with if they love someone.

Honestly, when she is too tired and would rather go to sleep, I feel relieved.

You guys are claiming only virgins feel this way. I am not a virgin. I have had sex hundreds of times; I have had sex with lovers, with girlfriends I was lukewarm about, casually with a friend, and once, with a complete stranger.

I am not a mutant. I've never been raped. I have no sexual trauma haunting me. I just don't enjoy sex! I am only in it for the emotional connection. Is it too hard for you guys to imagine a person like that?

No I totally believe you and I have no vindication or reservations towards you or your attitude towards sex!

It just isn't normal.

I don't appreciate the hostile attitude that most of you hve towards people that aren't interested in sex. I am not interested in sex and I do not enjoy it. I think it is a pain in the ass (gay sex is especially but that's only about half the time). Almost always when I have sex it is to show my partner that I care about her and while I am patient and take my time to make sure it is good for her, I am glad when it is over. It is comparable to giving a long and intimate massage - it isn't really that fun to do but it's something a person will put up with if they love someone.

Honestly, when she is too tired and would rather go to sleep, I feel relieved.

You guys are claiming only virgins feel this way. I am not a virgin. I have had sex hundreds of times; I have had sex with lovers, with girlfriends I was lukewarm about, casually with a friend, and once, with a complete stranger.

I am not a mutant. I've never been raped. I have no sexual trauma haunting me. I just don't enjoy sex! I am only in it for the emotional connection. Is it too hard for you guys to imagine a person like that?

Sorry, I did not mean to sound aggressive or hostile. It was mostly the virgins who are rationalizing their inability to get laid with "lol sex isn't that great" that I take issue with. Your situation is entirely different.

And that's WEIRD man. Not abberant, not wrong, not damaged or psychotic in any way, just garden variety WEIRD.

Anyway, I have a question for those of you who are not Americans, but I don't know how you would answer it, since you probably don't know what it's like in America. I was going to ask is it easier or harder to meet girls/get laid in your country than in America, but since you've probably never lived in America, let me rephrase that:

How hard or easy is it to meet girls or hook up with girls in your country? Because I have a feeling that in some places it might be very different than the experience of trying to meet people/dating in America.

author=Max McGee link=topic=2473.msg45770#msg45770 date=1227121478

Show

(I know...because you told me in far too much fucking detail...about at least one sexual experience you REALLY enjoyed, unless you were just yanking my chain. All I will say is it involved a web cam.)

Hahahahahahahah

Yeah that really happened. <3

Maybe . . . I am a mutant . . .

EDIT: Maaaaaan I forgot all about that. Yes that was a very very unusual night.

EDIT 2: Jesus Christ Max I had forgotten all about that incident and now I can't stop thinking about it.

EDIT 3: I am sorry to burden you :(

EDIT 4: Now I kind of want to do it again.

author=TooManyToasters link=topic=2473.msg45747#msg45747 date=1227114480
Being 15 and a socially inept nerd, I've never had a girlfriend. I probably won't for a while, but that's really fine. I'll let it come to me.

This is the most rational statement i've heard since this thread began!

author=brandonabley link=topic=2473.msg45710#msg45710 date=1227109813
I don't appreciate the hostile attitude that most of you hve towards people that aren't interested in sex.

I am not interested in sex and I do not enjoy it. I think it is a pain in the ass (gay sex is especially but that's only about half the time). Almost always when I have sex it is to show my partner that I care about her and while I am patient and take my time to make sure it is good for her, I am glad when it is over. It is comparable to giving a long and intimate massage - it isn't really that fun to do but it's something a person will put up with if they love someone.

Honestly, when she is too tired and would rather go to sleep, I feel relieved.

You guys are claiming only virgins feel this way. I am not a virgin. I have had sex hundreds of times; I have had sex with lovers, with girlfriends I was lukewarm about, casually with a friend, and once, with a complete stranger.

I am not a mutant. I've never been raped. I have no sexual trauma haunting me. I just don't enjoy sex! I am only in it for the emotional connection. Is it too hard for you guys to imagine a person like that?

Your position on this is more valid than those who have not had sex because, you have in fact had sex and have decided that it isn't your favorite thing. From a biological standpoint this might be weird, or it might not be, who knows. But the big issue I think most people have with virgins saying "sex is lame" is that they don't have any way to know for sure.

It's the same issue I have with people saying "that movie/game/book sucked" without having seen/played/read it. You can't make real or valid critiques of something you know nothing about.

And as for :

author=NoblemanNick link=topic=2473.msg45883#msg45883 date=1227136892

author=Asalieri link=topic=2473.msg45840#msg45840 date=1227130977

author=TooManyToasters link=topic=2473.msg45747#msg45747 date=1227114480
Being 15 and a socially inept nerd, I've never had a girlfriend. I probably won't for a while, but that's really fine. I'll let it come to me.

This is the most rational statement i've heard since this thread began!

I am like that also

This is great, for one big reason. The weird rule of obtaining a partner is as long as you are not desperate for it, it's MUCH easier to do!

This is why many people will note that, after getting married/being in a long-term relationship, women/men seem to flock to them in a way that never happened before they entered a relationship. This is because lots of times, people get more confident/less desperate after having been with someone, so they are automatically more attractive.

Just stay cool with who you are, and someone will come along! I for one maintain that "socially inept nerds" make better boyfriends because they won't ever take you for granted, and they are intelligent people who can hold down good conversations.

author=TooManyToasters link=topic=2473.msg45747#msg45747 date=1227114480
Being 15 and a socially inept nerd, I've never had a girlfriend. I probably won't for a while, but that's really fine. I'll let it come to me.

I'm 17, been in a few relationships turned out bad, this is my attitude now. It's just not worth it for me to actively look at this stage.

author=aprilschild link=topic=2473.msg45884#msg45884 date=1227137030
This is great, for one big reason. The weird rule of obtaining a partner is as long as you are not desperate for it, it's MUCH easier to do!

This is why many people will note that, after getting married/being in a long-term relationship, women/men seem to flock to them in a way that never happened before they entered a relationship. This is because lots of times, people get more confident/less desperate after having been with someone, so they are automatically more attractive.

Just stay cool with who you are, and someone will come along! I for one maintain that "socially inept nerds" make better boyfriends because they won't ever take you for granted, and they are intelligent people who can hold down good conversations.

I must also agree on that from experience :P

However I never had someone come to me (though my first gf assured me that on the day I approached her, she was thinking on getting to me as well) and shy as I was it was a real challenge to get to someone.

And well since we are talking about things like that, let me let out a bit on my feelings right now :P

First I always been one to be quite closed to myself about feelings and specially touch, be it simple hugs or anything, whenever my mom or anyone approached I went away saying it is a thing between couples only (no one ever said that to me and it was always a damn mystery as to why I had that mindset ever since I can remember). With that and all the rejection from being albino (here in Brasil it is not common) for being a nerd and for being to skinny got me into being outcast.

This generated a lot of needs and dreams related to relationships which just got worse each time I was reject by someone I liked and I was stuck in a cycle. Then I got more confidence, had my first relationship and others followed since even with more confidence I still felt bad being "alone". Everytime a relationship ended I was sad for a while then already trying know someone else.

Now with my last relationship I discovered a lot about myself and things I truly value, mainly because even though my ex gf and I shared some common interests, we had a lot of differences and I want to do things with her so she wouldn´t feel unloved, however with that I sacrificed doing things I really wanted to do and learned to value then. Also thanks to her I learned that if I risked a bit, I could earn at least a decent amount of money working on something I enjoy (selling my art on comissions or working for sites).

However this caused a divergence of ways between us: with my current route I still don´t earn a lot, just enough for my basic expenses like internet, college, transport, food and I want to work like this until I get a more safe job doing so, or until I get good enough to earn more as I work and I know it may take time. She on the other hand wants to work on whatever she can to get money to leave her home as soon as possible. Both this divergence and the divergence in interests lead us to grow apart until we agreed peacefully on a break up which I believe was good for both.

NOW, while I have a lot of time for myself, for RM, to see my dad, to spend with my classmates, to build my robot/mecha model kits and play videogames, I still feel a bit lonely, maybe it is an habit that grew with so many years stuck on the stupid mindset that I needed someone to be happy, wich I consciously know is not a truth. However it still gets to me sometimes.

Also thanks to that last relationship I learnt to be more open on my feelings and on touching and hugging friends and to that my classmates have been really sweet.

I am working as hard as possible for all my clients too and building a lot of kits. Yet I don´t feel 100% okay all the time, which is more of why I am letting it out, as much as for anyone else I try to look like an emotional armored tank...

Yeah, not feeling baaaad but not feeling top either, just feeling kinda strange and a bit afraid of bumping into someone interesting without being exactly "on top" with myself o.o Maybe I am too worried, but I am making a huge effort to leave it be and focus on all the other wonderfull stuff (including RMN and the great friends I have here).

whew, no idea if anyonw will bother to read all that XD

Yeah, just like I was on my teens and funny enough, I used to associate days, months or years based on things I did in games (even though until I played Chrono Trigger first time I just played Vice Project doom (nes) and megaman tittles :P). I also remember that I cried both in the ending for Chrono Trigger and FF6 saying goodbye to my friends in the game (well in CT the tears always started with Robo, I have this thing for A.Is with feelings, maybe I don´t think it is fair to created a sentient machine to be just a servant to humans...).

But yeah, so many people I´ve met, both as friends and girlfriends, helped me gain confidence and showed me some good things about myself and about life and I have always been attracted to girls more troubled than me so I could protect and get them up.

I think it was half the reason that ended driving me to my last girlfriend, she was also all hurt and lacked confidence, specially regarding her looks and I really hope that our time together has helped her feel better about herself as it did for me.

As for sex: Definitivelly, as I said before, to me it is way more fulfilling when there is deep feelings involved. Sex alone was not nearly as wonderful as in a relationship, it was just not something bad that left me any guilt (though the circunstances really helped and a friendship formed when I had it one night only for once). All in all it also served to see the difference.

Now what you just said about Asa made me think about some lyrics from shoujo anime openings :D (Not bad, I tend to be rather sensitive towards those things, specially anything Nanoha related hehe) And seriously, I think it was really nice and loving of him to be patient towards your fears =^.^=

Also to note: I woke feeling a lot better since I wrote all that last night :P

author=Clest link=topic=2473.msg46031#msg46031 date=1227184355
I have this thing for A.Is with feelings

Tried asking KOS-MOS out yet?