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Whistle Whale You Work

Ever played a game and thought to yourself "I feel like I've played this before"? Yeah, that's Mission Whaled in a nutshell. What Mission Whaled is is a game that takes itself about as seriously as Pom Gets Wi-Fi, which is to say not at all. The overall bonkersness that this game has to offer is ramped up past eleven and goes straight on til morning. If at any point you feel like you've lost sight of what's important or that nothing seems to make sense anymore, rest assured it never made sense to start off with and just keep on pushing forward.

Essentially the story is as such: you're a group of people who wants blessings from the Whale of Time so you go out in search of blessings. Then the story shifts over to a bunch of villains who plan on injecting the Whale of Time with laxatives to make "its tummy hurts", which is to say they intend on causing bodily harm to it. The heroes stop the villains before waking up inside the Whale. They slowly reconnect with each other and have to fight one of their own, leading to the end of the game. While they're fighting their friend/final boss, two of the party members get married and go off on a honeymoon.

In all honesty, you're not missing anything when it comes to games like these because they're mostly just stream of conscious affairs (which is to say, much like this review). I only took a few notes while playing this (it's only about half an hour of gameplay, anyway) and most of them read out as snaps at the different characters. I'll be including these notes later on under a hide tag, so make sure to check them out when you can.

The music is probably default to RPG Maker MV (I've never actually seen that program's RTP) while there are a few that are remakes of some RM2k3 themes. The mapping in town is pretty solid while the interior of the Whale of Time is all over the place. The dialogue is complete nonsense and the characters do whatever feels right for them. The combat is extremely easy if you play to each character's strengths (using Dance with Astaroshe and hard hitting skills and party heals with everyone else) It's standard to poor on my scale and therefore deserves a 2 out of 5.

I'm still looking for a game like this that's silly while still having a decent amount of effort put into it so that even when the jokes don't deliver it's still a worthwhile experience. I guess I'll have to keep looking. C'est la vie.

• Astaroshe's doll is old and rugged. Astaroshe's doll could do with a shave.
• Gordon is a rough customer.
• Asta and Shibe- I mean, Sebastian and the quest for many dolls.
• Doggo Mask; only for Sebastian... You don't say.
• Cookie wants to be tumblr famous. Cookie should talk to Pewdiepie first.
• If you leave the Cookie Domain and walk back in, all the party members are back. Cool bug.