i like breakfast
Castle Quest Demo
"...This game is fun and different than any other RPG Maker game." - Maia "Your game seems so cool, I might actually download it." - Cop Killa


My Opinions

I have been fairly dormant in the community for a long while, doing like twelve history degrees and writing screenplays and teleplays and regular plays. But I want to come back and make games and release games and take a more active part in RMN again. I haven't released a game in so long that I forget what it's like to have other people play your stuff and like it. It's worth the work, right? Maybe I have always aimed too high for myself but now the result is that I am sitting on a HUGE stockpile of pixel art and I am waiting for something to do with it all.

I guess I'm just asking each of you, is it worth it? What do you think? Is rpgmaking still worth the effort? I wonder if it is, even though I have this (questionable?) desire to be positive and waste some time making a game and showing it off to you guys.

I guess it's not worth it if I don't enjoy it, is the point of it all. Maybe I just got older. I've been floating around the community for 11 years (oh god) and I've honestly still got nothing better to do.

Maybe I still enjoy it. I never really enjoyed playing any of your games, though. Most of them weren't very good. There are some gems. About 10% have a certain charm for me. That being said, over the years, standards have definetly risen. We all got older, maybe. Personally, I haven't done much in the past few years though. Maybe that's the problem. We all move on to other things before we realize our potential at this small, particular, peculiar craft, because we don't feel like it's worth it.

Maybe the community is maybe too small? Or we have this Catholic complex where we feel guilty about it for some reason. Or maybe that's just me. I am pretty soaking Catholic. I feel guilty about everything.

I realize full well nothing I say should be taken seriously ipso facto welp welp

thats right rmn you are once again the target of my existential episodes

Looking for that free program that lets you make NES-style sounds effects.

Anyone have it or know what it's called?


i was just going through all the posts I put on RMN over the past few years, and I have made a lot of jokes that I thought were funny at the time and in hindsight remind me of things my dad would say. also I've grown up a lot having lived in abject poverty for a few months, switching career paths twice, and finding a sweetheart to devote myself to, and realized my capacity for past dickishness.

so sorry you guys had to suffer through all that

RMN, wanna help rescue horses in Atlantic Canada?

Hi guys, this topic asks for you to vote for our not-for-profit organization, Earth Spirit Horse Rescue in the Aviva Community Fund Challenge so that we can get up to $500,000 in funding to help save horses in Atlantic Canada.


EDIT: You can vote Once A Day, Every Day until Novemeber 15th. Also, it would be great if you could help spread the word!

Post our voting page to Facebook.
Post our voting page to Twitter.
Post our voting page to Digg.

My sweetheart and I live in New Brunswick, and we started Earth Spirit Horse Rescue Inc. earlier this year with the aim of rescuing, rehabilitating and rehoming abused and neglected horses in Atlantic Canada. SPCAs in Canada were orignally founded in the early 20th Century for care of neglected urban horses. Since then, the SPCAs have shifted thier focus to smaller pets, and are now ill-equipped to handle such large animals. According to the NB SCPA, the most animal abuse cases in the province today are reported to be for dogs, cats, and horses.

A lot of horses get a pretty rough deal. Old racing horses are usually "retired" when they are shipped to the slaughterhouse. Horses cared for by the older generation become at risk of neglect as their owners become incapable of giving them the attention they need. Every year, thousands of domestic horses in Canada shipped to feedlots, and then slaughtered for foreign cuisine, (mostly for France, Belgium & Japan). Slaughtering horses for meat is illegal in the U.S.A., but not in Canada. We hope that our little non-profit can make a big difference and save the lives of thousands of horses in the years to come.

We are entered into the Aviva Community Fund Challenge, which offers up to $500,000 in funding. If we are lucky enough to get it, we plan to devote that money to developing the 130 acres of land we have in Sussex, New Brunswick with stablage, pasture, water, power, and accommodation so that we can start taking in abused and neglected horses. We will aslo devote a chunk of that money to veterinary support for the animals.

We also plan to develop a community out reach program and use our facilities to partner with organizations like the Boys & Girls Club to provide youth with learning experiences with horses and other animals. In doing so, we can give back to our community and help improve the lives of not only animals but people as well.

You can vote once a day between November 15 and November 25, 2010. I am humbly asking that you vote as often as you can and invite any friends to do the same. This is something that has become near and dear to our hearts, so I'm asking all of you as well-wishers to throw your votes our way.

You can visit our website at, and click on the blue banner to vote for us at the Aviva Community Fund. The next best thing you can do aside from voting yourself is helping to spread the word. By doing this, you help raise awareness and get other people interested in our cause. Thanks in advance for your support.

TLDR: Trying to get funding from this contest to build a horse rescue. You can help by voting.

Every RPG Ever

Basically, this is why I only make tower defense games and ice cream parlor simulations.

"Arena" A Snow-Punk, Sci-Fi, Gladiator Story

I'm working on this just as a habit of writing a bit every day. It's a conversational, plain-clothes, personal sort of style. The world here is supposed to be filled with just the apathetic mechanics of a modern slave-based society. Our hero eventually becomes a gladiator. This has probably been done before but I haven't read anything like it, but then again I don't read much. C&C is appreciated.

I remember having a headache. That's pretty much it. I wish I could tell you more, but everything before that is pretty much a blur, a cloud of shapeless memories with nothing to say about them. I remember having a really bad headache, rolling over, and puking my guts out. Some of whatever was in my stomach got lodged in my nasal cavity, is how bad it was. It was a violent bodily convulsion, a sort of loss of control where your muscles automatically tense and throw your head forwards so that you don't vomit all over yourself.
Then I remember cold. I remember being freezing cold. Not just a, “Oh Its sort of chilly out, I had better wear a sweater” kind of cold, but the kind that freezes your eyelids closed and crystallizes the air you breathe on your nose hairs. It makes your scalp hurt and your hairs freeze together. It bites at your skin and purses your lips, makes your teeth chatter to the point that they start to wear down. It swells your feet if they start to sweat. If your feet start to sweat then your feet start to freeze. I'm a couple of toes short now, because of how cold it was. Luckily, they were not the important toes.
I was lying, prostrate, weak and unable to move. It would take all my effort to turn my head and open my eyes, just to look across the inside of the steel case I was being carried in. I was tied down, like a piece of cargo strapped in for a bumpy ride. Why was it so cold? Someone had cut a hole in my sweater and put a tube in my arm, and there were some wires and pads strapped to my chest and head. I would weakly try to move and the cold steel of the needle would pierce deeper into a muscle, scrape against the bone. If it was on the surface, I wouldn't have felt it, but it was in deep. Whoever put it in there did a damn shitty job. I lied there and listened to the hum of outside machinery, and felt the vibrations of locomotion underneath my aching bones.
I open my eyes and turn my head every once and a while. I didn't have the strength to talk, but the two others I saw huddled up in the corner of the ice box would throw words at me everyone once in a while. I couldn't understand what they were saying. A thickly built, powerful looking bearded, graying man, and a twenty-something woman, blond. They were curled up, covered in each other's limbs, trying to keep warm.
It must have been hours. It's almost always shorter than you think it was when you are cooped up alone in a box like that, but it was, at the very least, hours. It was too cold to sleep, and I was too weak to get up and untie myself. Eventually the vibrations slowed and the machinery began to rev slower, sputter and stop. An airlock unsealed and a metal door swung open near my feet, and light poured into the compartment. A breath of warmer air entered the fridge. It was still freezing cold.
I was too tired to even open my eyes, and by this point I am fairly certain they were frozen shut. I felt the not-so-warm breeze flow in, and then heard the boots of a couple of men tromp past. From what I could tell, they picked up the man and woman, from whom I hadn't heard a sound in a while.
“Geez, its cold in here.”
“Enviro must have broke. We'll check it on the way back.”
“Uh, I think this one is dead.”
“Oh, shit. He was a big guy, too. We just won't tell the boss about that one.”
“What do I do with him? Just throw him in the garbage or something?”
“I guess.”
They shuffle about, and I hear the dragging of bodies and the clatter of unloading, and the wind outside. Its a while before they come back.
“We're going to have to unhook him.”
“Whatever. Just pull that shit out him and let's go.”
A couple quick yanks pull the wires off. Another one does it for the needle. I feel a warm ooze of blood come out of my arm after a shocking tear of cold steel against my bone. Thank god they pulled the needle out. I wondered why these two guys weren't being more graceful and gentle with human passengers.
They wheeled me out into the wind. It threw wet clumps of snow onto my face. A snowflake lands on my eye and starts to melt the ice on my eyelashes, the cold water beading over and around the fine hairs. I force it open, and the overexposure of the sun makes me wince.
“He's waking up.” I've been awake for hours. The other one pipes in to give me “something.” I hear a shuffle in a bag and then feel a prick on my neck as the injector let out a little puff. I started to feel a little less cold. Too bad I wouldn't be awake to enjoy it.

I woke up when my body was dropped onto a concrete floor and just about every bone in my body felt the impact. I was still weak, and managed to let out a little yelp, and roll over to move most of my aching body off the cold floor. The air in the room is stagnant, hot, stuffy, but the floor is ice cold.
One of the two voices from before echoed across the room, “That one is pretty strong but he's taken a bad hit to the head, lost a lot of blood, and I think he's sick. Probably just a really bad case of the flu or something.”
A woman replies, “Right. Give him a tat and we'll see if we can't fix him up before we put him on the block.”
“He seems like the kind who might run,” said the guy.
“Then drug him.” Not a warm and cuddly sort of lass, I guess.
I was still coddled up on the floor, trying to deal with burning feet, frost bitten skin that feels like its melting off, and a hole in my arm the size of a penny. Steel shanked boots stomped against the ground over to me and I got another injection. I was picked up and slowly my thoughts started to blur together. Voices began to echo incoherently. There was poison in my blood, I kept thinking. They've poisoned me. Why would they poison a sick guy like me? Why can't they just leave me alone?
For a while I was dragged by the arms by a couple of pairs of boots. My eyes stayed closed, but I was seeing multi-colored, antiseptic, and terrifying images of the man and the woman freezing to death in the box with me. He's dead, I remembered. She's wasn't, though.
Through the azure apocalyptic haze of the narcotic, I made sure to remember certain things as my knees start to throb by repeatedly being banged against the floor. I remember a number, 6-0-4-3-7, spoken by a woman with a soft voice. I remember them labeling me as an off-worlder and then, when they had finally set me down and I began to reel, they strapped a machine to my arm that branded me with a laser. It dug into my skin like a shovel.
The pain was enough to make me puke again. I lost control, turned my head, and threw up on my own sleeve. I apologized through a series of slurs to whoever was watching. Not very dignified, I imagine. Its amazing how through the thickest of narcosis you can still feel embarrassed. They let me sit for a minute, and I was thankful that I passed out again within a moment or two.

I stirred awake. I was in a bed, and a fairly comfortable one at that, albeit I was tied to the fucking thing. I had gained back a little strength, and so I opened my eyes to see a spectacled and bearded gentleman in a white coat, pulling a catheter out of my arm. He seemed friendly enough to do it gently and patch me up when he was done.
“You were in bad shape, son.” I don't bother to answer. I stare blankly at him and turn my head to stretch my neck, and my swollen skin burns against the fabric of the sheets.
“You've lost a couple toes from frostbite. You got lucky though. They're not important toes.” The bastard chuckles. “Your ears are pretty bad too, but they will heal up. You were severely dehydrated and had a pretty bad case of acconnosis.”
I still have no idea what acconnosis is. I was in a hospital or a clinic. The walls were white-painted brick, and there were bars on the windows. I looked down the row of about half a dozen empty beds and medical machines and saw that the one on the end had a girl in it.
“That's the girl who came in your lot, eh? Don't worry, she's not as bad as you are. She'll be okay. Maybe you'll get lucky and wind up in the same lot on the way out.”
I turned my head back up at the bearded gentleman, who is jotting something down on a chart. “We're going to keep you here for three more days. I think it would be best if we kept you under sedation until it's time for you to go.”
I wanted to plead with him not to drug me again, but I wasn't about to beg. Its not like I had much choice in the matter. I saw him pull out a needle and load it up with whatever it was that he was going to give me. I still had no real idea where I was or what I was doing there.

What I suppose was three days later, they roused me awake. I felt a lot better, like a healthy guy might feel on the worst hangover of his life, but still, it was a definite improvement. They had shaved me when I was asleep. A couple of old, stocky nurses got me to sit up, and then coaxed me into trying to stand, despite the fact that I was bare-ass naked. I let go of my modesty and dropped my feet out of bed. It was hard, and they burned weirdly when I stepped down without all my toes onto not-quite-healed stitching. They gave me a black woolen sweater and a knitted cap and some fatigue pants, underwear, socks, and boots to put on. Nice clothes, I suppose. I was really hungry.
The doctor walked down the aisle, stopping to push a couple buttons on the girl's monitor. She wasn't awake yet.
“Feeling okay?” he shouted from down the hall. I shrugged. I just wanted to get out of there. I fingered at the bandage on my right arm, where the laser had dug its mark into me.
“Well, if you can walk, come with me.”
It takes me a minute to gain the wherewithal to shuffle down the aisle while holding onto bedposts. I pass the blond girl, she's out like a light. Probably won't be getting up anytime soon. Her skin is frostbitten and her pretty face is all blistered. At the end of the hall and around the corner, a giant steel door barricaded us in. The doctor opened it with his keycard, and we entered a security chamber. A short black woman sat behind a desk with an x-ray machine.
“We're checking him out,” said the doc. “0-6-0-4-3-7.”
The security officer punched it into the computer. “He's not listed with a name.” The doc turned to me, “You got a name, son?” I stared blankly at him. If I had a name, I didn't remember it.
The doc chit-chatted with her, "He's an off-worlder, so I wouldn't be surprised if his DNA isn't in the database.”
The lady finished her imputation and I was shuffled through a series of anti-chambers to what looked like a waiting room. A middle-aged, tall, thick, blond and bearded man sat waiting for me. He stood to greet the doctor.
“How do you do, doctor?” he had a thick accent, I couldn't tell from where.
“Just fine,” the doc pulled out a pen and checked a couple things off on his clipboard. The viking smiled at him, “And how is he?”
“He was in rough shape but he's healing up. Just sign here.”
“Good, good. No, he looks good, aside from the skin.”
“Looks like you got a pretty good deal,” said the doc as the man scrawled his mark on the clipboard. “We don't get many off-worlders anymore.”
“Well, that's why Ichabod bought him.”
That's when I realized I had been sold into slavery. Could be worse, I thought.

Snews vs RMNCast

Has the Snews replaced the RMNCast? I want to know why it has been so long since I have heard ther referrential voices of other humans actually talk about RPGMaker.

Understanding Fun Game Design ~ Case Study: Tetris

Understanding Fun Game Design ~ Case Study: Tetris

Lets get down to the lowest common denominator, something each and every one of us probably knows off by heart. I love Tetris. It's like a cultural institution in and of itself. The world could be ending and while some of us will be fighting off the minions of Satan and others will be ascending to paradise, the rest of us will probably be playing Tetris.

When I was young its not quite something I could come to understand. The pieces fall down and you try and move them so they don't pile up and hit the top of the screen, and then the Gameboy yells at you with a screech that sounds like an elf getting caught in his zipper. Simple enough? Not exactly. Tetris is actually far more complicated than it looks, and while its venire may appear basic, underneath is a whole net of meanings and systems that combine to make it what it is. The experiences it creates rival the greatest joys and the lowest despairs in life. One game can make you the dominator, the underdog, the underachiever, and the desperate. In a way, you don't play Tetris - Tetris plays you.

The game rules, as I said before, are simple enough. In basic ‘marathon' mode (labeled Type-A in the original Gameboy version, you play until you lose. “Tetroids,” groups of four contiguous blocks arranged in a variety of ways, fall from the top of the screen. In the confines of the space provided, you navigate them as to form lines. If a whole line is formed from side to side, the line clears and you get points. Not only this, but you can clear multiple lines at once, if you try. For every 10 lines you clear you go up a level, for every level you go up the game gets faster and faster. Usually around level 12, if you don't know what you're doing, the speed of the game will get the better of you and you will lose and proceed to cry like a little girl. For the love of God, pull yourself together.

The straightforwardness of this ludology is deceiving. How can this simple set of structures create such awesome low-level narrative experiences? This is what we're going to find out.

Lets start with the blocks. These pieces actually have no inherent meaning or value outside of the game. They are simply a set of all possible four-unit tetrads. What gives them their meaning is the way that they are used in the ludology (that usually means the ‘rules' for those of you who don't speak gamish yet.) There are the crooked ones, the L-shaped ones, and then the veritable pig in the Tetris pantry, the square one. There is actually a really complex brick-selection algorithm lying behind what seems like a random choice on behalf of the computer. Which brick you get next is out of your hands, but it is optimized to enhance your game play experience. But remember, the pieces are just abstract pieces. They have no value aside from that which we ascribe them in the context of the game. But, if I were to say “What is the most valuable piece in Tetris?” I bet you would say the straight piece. On this I would agree, but not because there is something about four well-aligned blocks which is inherently valuable. What makes it valuable how the game provides us with the opportunity for us to ascribe value to it.

What makes the straight piece valuable is the fact that it is the only block capable of creating a “Tetris”, a simultaneous four-line clearance. It's worth the most points, and you're rewarded by a cute little squeal from the game. If you are looking for points or for the quick level-up, the straight piece then becomes the lynchpin of your strategy. You will arrange the other blocks with a gap (a favorite tends to be a one-unit empty space on one side of the field). You anticipate it, you hope for it to come. If it does, you've completed a short term goal, and if it doesn't you might have to compromise or deal with the increasing difficult circumstance of managing the rest of the field while trying to keep the space open. At what point do you abandon it? Are you going to be disappointed or relieved? Satisfied or angered? The game has created the possibility for emotion to emerge through the way you play it. Creates an emotional experience simply and solely out of its ludology is, in my opinion, evidence of an excellent game design.

Lets look at another way the ludology creates emotion. Tetris makes use of a little game design trope I like to call the ‘multiplier factor.' As you progress through the game play experience, some variable which influences the pace of gameplay increases at a set rate. In Tetris, this is the speed at which the blocks descend into the playfield. Each time you clear 10 lines, you go up a level, and this speed increases. This, like anything else in the game, has no inherent value aside from that which we give it. The game speeding up is not presented as an inherently good thing or a bad thing; it's just simply part of the design. Yet, as the game speeds up, we find ourselves having to cope with the increasing pace. We start to think and act faster. Eventually the speed may get the better of us and we might not be able to keep up. You start to lose control, but you don't want to lose. You might feel anxiety or, if you are playing up near the top of the field, desperation. I have seen people nearly break their teeth by stressing so hard over those last few seconds of a lost game of Tetris. And they love it.

So, there we go. A thousand words on Tetris.

Uh... I think I just broke the site.

I submitted an article and now whenever I visit any page aside from the forums, I can see all the code pop up in a textbox thing on screen. I dunno if this is common, but it wierded me out so I thought I'd let the world know.

This is what shows up...
Close<h1>Add Article</h1> <div class="contents"> <form method="post" action=""> <div class="row"><div class="info"><label for="id_name">Name:</label></div><div class="field"><input type="text" name="name" class="text" /></div><div class="info"></div></div> <div class="row"><div class="info"><label for="id_category">Category:</label></div><div class="field"><select name="category" id="id_category"> <option value="10">Articles - Programming and Mathematics</option> <option value="1">Articles - Artist Workshop</option> <option value="2">Articles - Game Design and Theory</option> <option value="4">Articles - Writer&#39;s Block</option> <option value="5">Articles - Who Knows?</option> <option value="8">Tutorials - ika</option> <option value="6">Tutorials - RPG Maker 2000/2003</option> <option value="7">Tutorials - RPG Maker XP</option> <option value="9">Tutorials - Sphere</option> <option value="11">Tutorials - Game Maker</option> <option value="12">Tutorials - RPG Maker VX</option> </select></div><div class="info"></div></div> <div class="row"><div class="info"><label for="id_description">Description:</label></div><div class="field"><input type="text" name="description" class="text" /></div><div class="info"></div></div> <div class="row"><div class="info"><label for="id_contents">Contents:</label></div><div class="field"><textarea id="id_contents" rows="10" cols="40" name="contents"></textarea></div><div class="info"> BBCode Allowed<br></div></div> <div class="buttons"> <input class="button" type="submit" value="Continue"> </div> </form> </div>

EDIT: okay it went away nevermind situation normal

[Fun] Worldbuilding 2: Encycatlas of The Big Blue (aka Juvex Sector 76A2)

I thought we'd give this another whirl. The idea of the Ecycatlas is to build the history, geography, and culture of a choerent storyworld. The theme of this one is DEEP SPACE PIRATES!

1. Select a italicized term from a previous article.

2. Write an article for it. Try and include other terms and keep in mind what has been said already, so we don't have contradictions or incoherencies.

3. Include at least one new italicized term for someone else to write an article about.

4. Keep in ming this is WORLD BUILDING. If you decide to write an article, remember we are building a world, places, cultures, economies, creatures, peoples first and not theogonies or ephemerals.

5. As the OP, I'd like to reserve the say to exclude, retcon, or request rewrites of topics or terms. If they don't follow the rules, conflict with another article, or we have multiple submissions, in an effort to keep things contigous.

I will let someone else have a crack at the first article. Planets, pirates, political forces, types of hypermount cannons, alien races, sorts of hats, its up to you.

... k go.
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