THE SCREENSHOT TOPIC RETURNS

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author=Kp
Hi it's me.




You are Henri, an innoncent little boy who's looking for his missing dad.
author=Kp
Hi it's me.
Holy crap if that's the son how huge is the dad's head?
benos
My mind is full of fuck.
624


Okay, he sounds a little too gangster. Even for a playboy. :p
The bunch of ellipses aren't necessary. (That's the name of the dots) They're supposed to denote either a sentence trailing off into nothing or a wait (that's what most people use them for in dialogue situations).
If you want a break between the two sentences (which really isn't necessary in this case) you have the stopping power of the mighty ! and ? already. You could also move the Whaddya think you're doing with my gal? line to the next line instead of starting on the top one.
Also, you're instead of you. (You are = you're)
benos
My mind is full of fuck.
624
Yeah, I did fix that when I soon realized it. Not final. The sentence did trail using the text commands. It's just the full message.
I personally find it kind of annoying when a game places a pause at the end of every sentence, unless the text already scrolls pretty fast and the pause is really negligible. I'd recommend saving pauses for when you want to really emphasize something -- at all other times, just let the player read at their pace. They'll fill in the rhythm of regular speech themselves.
...I meant pauses in reading. When a stopper is placed at the end of a sentence (periods, exclamation marks, question marks) our mind counts it as a pause. It's something that's taught to us from a young age so most people don't notice it, but those punctuation marks denote a pause or breath in the text. (Especially noticeable when reading text aloud.)

Though there's nothing wrong with a good old \. which will stop the text for half a second, not long at all and definitely useful in some cases. Not in the case of the above text, though, as the sentences are meant to be read one after the other, else they'd feel disconnected.
benos
My mind is full of fuck.
624
Danny: Stop right there! What
do you think you're doing with
my gal?




This good? I know the stops are meant for thinking, but
I properly overused it. I'll check for all those \.....etc

Now he has to pay the fine, go to jail or resist arrest.

Danny: Stop right there! What're
you doing with my gal?


Properly this one.
Sup guys wondering if anybody would give me feed back on these first screenshots of a game i'm making called "Streets of the Undead" its a survival horror game. Tell me if its atmospheric or not and tell me if you see anything wrong with the mapping thank you.
LockeZ
I'd really like to get rid of LockeZ. His play style is way too unpredictable. He's always like this too. If he ran a country, he'd just kill and imprison people at random until crime stopped.
5958
Maybe it's slightly better while animated, and I'm sure it'd be better on my home computer, but looking at the screenshot on my work computer I literally can't tell the difference between the ground and the walls. Almost everything in the screenshot is solid black. I can make out most of the objects if I stare hard enough but it's really really dark. I don't think "can't figure out where I can and can't walk" is particularly scary personally so I would recommend brightening it a little and/or reducing that ridiculous level of smoke.

I certainly can't comment on the mapping, on account of the fact that it's basically invisible.

Why does the title screen say "Streets of the Unueau"
Its actually the tileset's that are dark i darken the contrast of them to give off a horror look. It actually does say undead its just the graffiti font i'm using makes the top of the "D" small so you cant see it unless you zoom in.
LockeZ
I'd really like to get rid of LockeZ. His play style is way too unpredictable. He's always like this too. If he ran a country, he'd just kill and imprison people at random until crime stopped.
5958
I would pick a different font, or at least edit the image to turn those two Ds sideways so they actually look like Ds, because "undead" is kind of the important key word in the title, and it'll be bad if people see a banner for your game and can't read it
Eh its graffiti most of the time people cant read it anyway and that's what makes it unique lol. The game is set in the 90s with a graffiti artist by the name of "shadow" he wakes up in his apartment to find all his apartment complex floors and rooms are over runned with zombies and he has to escape. The outbreak is caused by a new drug and unfortunately shadow lives in the ghetto of NYC.
InfectionFiles
the world ends in whatever my makerscore currently is
4622
Having the tileset dark is fine, but you should really reduce the fog/smoke.
Or add fires, so it makes sense. And if you do that, make the fire give off some light when close to it.
Nobody is going to play a game where you can't see anything, no matter what your excuse. Also the excuse that it is graffiti and people usually can't read it anyway has got to be the worst excuse ever. It's not even graffiti, it's a font you got somewhere. I suggest you fix it.
It looks that your graffiti was made with Photoshop. Take the text layer and rasterize it. Duplicate it. Apply a mild (about 5 px) Gaussian blur filter to the bottom text layer, and set its blending mode to Soft light. Set the upper text layer to Soft Light as well.

It will look more natural.
I'm sure you could find a good font that's done in the style of actual graffiti. I mean, www.dafont.com HAS to have about 100 different kinds.
@InfectionFiles Didn't say i wasn't going to address the brightness thing i am and plus that little room will only be seen in a cut scene at the start of the game it isn't even explorable. @SnowOwl Wow you don't have to be a dick calm down and of course its a font sherlock its a font inspired by graffiti. @MrCharlesMugford Pretty sure that's where i got this font i searched graffiti and this was the one i liked the most but i will change it since i have to please other people on this site.
Figured I'd show two screenies this time~





Think I should remove the Energy, and Aether from the parameter info column? (Seems slightly..unnecessary now that I look at it, since it's already shown up above with gauges. :3) Also, I just love chibi Xear(dude in the screenies), lol..idk why. :x
Ok... I finally put the border on the battle hud, but the face itself is a little smaller, as expected. How is it? :D