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--Lets Watch Star Trek for the First Time! [The Original Series]
ep 59 – "The Paradise Syndrome" (★★)
Oh noooo a Native Americans as childlike culture plotline. Lets-a-go I suppose.
As an episode its serviceable – it isn't as dreary as The Deadly Years or takes ages off your life like Assingment: Earth. Its just you know this plotline, we all know how it goes. Kirk is mistaken for a god, which he rolls with because he has amnesia, Spock and the crew divert the asteroid threatening the planet, and all is tied up in the end. Its not as though native american actors can't be in a star trek or play these kinds of rolls, its that native americans cannot be divorced from the trappings of their heritage or be given much dignity or solemnity that makes this uncomfortable; it feels very manipulative. I must impress again that I am not a sociologist. This look into the choice of following the path of duty and advancement or living a life of simplicity was already dealt with, and with far more aplomb, in This Side of Paradise.
It does introduce us to the concept of the Preservers, an ancient alien race that scooped up cultures in danger of extinction and repopulated them on new habitable worlds. That's a pretty interesting idea that I hope gets explored further; looking at other relics they may have left behind and whether or not their intentions were benevolent. Here they use it as their justification for why there's so many humanoids running around the galaxy. Hasn't bothered me!
ep 60 – "And the Children Shall Lead" (★★★)
OKAY MOTHERFUCKERS LETS DO SOME RESEARCH
This episode was written by one Edward J. Lasko. Miri was written by Adrian Spies. The Squire of Gothos was written by Paul Schneider. And Charlie X was written by Gene Roddenberry himself. So it seems that my inital assumption was slightly mistaken: MULTIPLE writers had a phobia of children! (Or at least in Gene's case, had a lot to say about the terror of pre-pubesence when unchecked and unguided)
There's a real poignancy here underneath all the cheese. These children are being manipulated, but what does that mean exactly? The episode makes it appear as though the ignorance of these kids is what is being abused but we've clearly demonstrated that the Gorgon is an alien with the power to control minds: It controls the children, and the children control the crew. The gorgon wants to travel to the earth colony to "recruit" more people and raise an army of subservient followers with himself at the top. Its very reminiscent of a pyramid scheme hence the gorgons being a race of marauders and pirates. The adults on the planet conducting the archaeological dig were with time able to pick up on and resist the mind-control. The gorgon deliberately went after the weakest and most susceptible targets, using them to kill the more strong-willed. Its chilling stuff. The ending is bittersweet when the children are finally able to grieve for the deaths, and themselves. I totally understand if people can't take this episode seriously, but it works for me.
ep 61 – "Is There in Truth No Beauty" (★★★★)
First gorgons and now medusas? This show about the future takes a lot of inspiration from the past!
An ambassador that drives you MAAAAD when you look upon him would not be high on my personal consideration to draft into an episode but I'm pleasantly surprised at how they executed it. The ambassador himself does not feature into the episode heavily: The story's really an examination of Dr. Miranda Jones and her relationships, as well as the social forces that attempt to pigenhole her.
There's a scene which is uncomfortable but also what makes it very good: When Kirk confronts Jones during her failed attempts to ressecutate Spock. She's willing to give up and declare him a lost cause but Kirk won't back down and tries to play the psychologist, blaming her for Spock's condition and passionately declaring she doesn't want Spock to recover on account for her jealousy of his mind-meld with the ambassador. Later he confesses to McCoy that maybe he never should have spoken to her, and maybe he let Spock die because Jones couldn't hear the truth.
But the episode plays all of this very ambiguously. Kirk might not only have been mistaken to enter the room and speak with her (against McCoy's recommendation) but totally mistaken to her motives. We never find out if that's how she actually felt, we only have Kirk's word and Jones herself is inscrutable on the matter. The whole episode most of the male crewmen have their idea of what a woman should desire and who Dr. Jones is, but are only able to appreciate her point of view superficially. They respect her, but only her aspects that they relate to. Dunno if any of what I just said was intended or even there at all, but that's what I took away from it. This is a good'un in my book.
That is a terrible title though. We're a far cry from the poeticism of City on the Edge of Forever. Perhaps not best episode, but best title by far. Maybe you disagree?
Oh noooo a Native Americans as childlike culture plotline. Lets-a-go I suppose.
As an episode its serviceable – it isn't as dreary as The Deadly Years or takes ages off your life like Assingment: Earth. Its just you know this plotline, we all know how it goes. Kirk is mistaken for a god, which he rolls with because he has amnesia, Spock and the crew divert the asteroid threatening the planet, and all is tied up in the end. Its not as though native american actors can't be in a star trek or play these kinds of rolls, its that native americans cannot be divorced from the trappings of their heritage or be given much dignity or solemnity that makes this uncomfortable; it feels very manipulative. I must impress again that I am not a sociologist. This look into the choice of following the path of duty and advancement or living a life of simplicity was already dealt with, and with far more aplomb, in This Side of Paradise.
It does introduce us to the concept of the Preservers, an ancient alien race that scooped up cultures in danger of extinction and repopulated them on new habitable worlds. That's a pretty interesting idea that I hope gets explored further; looking at other relics they may have left behind and whether or not their intentions were benevolent. Here they use it as their justification for why there's so many humanoids running around the galaxy. Hasn't bothered me!
ep 60 – "And the Children Shall Lead" (★★★)
OKAY MOTHERFUCKERS LETS DO SOME RESEARCH
This episode was written by one Edward J. Lasko. Miri was written by Adrian Spies. The Squire of Gothos was written by Paul Schneider. And Charlie X was written by Gene Roddenberry himself. So it seems that my inital assumption was slightly mistaken: MULTIPLE writers had a phobia of children! (Or at least in Gene's case, had a lot to say about the terror of pre-pubesence when unchecked and unguided)
There's a real poignancy here underneath all the cheese. These children are being manipulated, but what does that mean exactly? The episode makes it appear as though the ignorance of these kids is what is being abused but we've clearly demonstrated that the Gorgon is an alien with the power to control minds: It controls the children, and the children control the crew. The gorgon wants to travel to the earth colony to "recruit" more people and raise an army of subservient followers with himself at the top. Its very reminiscent of a pyramid scheme hence the gorgons being a race of marauders and pirates. The adults on the planet conducting the archaeological dig were with time able to pick up on and resist the mind-control. The gorgon deliberately went after the weakest and most susceptible targets, using them to kill the more strong-willed. Its chilling stuff. The ending is bittersweet when the children are finally able to grieve for the deaths, and themselves. I totally understand if people can't take this episode seriously, but it works for me.
ep 61 – "Is There in Truth No Beauty" (★★★★)
First gorgons and now medusas? This show about the future takes a lot of inspiration from the past!
An ambassador that drives you MAAAAD when you look upon him would not be high on my personal consideration to draft into an episode but I'm pleasantly surprised at how they executed it. The ambassador himself does not feature into the episode heavily: The story's really an examination of Dr. Miranda Jones and her relationships, as well as the social forces that attempt to pigenhole her.
There's a scene which is uncomfortable but also what makes it very good: When Kirk confronts Jones during her failed attempts to ressecutate Spock. She's willing to give up and declare him a lost cause but Kirk won't back down and tries to play the psychologist, blaming her for Spock's condition and passionately declaring she doesn't want Spock to recover on account for her jealousy of his mind-meld with the ambassador. Later he confesses to McCoy that maybe he never should have spoken to her, and maybe he let Spock die because Jones couldn't hear the truth.
But the episode plays all of this very ambiguously. Kirk might not only have been mistaken to enter the room and speak with her (against McCoy's recommendation) but totally mistaken to her motives. We never find out if that's how she actually felt, we only have Kirk's word and Jones herself is inscrutable on the matter. The whole episode most of the male crewmen have their idea of what a woman should desire and who Dr. Jones is, but are only able to appreciate her point of view superficially. They respect her, but only her aspects that they relate to. Dunno if any of what I just said was intended or even there at all, but that's what I took away from it. This is a good'un in my book.
That is a terrible title though. We're a far cry from the poeticism of City on the Edge of Forever. Perhaps not best episode, but best title by far. Maybe you disagree?
Making a game is a lot more fun than promoting a game. Just saying.
Think of it this way: I'll play your game, but I have to know it exists first. There's lots of games I know I'd like and would love to try, but I simply don't know are there. I didn't know about Phoenotopia until a friend recommended it to me. Don't have a switch but if I did I'd be all over that.
But that's also the real trick. A friend recommended it to me and I don't have the console. PC game + personal recommendation is the magic combo. There's no better marketing for a game than a positive shared experience.
But that's also the real trick. A friend recommended it to me and I don't have the console. PC game + personal recommendation is the magic combo. There's no better marketing for a game than a positive shared experience.
Brutal 7 Mafia (Canceled)
--Lets Watch Star Trek for the First Time! [The Original Series]
ep 57 – "Spock's Brain" (★★★★)
*SPOCKS BRAIN
HAS BEEN
STOLEN BY
CAVEWOMEN
This episode does not take itself seriously and neither should you. I could see the rips in the fabric here: The budget's been cut hasn't it? The opening segment was full of re-used clips. When we first begin I was initially intrigued because Spock's mind has just up and left. Stolen by the hot young woman who boarded the vessel from an advanced spaceship. Its not like they stole his mental capacity like what happened to Uhura -- she up and LIFTED his brain. *wildly flailing arms* What do they need Spock's brain for?! And why Spock!? Once we arrive on the planet and encounter the primitive natives I figured we had a Zardoz situation on our hands BUT NOOOO! The women are also dumb! Everyone is dumb! EVERYTHING is dumb! ROOOOLIN ON THE RIVERRRRR.
I love this so, so much. This is exuding powerful Dungeons & Dragons featuring Jeremy Irons energy.
I think my favorite moments were the James Doohan cutaways. I don't know if its because of a spotty filming schedule or what but they splice in edits of Scotty remarking on the situation in the most ham-fisted way possible. They cut from a wide shot of the group, to a close-up of Scotty saying something, then back to the group that still includes Scotty! Oh, wait lets back up a second. I haven't mentioned that McCoy rigs up Spock's brainless body to a control mechanism that lets them walk Spock around like an R.C Car. They explain in sick bay why this is necessary but I couldn't shake the feeling that it was bullshit? I dunno, maybe its just me but if you have a body that's running without a brain its probably expending a lot of energy to do so and you shouldn't have it use more than necessary. I'm a layman, not a doctor! Once McCoy puts on the happy hat and levels up he starts to put Spock's brain back in but then halfway through he forgets how because the mind powers wear off! BUT he got just enough done to hook up Spock's vocal chords, so Spock is able to guide him through the rest of the process and put him back together like new 'phew!' Science officer Spock learned much from his experience being a brain-in-a-box about the sociological structure of the society and oh boy he was like a kid in a candy store.
SWING BATTERBATTERBATTERBATTER SWING BATTERBATTERBATTER SWING~BATTERRRRR~
*please read this in the voice of the Monty Python gumbys.
ep 58 – "The Enterprise Incident" (★★★★★)
"Chart course for the Neutral Zone, Mr. Sulu"
We're goin' into the WHAT
"Leaving Neutral Zone" says Mr. Sulu "Now entering Romulan space."
We're comin' into the WHAT?!
"That's a Klingon ship!" says Mr. Scott.
WHAT IS HAPPENINGGGG
"We're surrounded."
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
It didn't take very long to put the puzzle together here, because we've known Spock far longer than the romulans have. I adore this idea of looking at the Kirk Romance from the opposite perspective. I suppose being able to flirt is a requirement for becoming a starship captain! You could look at the romulan captain's attempts to seduce Spock to the romulan side as the height of stupidity because, y'know, he's a vulcan and isn't too concerned about his personal advancement. I look at it as foolhardy overconfidence: "You say I can't seduce a vulcan THE HELL I CAN'T" well she had some of that Kirk magic in that old silk dress because she certainly made an impression on the science officer.
I didn't think there'd be such a low number of episodes with Romulans in them (two and a half so far across the three seasons) so any story featuring their cunning is most welcome. If you haven't seen this because you skipped out on Season 3 go check it out! Its always a blast watching the enterprise crew work in absolute synergy and this is one of the best of those.
*SPOCKS BRAIN
HAS BEEN
STOLEN BY
CAVEWOMEN
This episode does not take itself seriously and neither should you. I could see the rips in the fabric here: The budget's been cut hasn't it? The opening segment was full of re-used clips. When we first begin I was initially intrigued because Spock's mind has just up and left. Stolen by the hot young woman who boarded the vessel from an advanced spaceship. Its not like they stole his mental capacity like what happened to Uhura -- she up and LIFTED his brain. *wildly flailing arms* What do they need Spock's brain for?! And why Spock!? Once we arrive on the planet and encounter the primitive natives I figured we had a Zardoz situation on our hands BUT NOOOO! The women are also dumb! Everyone is dumb! EVERYTHING is dumb! ROOOOLIN ON THE RIVERRRRR.
I love this so, so much. This is exuding powerful Dungeons & Dragons featuring Jeremy Irons energy.
I think my favorite moments were the James Doohan cutaways. I don't know if its because of a spotty filming schedule or what but they splice in edits of Scotty remarking on the situation in the most ham-fisted way possible. They cut from a wide shot of the group, to a close-up of Scotty saying something, then back to the group that still includes Scotty! Oh, wait lets back up a second. I haven't mentioned that McCoy rigs up Spock's brainless body to a control mechanism that lets them walk Spock around like an R.C Car. They explain in sick bay why this is necessary but I couldn't shake the feeling that it was bullshit? I dunno, maybe its just me but if you have a body that's running without a brain its probably expending a lot of energy to do so and you shouldn't have it use more than necessary. I'm a layman, not a doctor! Once McCoy puts on the happy hat and levels up he starts to put Spock's brain back in but then halfway through he forgets how because the mind powers wear off! BUT he got just enough done to hook up Spock's vocal chords, so Spock is able to guide him through the rest of the process and put him back together like new 'phew!' Science officer Spock learned much from his experience being a brain-in-a-box about the sociological structure of the society and oh boy he was like a kid in a candy store.
SWING BATTERBATTERBATTERBATTER SWING BATTERBATTERBATTER SWING~BATTERRRRR~
*please read this in the voice of the Monty Python gumbys.
ep 58 – "The Enterprise Incident" (★★★★★)
"Chart course for the Neutral Zone, Mr. Sulu"
We're goin' into the WHAT
"Leaving Neutral Zone" says Mr. Sulu "Now entering Romulan space."
We're comin' into the WHAT?!
"That's a Klingon ship!" says Mr. Scott.
WHAT IS HAPPENINGGGG
"We're surrounded."
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
It didn't take very long to put the puzzle together here, because we've known Spock far longer than the romulans have. I adore this idea of looking at the Kirk Romance from the opposite perspective. I suppose being able to flirt is a requirement for becoming a starship captain! You could look at the romulan captain's attempts to seduce Spock to the romulan side as the height of stupidity because, y'know, he's a vulcan and isn't too concerned about his personal advancement. I look at it as foolhardy overconfidence: "You say I can't seduce a vulcan THE HELL I CAN'T" well she had some of that Kirk magic in that old silk dress because she certainly made an impression on the science officer.
I didn't think there'd be such a low number of episodes with Romulans in them (two and a half so far across the three seasons) so any story featuring their cunning is most welcome. If you haven't seen this because you skipped out on Season 3 go check it out! Its always a blast watching the enterprise crew work in absolute synergy and this is one of the best of those.
Brutal 7 Mafia (Canceled)
--Lets Watch Star Trek for the First Time! [The Original Series]
ep 54 – "The Ultimate Computer" (★★★★★)
This is an episode about the perils of ambition and pride. Cautionary tales against hubris never go out of style.
Daystrom is a badass name and what a great guest star! He elevates this episode from what could have been another man vs machine story into something more complicated. Its a very simple setup and execution so you wouldn't think it would be that captivating but its hearing the distress in the voice of the Lexington's captain. Seeing Kirk's pain at being utterly helpless to prevent the carnage. Daystrom's desperate attempts to appear stoic in the face of tragedy and bury his clear excitement when M-5 takes control of the ship. Kirk displaying his black belt in logic-fu. And not least the ambiguity of sending in such a young (it is a word I have chosen) computer to handle such a demanding assignment, there's a lot of humanity in this one. Oh the humanity! I watched it twice.
There's a moment where Kirk switches on the intercom and speaks to the whole ship. He's done this a lot to deliver inspiring messages to the crew before they do something dangerous, but due to the circumstances there's only 20 crew aboard this time. Not counting Daystrom we see Kirk, Spock, McCoy, Scotty, Chekov, Sulu, Uhura, and one dead engineering lieutenant. There's only 12 other people on the ship! It makes sense, I just found that very funny.
ep 55 – "Bread and Circuses" (★★)
The mind reels trying to communicate the incongruous dissonance between the subject matter and the presentation here. I simply cannot reckon a modern day ancient roman culture with televised gladiatorial matches with 1960s style commentary. My brain short-circuited. I'd love to know how much of this was a part of the script from the beginning and how much was compromise due to either budgetary or practical limitations.
This is a mediocre episode but its also a baffling one: The tail end of season 2 has been fond of alien races with anachronistic earth cultures that are tailored to those cultures down to a T. They do this at the expense of making a genuinely interesting alien race modeled after such a culture. That takes elements from it without copying it completely, leaving room for their own unique aspects that can be fleshed out over time and revisited instead of being a weird one-off. If only we had such a way of thrusting Kirk & co onto a world habitated by space romans!
That said I was pretty happy with how madcap this was. The space romans use sub-machine guns instead of swords, but still fight with swords and shields in the gladiator games. I also thought it was genuinely interesting how this time, the starship captain who finds himself stranded on the planet aquires the title of princeps civitatis not by his own hand but the machinations of the native pro-consol that now has the captain under his thumb in order to learn more about these strange spacemen and their powerful technology. Very shrewd!
ep 56 – "Assignment: Earth" (★)
Nothing______________Happens
_______________so________________boring
_______send_____________________________________________help
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
SEASON 2 COMPLETE!
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Favorite Episodes
Mirror, Mirror / Journey to Babel
The Doomsday Machine
I, Mudd / The Trouble with Tribbles
Metamorphosis
The Ultimate Computer
This is an episode about the perils of ambition and pride. Cautionary tales against hubris never go out of style.
Daystrom is a badass name and what a great guest star! He elevates this episode from what could have been another man vs machine story into something more complicated. Its a very simple setup and execution so you wouldn't think it would be that captivating but its hearing the distress in the voice of the Lexington's captain. Seeing Kirk's pain at being utterly helpless to prevent the carnage. Daystrom's desperate attempts to appear stoic in the face of tragedy and bury his clear excitement when M-5 takes control of the ship. Kirk displaying his black belt in logic-fu. And not least the ambiguity of sending in such a young (it is a word I have chosen) computer to handle such a demanding assignment, there's a lot of humanity in this one. Oh the humanity! I watched it twice.
There's a moment where Kirk switches on the intercom and speaks to the whole ship. He's done this a lot to deliver inspiring messages to the crew before they do something dangerous, but due to the circumstances there's only 20 crew aboard this time. Not counting Daystrom we see Kirk, Spock, McCoy, Scotty, Chekov, Sulu, Uhura, and one dead engineering lieutenant. There's only 12 other people on the ship! It makes sense, I just found that very funny.
ep 55 – "Bread and Circuses" (★★)
The mind reels trying to communicate the incongruous dissonance between the subject matter and the presentation here. I simply cannot reckon a modern day ancient roman culture with televised gladiatorial matches with 1960s style commentary. My brain short-circuited. I'd love to know how much of this was a part of the script from the beginning and how much was compromise due to either budgetary or practical limitations.
This is a mediocre episode but its also a baffling one: The tail end of season 2 has been fond of alien races with anachronistic earth cultures that are tailored to those cultures down to a T. They do this at the expense of making a genuinely interesting alien race modeled after such a culture. That takes elements from it without copying it completely, leaving room for their own unique aspects that can be fleshed out over time and revisited instead of being a weird one-off. If only we had such a way of thrusting Kirk & co onto a world habitated by space romans!
That said I was pretty happy with how madcap this was. The space romans use sub-machine guns instead of swords, but still fight with swords and shields in the gladiator games. I also thought it was genuinely interesting how this time, the starship captain who finds himself stranded on the planet aquires the title of princeps civitatis not by his own hand but the machinations of the native pro-consol that now has the captain under his thumb in order to learn more about these strange spacemen and their powerful technology. Very shrewd!
ep 56 – "Assignment: Earth" (★)
Nothing______________Happens
_______________so________________boring
_______send_____________________________________________help
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
SEASON 2 COMPLETE!
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Favorite Episodes
Mirror, Mirror / Journey to Babel
The Doomsday Machine
I, Mudd / The Trouble with Tribbles
Metamorphosis
The Ultimate Computer
--Lets Watch Star Trek for the First Time! [The Original Series]
--Lets Watch Star Trek for the First Time! [The Original Series]
ep 52 – "By Any Other Name" (★★)
The netflix description for this episode reads: "Kirk, Spock, McCoy, and a couple of redshirts beam down to the surface of a planet to answer a fake distress call." This describes every mediocre episode of star trek and I am most concerned. The team beams down to the planet (nice backdrop btw) and two people, a man and a woman come over the hill to speak to them.
"I'm Captain Kirk. We're here in answer to your distress call."
"Very kind of you to respond so quickly, Captain. Now, you will surrender your ship over to me."
I couldn't help but imagine Kirk roll his eyes. Usually when this sort of thing happens there's some kind of lead-up and rising action before we get the big stinger, but this time its just a guy in a field! A man and a woman who look like they were on holiday in the bahamas! What's more this is like the 9th time its happened. Turns out that the two of them are a scouting force of the Kelvan Empire from the Andromeda galaxy, advance scouts for an invasion 300 years in the making.
Now imagine learning about something like that! An empire as dasterdly as the Romulans or the Klingons! The Kelvans! From a distant galaxy! Their technology foreign and unknown, their potential unmeasured and totally overmatching ours! They turned the crew into salt cubes! That's exciting, or it would be if they weren't so goddamn boring. They don't even have cool costumes like the Romulans they just look like dudes. Farmer dudes who don't look out of place on an earth colony.
Once the ship is captured and on its way back to Andromeda things start getting juicy. I adore how the episode resolves itself: Because the Kelvans have taken human form to operate the enterprise, this subjects them to human stimuli, which Kirk & co are quick to take advantage of. POUR ME A STIFF ONE, MR. SCOTT! The Kelvans are so stubborn and anti-fun they have to be slowly drip-fed all the things that make life worth living over an unspecified number of weeks before they finally are convinced to just settle a planet in the Milky Way and live out their lives having a good time...which is what Kirk suggested in the first place! The latter 1/5th of the episode is good, but everything before is so stringent I can't recommend this too highly.
ep 53 – "The Omega Glory" (★★★★)
Earlier in the season when I said "Prime Directive?! What kind of communist propaganda is that?!?" never would I have guessed in my wildest daydreams that statement would be foreshadowing. At long, long last the prime directive finally lives and breathes in star trek. Most episodes start good and get better toward the end. This one starts well and gets worse? But that's debatable because FLAAAAAAAG. I was doing triple-takes in my seat. The mental decathalon this episode puts you through...
I wasn't sure how I felt about this episode immediately after watching it but now with some time to reflect I'm confident that this is excellent! A perfectly balanced breakfast of greens, eggs, and ham. What more can one ask for?! There's a genuine villain here in Captain Ron Tracey. A starship captain gone rogue, using the natives of an alien world for his personal gain. He's properly despicable and a good antagonist but he sort of falls by the wayside once his plot is uncovered to be a wild goose chase. The dynamic between him and the cohns isn't fleshed out but he treats them like sub-humans, and won't even let them finish sentences. I love how the episode begins with the deserted starship and the mysterious piles of salt, the urgent final records of the ship doctor and the sudden scene of violence down on the surface of the planet. It just throws everything at the wall, this one.
Like I said, its equal parts serious and goofy. I take it many folks aren't too keen on Kirk busting out the goddamn U.S Constitution to inspire some primitive natives but he DOESN'T bust it out on them! They had it the whole time on their planet! This place isn't earth mind you, there's no reason for them to have these artifacts and no explanation is given for why they're there. The yangs worship these sacred words despite not being able to read them well. All Kirk does is reveal the true meaning of the sacred texts! There's also a knife fight between Roy & Kirk. Back in high school I was a member of the martial arts class and we'd bust out a toy knife and tussel just like in the episode. Gave me warm fuzzy flashbacks. It ends up a draw because Spock stares at a woman long enough for her to give him the communicator he was holding. Its hard to explain.
Embrace the ham motherfuckers!
The netflix description for this episode reads: "Kirk, Spock, McCoy, and a couple of redshirts beam down to the surface of a planet to answer a fake distress call." This describes every mediocre episode of star trek and I am most concerned. The team beams down to the planet (nice backdrop btw) and two people, a man and a woman come over the hill to speak to them.
"I'm Captain Kirk. We're here in answer to your distress call."
"Very kind of you to respond so quickly, Captain. Now, you will surrender your ship over to me."
I couldn't help but imagine Kirk roll his eyes. Usually when this sort of thing happens there's some kind of lead-up and rising action before we get the big stinger, but this time its just a guy in a field! A man and a woman who look like they were on holiday in the bahamas! What's more this is like the 9th time its happened. Turns out that the two of them are a scouting force of the Kelvan Empire from the Andromeda galaxy, advance scouts for an invasion 300 years in the making.
Now imagine learning about something like that! An empire as dasterdly as the Romulans or the Klingons! The Kelvans! From a distant galaxy! Their technology foreign and unknown, their potential unmeasured and totally overmatching ours! They turned the crew into salt cubes! That's exciting, or it would be if they weren't so goddamn boring. They don't even have cool costumes like the Romulans they just look like dudes. Farmer dudes who don't look out of place on an earth colony.
Once the ship is captured and on its way back to Andromeda things start getting juicy. I adore how the episode resolves itself: Because the Kelvans have taken human form to operate the enterprise, this subjects them to human stimuli, which Kirk & co are quick to take advantage of. POUR ME A STIFF ONE, MR. SCOTT! The Kelvans are so stubborn and anti-fun they have to be slowly drip-fed all the things that make life worth living over an unspecified number of weeks before they finally are convinced to just settle a planet in the Milky Way and live out their lives having a good time...which is what Kirk suggested in the first place! The latter 1/5th of the episode is good, but everything before is so stringent I can't recommend this too highly.
ep 53 – "The Omega Glory" (★★★★)
Earlier in the season when I said "Prime Directive?! What kind of communist propaganda is that?!?" never would I have guessed in my wildest daydreams that statement would be foreshadowing. At long, long last the prime directive finally lives and breathes in star trek. Most episodes start good and get better toward the end. This one starts well and gets worse? But that's debatable because FLAAAAAAAG. I was doing triple-takes in my seat. The mental decathalon this episode puts you through...
I wasn't sure how I felt about this episode immediately after watching it but now with some time to reflect I'm confident that this is excellent! A perfectly balanced breakfast of greens, eggs, and ham. What more can one ask for?! There's a genuine villain here in Captain Ron Tracey. A starship captain gone rogue, using the natives of an alien world for his personal gain. He's properly despicable and a good antagonist but he sort of falls by the wayside once his plot is uncovered to be a wild goose chase. The dynamic between him and the cohns isn't fleshed out but he treats them like sub-humans, and won't even let them finish sentences. I love how the episode begins with the deserted starship and the mysterious piles of salt, the urgent final records of the ship doctor and the sudden scene of violence down on the surface of the planet. It just throws everything at the wall, this one.
Like I said, its equal parts serious and goofy. I take it many folks aren't too keen on Kirk busting out the goddamn U.S Constitution to inspire some primitive natives but he DOESN'T bust it out on them! They had it the whole time on their planet! This place isn't earth mind you, there's no reason for them to have these artifacts and no explanation is given for why they're there. The yangs worship these sacred words despite not being able to read them well. All Kirk does is reveal the true meaning of the sacred texts! There's also a knife fight between Roy & Kirk. Back in high school I was a member of the martial arts class and we'd bust out a toy knife and tussel just like in the episode. Gave me warm fuzzy flashbacks. It ends up a draw because Spock stares at a woman long enough for her to give him the communicator he was holding. Its hard to explain.
Embrace the ham motherfuckers!
--Lets Watch Star Trek for the First Time! [The Original Series]
ep49 – "A Private Little War" (★★★)
Random thought: Why is it that in old media, when someone is playing a part set in the ancient past, they always do that thing where they grab your arms and shake them when they're happy to see you? Y'know what I mean – its the hug without actually hugging. I don't think its an example of 60s syndrome though because you sometimes see it in modern media as well; its always in the context of some older, dignified culture.
Those WACKY KLINGONS are up to their old tricks again! This is a peaceful planet of simple hunter-gatherers. However they have no need of warfare and cooperate with other tribes on their world. So naturally, the Klingons have decided to influence their development by giving them GUNS. Not just any guns, flintlock rifles! Go, fight with the others, and let the strongest be the ruler of this world, and a new governor of the glorious Klingon Empire! (sigh)
This is one that's really hard to rate. Its probably more like a 3.5 for me. More than simply interesting, but not good enough to be thrilled seeing as a re-run. The standout here is Nona, the wife of the village leader Tyree. She's a fantastic actress that stands toe-to-toe with Kirk, outshining everyone else. Its basically an episode all about how Nona, far more callous and unopposed to killing than the others, is trying to secure more powerful weapons so that the hill tribes can fight against the village dwellers and their rifles. Tyree and his hill tribes are struggling against their loathing of killing with the need to defend themselves, and the enterprise crew is trying to prevent their gaining advanced technology because of their policy of noninterference. Thus I'm confident in categorizing this as the first real prime directive episode, where it presents a genuine dilemma.
Kirk eventually decides that since the Klingons have already contaminated the culture, its simply wishful thinking to believe they can be reverted back to their peaceful ways. If he doesn't introduce guns of equivalent technology to the hill tribes then they'll be wiped out by the villagers anyway. This draws some pretty obvious parallels to the Cold War that the episode is eager to hammer over the anvil. The real crux of the story is Tyree's personal struggle. Killing others is clearly anathema to their culture and although he's well aware of the dangers his people face, he refuses to turn away from his values. Nona, frustrated with Tyree and the others, steals a phaser and tries to switch sides to join the villagers. They villagers end up assaulting then killing her, which finally drives Tyree over the edge as he demands for more weapons from Kirk to take revenge on the villagers who he sees has completely abandoned their ethos. This is sort of what I meant when I said City on the Edge of Forever had no right to be that good: This premise has just as much merit, but doesn't reach the heights as that episode did because of how ham-handed the delivery is.
Speaking of which I didn't think of it till just now: Spock got shot by one of the guns in the opening and spends the episode in sickbay recovering from the wound. We get a good luck at his vulcan physiology and a doctor who's had some experience with vulcans to help explain it to the rest of us (one of the running plot-points of the show is that Bones doesn't know much about vulcan biology so having a doctor in this episode tells me he's probably a recent addition to the crew). The fact that Spock is out of the picture means that his logic is likewise indisposed, leaving the passionate Kirk & McCoy to feel their way out of the situation. The ending left me unsatisfied because I'm certain there had to be a better way.
P.S: The (alleged) noninterference policy has nothing to do with this episode! Kirk initially lived here as a researcher 11 years ago and personally recommended to starfleet in his field notes that the planet be left untouched so the culture could continue to develop along its uniquely peaceful path. The show might be starting to find its footing with the prime directive but there is still plenty of plausible deniability.
ep 50 – "Return to Tomorrow" (★★)
Not a huge fan of this one although I can't say it isn't without merits. My dislike stems from everyone acting wooden with the exception of Nimoy & Shatner (heart....pumping....to...see!....again!). There's something magical in seeing Spock leaning 28 degrees against a door frame with a shit-eating grin spittin' fire at poor Scotty for just bein' himself. Those few moments of fun are like drops in a sea of ROOOODDENBEERRRYYYYYY.
I've started to sniff out a few common recurring elements:
I'm poking fun here but these sorts of episodes tend to run very drrrrrrrrry and considering all of the great banter, acting, and depths the main cast has been able to explore over the series course, this feels like a step backward. No one feels like themselves – McCoy at one point says "What the devil?" which is the least 'McCoy' thing ever! Also in case it wasn't obvious: Kirk, Spock, and Mulhall (I had to look up her name I think they mention it once in the episode and I plum forgot) are possessed by three deific beings: Sargon, Thalassa, and Henoch. The episode is entirely about these beings and their struggles. You see, he's called Sargon because his alien race may have been a progenitor of the human species and many others. Maybe. He's not sure. Its just a hypothesis, really.
Also return to tomorrow is a terrible title. We don't go back to the future at all!
ep 51 – "Patterns of Force" (★)
I tried my best readers but it was 7:00am and I fell asleep. I skipped over it and watched the next episode before coming back and trying again. I made it about halfway then gave up. If this is secretly good, let me know!
I can't believe they took the exact same concept as A Piece of the Action except boring this time. In that episode they clearly knew it was the dumbest thing ever and executed it with tongue firmly in cheek. But this time its nazis! I don't want nazis in star trek! Nazis ruin everything! You don't invite nazis to a birthday party!
Random thought: Why is it that in old media, when someone is playing a part set in the ancient past, they always do that thing where they grab your arms and shake them when they're happy to see you? Y'know what I mean – its the hug without actually hugging. I don't think its an example of 60s syndrome though because you sometimes see it in modern media as well; its always in the context of some older, dignified culture.
Those WACKY KLINGONS are up to their old tricks again! This is a peaceful planet of simple hunter-gatherers. However they have no need of warfare and cooperate with other tribes on their world. So naturally, the Klingons have decided to influence their development by giving them GUNS. Not just any guns, flintlock rifles! Go, fight with the others, and let the strongest be the ruler of this world, and a new governor of the glorious Klingon Empire! (sigh)
This is one that's really hard to rate. Its probably more like a 3.5 for me. More than simply interesting, but not good enough to be thrilled seeing as a re-run. The standout here is Nona, the wife of the village leader Tyree. She's a fantastic actress that stands toe-to-toe with Kirk, outshining everyone else. Its basically an episode all about how Nona, far more callous and unopposed to killing than the others, is trying to secure more powerful weapons so that the hill tribes can fight against the village dwellers and their rifles. Tyree and his hill tribes are struggling against their loathing of killing with the need to defend themselves, and the enterprise crew is trying to prevent their gaining advanced technology because of their policy of noninterference. Thus I'm confident in categorizing this as the first real prime directive episode, where it presents a genuine dilemma.
Kirk eventually decides that since the Klingons have already contaminated the culture, its simply wishful thinking to believe they can be reverted back to their peaceful ways. If he doesn't introduce guns of equivalent technology to the hill tribes then they'll be wiped out by the villagers anyway. This draws some pretty obvious parallels to the Cold War that the episode is eager to hammer over the anvil. The real crux of the story is Tyree's personal struggle. Killing others is clearly anathema to their culture and although he's well aware of the dangers his people face, he refuses to turn away from his values. Nona, frustrated with Tyree and the others, steals a phaser and tries to switch sides to join the villagers. They villagers end up assaulting then killing her, which finally drives Tyree over the edge as he demands for more weapons from Kirk to take revenge on the villagers who he sees has completely abandoned their ethos. This is sort of what I meant when I said City on the Edge of Forever had no right to be that good: This premise has just as much merit, but doesn't reach the heights as that episode did because of how ham-handed the delivery is.
Speaking of which I didn't think of it till just now: Spock got shot by one of the guns in the opening and spends the episode in sickbay recovering from the wound. We get a good luck at his vulcan physiology and a doctor who's had some experience with vulcans to help explain it to the rest of us (one of the running plot-points of the show is that Bones doesn't know much about vulcan biology so having a doctor in this episode tells me he's probably a recent addition to the crew). The fact that Spock is out of the picture means that his logic is likewise indisposed, leaving the passionate Kirk & McCoy to feel their way out of the situation. The ending left me unsatisfied because I'm certain there had to be a better way.
P.S: The (alleged) noninterference policy has nothing to do with this episode! Kirk initially lived here as a researcher 11 years ago and personally recommended to starfleet in his field notes that the planet be left untouched so the culture could continue to develop along its uniquely peaceful path. The show might be starting to find its footing with the prime directive but there is still plenty of plausible deniability.
ep 50 – "Return to Tomorrow" (★★)
Not a huge fan of this one although I can't say it isn't without merits. My dislike stems from everyone acting wooden with the exception of Nimoy & Shatner (heart....pumping....to...see!....again!). There's something magical in seeing Spock leaning 28 degrees against a door frame with a shit-eating grin spittin' fire at poor Scotty for just bein' himself. Those few moments of fun are like drops in a sea of ROOOODDENBEERRRYYYYYY.
I've started to sniff out a few common recurring elements:
- Disembodied voice of highly intelligent, omnipotent beings? Check
- Lofty dialogue that comes across sterile? Check
- Woman who appears to have an important role but doesn't accomplish much? Check
- Highly cerebral premise that dominates the plot? Check
- Crew of the ship more like fascinated observers than actors within the story? Check
- "Vessel?" Check
- Primary conflict revolving around moral decisions? Check
- Deus ex machina? Check
I'm poking fun here but these sorts of episodes tend to run very drrrrrrrrry and considering all of the great banter, acting, and depths the main cast has been able to explore over the series course, this feels like a step backward. No one feels like themselves – McCoy at one point says "What the devil?" which is the least 'McCoy' thing ever! Also in case it wasn't obvious: Kirk, Spock, and Mulhall (I had to look up her name I think they mention it once in the episode and I plum forgot) are possessed by three deific beings: Sargon, Thalassa, and Henoch. The episode is entirely about these beings and their struggles. You see, he's called Sargon because his alien race may have been a progenitor of the human species and many others. Maybe. He's not sure. Its just a hypothesis, really.
Also return to tomorrow is a terrible title. We don't go back to the future at all!
ep 51 – "Patterns of Force" (★)
I tried my best readers but it was 7:00am and I fell asleep. I skipped over it and watched the next episode before coming back and trying again. I made it about halfway then gave up. If this is secretly good, let me know!
I can't believe they took the exact same concept as A Piece of the Action except boring this time. In that episode they clearly knew it was the dumbest thing ever and executed it with tongue firmly in cheek. But this time its nazis! I don't want nazis in star trek! Nazis ruin everything! You don't invite nazis to a birthday party!
--Lets Watch Star Trek for the First Time! [The Original Series]
ep47 – "A Piece of the Action" (★★★★)
Hunh? What? Wha-wh-heh-whaaa-ahahahahahaha aha HAAHAHAHAHAHA. Alright I think I found one dumber than the Gorn episode. Gee, I wonder if this might be why starfleet drafted a (alleged) noninterference directive. I think as far as viewer engagement this is only 3 stars, but comedy alone nudges this up to 4. They all have weapons! All of them! When the big boss sicks his men on Kirk even his secretary pulls out a revolver! Its so stupid! SO STHUPID!
This is a good episode for Kirk shenanigans. I wish I had the time and patience to make gifs because there's some choice moments in this one. Spock nerve-pinches one of the guards to Krako's place and his eyes are sayin' "Ah christ wit dis shit again." All I gotta say is Kirk gets to bust out his 1920s accent and it is utterly delightful. Spock tries but you can tell he's supremely uncomfortable. McCoy is mostly confused throughout.
I wondered about this during the previous episode but I'm gonna bring it up here: McCoy sure gets to hang out on the bridge a lot. He's a medical doctor and seeing that the enterprise is an exploration vessel that gets into scrapes on the regular its appropriate that the captain ought to have some sort of working relationship with the ship physician. However that doesn't necessarily mean that McCoy has the technical knowledge to operate anything on the bridge – indeed whenever he is up there its to complain at someone, usually Spock. This isn't a nitpick! I think its another good way to show the deep friendship between Kirk & McCoy without spelling it out.
ep48 – "The Immunity Syndrome" (★★★★)
Barely two minutes into the episode, the show throws out a shock chord at Spock's horrified face when he feels the death of the starship Intrepid. Readers, I'd like to point out that each time this has happened (but particularly during close-ups) has been a wonderful experience: I'm one-hundred percent on board and do a little backflip of faux-shock in my chair each time. I really wish those would come back in style.
The enterprise is ordered on an emergency mission into a solar system that seems to have vanished from the starmaps, and populations of billions disappeared overnight. A great black hole in space appears, and Kirk with trepidation orders the ship beyond it's boundary and into the unknown...
This is a really well done plot but its the character interactions and most of all the structure & pacing, that sell it. Bones & Spock have always had a somewhat odd relationship, teetering between mutual respect of your fellow's talent and conflicting notions of what a proper man (or vulcan) should be. I had some high school friends I butt heads over religion at lunchtime and the discussions could go at length, so I understand the dynamic here. I love how the episode eases you into things bit by bit, your own questions and discomfort mirroring that of the crew's. It leaves the nature of the anomaly a complete secret until they spring it on you all at once. We've got it all here: Excellent mystery and build up, fleshing out of characters, scenes of tension, and an engaging premise. There IS a dearth of Kirk shenanigans and ham however, so I guess it doesn't have everything.
"Shut up, Spock! We're rescuing you!"
Hunh? What? Wha-wh-heh-whaaa-ahahahahahaha aha HAAHAHAHAHAHA. Alright I think I found one dumber than the Gorn episode. Gee, I wonder if this might be why starfleet drafted a (alleged) noninterference directive. I think as far as viewer engagement this is only 3 stars, but comedy alone nudges this up to 4. They all have weapons! All of them! When the big boss sicks his men on Kirk even his secretary pulls out a revolver! Its so stupid! SO STHUPID!
This is a good episode for Kirk shenanigans. I wish I had the time and patience to make gifs because there's some choice moments in this one. Spock nerve-pinches one of the guards to Krako's place and his eyes are sayin' "Ah christ wit dis shit again." All I gotta say is Kirk gets to bust out his 1920s accent and it is utterly delightful. Spock tries but you can tell he's supremely uncomfortable. McCoy is mostly confused throughout.
I wondered about this during the previous episode but I'm gonna bring it up here: McCoy sure gets to hang out on the bridge a lot. He's a medical doctor and seeing that the enterprise is an exploration vessel that gets into scrapes on the regular its appropriate that the captain ought to have some sort of working relationship with the ship physician. However that doesn't necessarily mean that McCoy has the technical knowledge to operate anything on the bridge – indeed whenever he is up there its to complain at someone, usually Spock. This isn't a nitpick! I think its another good way to show the deep friendship between Kirk & McCoy without spelling it out.
ep48 – "The Immunity Syndrome" (★★★★)
Barely two minutes into the episode, the show throws out a shock chord at Spock's horrified face when he feels the death of the starship Intrepid. Readers, I'd like to point out that each time this has happened (but particularly during close-ups) has been a wonderful experience: I'm one-hundred percent on board and do a little backflip of faux-shock in my chair each time. I really wish those would come back in style.
The enterprise is ordered on an emergency mission into a solar system that seems to have vanished from the starmaps, and populations of billions disappeared overnight. A great black hole in space appears, and Kirk with trepidation orders the ship beyond it's boundary and into the unknown...
This is a really well done plot but its the character interactions and most of all the structure & pacing, that sell it. Bones & Spock have always had a somewhat odd relationship, teetering between mutual respect of your fellow's talent and conflicting notions of what a proper man (or vulcan) should be. I had some high school friends I butt heads over religion at lunchtime and the discussions could go at length, so I understand the dynamic here. I love how the episode eases you into things bit by bit, your own questions and discomfort mirroring that of the crew's. It leaves the nature of the anomaly a complete secret until they spring it on you all at once. We've got it all here: Excellent mystery and build up, fleshing out of characters, scenes of tension, and an engaging premise. There IS a dearth of Kirk shenanigans and ham however, so I guess it doesn't have everything.
"Shut up, Spock! We're rescuing you!"
Games - Tester
Games - Other
