EMMYCH'S PROFILE

author=EdgeOfChaos
Is it just me or does "queer" still sound like a insult (even though it was declared Politically Correct™ by the lgbt movement)

It originally was a word used by LGB folks to describe their identities. It was then co-opted by straight people to be used as a slur. LGB people have be reclaiming it because it was historically our word to use, but there is a lot of debate within the community, because some folks still feel it is a slur/have had it used as a slur against them. I use it because it better describes my identity for reasons I'm not going to go into here.

Short version is this handy flowchart: are you straight? -> Don't use it.

author=Feldschlact IV
And it's totally fine that you don't know. I'm just saying that you have to examine these situations in context when you're discussing them. Is an opinion like CashmereCat's an opinion that can lead down a much darker, road? Sure. But I'd wager that Cash is several steps (if not the whole staircase) away from say, the Westboro Baptist Church or worse, and he's probably an otherwise decent guy with a bigoted opinion based off a background of ignorance and unfamiliarity.

See, this is the thing that always gets me: you realize that peoples opinions are never just opinions, right? This isn't a topic like "I hate random battles so I won't have them in my game!!" This is literally an opinion that has historically impacted people's lives. People thinking homosexuality is a sin is what prevented governments from taking action during the AIDS crisis. It's what saw countless LGBT people institutionalized, as in, literally put into mental hospitals and tortured for being queer. It's what can still get LGBT people fired, even in places like where I live where firing someone for their sexuality or gender is illegal.

These awful things are allowed to exist because groups of people think it's okay. So, yeah, of course I'm gonna get frustrated when I see people crashing into threads of celebration and saying that people like me are inherently sinful (and therefore doomed to burn in hell). Like, for people late to the party:

author=CashmereCat
I know you guys are gonna hate me for this, but I'm a Christian and I believe homosexuality is a sin, so I'm against the institutionalization and normalization of it.

I'm not exaggerating here? Like the word Sin literally came up. So here's the thing: I don't have to like this guy. I am actually 100% within my rights to say "nope I want nothing to do with this jerk because of their shitty beliefs". Yes, that's uncomfortable, but you know what? I don't care. CashmereCat is willing to judge my entire life based on who I love, so honestly: why should I give them the time of day? There are plenty of other smart and talented people who aren't also bigots for me to talk to.

author=Feldschlacht IV
Besides, this isn't inherently a 'safe space'. If Cash walked into a pride rally and said 'YEAH YOU GAYS' sure yeah GTFO, but this a an open forum for discussing a subject that was/is implied that all people can take part in, yes, even people with dissenting opinions.

This is actually a great example of the kinds of bullshit queer folks need to wade through, because hey, guess what? This wasn't an open forum for discussing the merits of homosexuality. It was a celebration. Cash DID crash into a queer friendly thread and leak their bigotry everywhere. It ain't cool.

Anyways, like I said before, I love myself, so I'm outta here! Here's hoping you all have a good convo.

I wasn't originally gonna go back and check this thread because I love myself and I'm still not sorry for telling off someone who deemed my existence a sin, but I gotta say somethin' here.

LockeZ, I've got a bone to pick with you, because you are mega misquoting me. I don't even remember the exact context of that quote (or even where you found it? Like how old is that?), but you obviously missed the point. My identity as queer person is EXTREMELY important to me, because it shapes the way I move through the world. Sexuality, whether it be straight or some flavour of queer, is important. Straight folks, you think yours isn't important, but it actually is: it's a free pass to let you navigate the world unafraid of violence or judgement. And guess what? Same-sex marriage isn't the end of that stigma for LGB folks, so you still get that free pass while I'll be hanging around here enjoying my heaping helpings of homophobia. And I'm in Canada! We've had same-sex marriage legalized for 10 years, folks!

What I was talking about in that post is that someone having a different gender/sexuality/race/whatever shouldn't be a barrier for identifying with them. I didn't say these things don't matter, because they do! They matter a lot. I take great issue with someone using my words to make a point I 100% disagree with, so I'm gonna have to gently tell you to knock it off.

Also yup Penta is right I am a they/them, so use those, everyone. Thanks.

EDIT:

author=Adon237
but in all honesty CashmereCat is an amazing RMN user with a lot to offer us, his comment didn't bother me at all! it really wasn't all that inflammatory.

By welcoming people with toxic views into spaces that are supposed to be inclusive, you make the space exclusive in a way that almost always favours bigots and pushes out the people who are being harmed.

Someone you could root for if they didn't do that thing that made them worth fighting against, if you want them to be sympathetic.

Alternately, someone who is charismatic enough to be entertaining, but whom you just LOATHE AND DESPISE and want to see lose. This is why I make my villains bourgeois scum.

I also played this game and p much agree with everything Penta put here! I just thought I would piggyback on a couple points:

author=Pentagon_Buddy
Saying “trigger warning” without any other description is useless. Trigger warning for what? I appreciate the thought behind warning potential players, but there’s no reason to beat around the bush.

I've seen this a few times on this site, tbh! The "TRIGGER WARNING" followed by... nothing. This makes me think people aren't really sure what triggers are.

A trigger can be anything. Literally anything. One of my triggers is a certain fruity shampoo that I'll hopefully never know the name of, because hey side-eyeing that every time I buy shampoo would suck. That smell -- or the memory of that smell -- is enough to make me feel FUCKING AWFUL.

Generally, when people put trigger warnings on things, they stick to specific stuff, like rape, or abuse, or neck wounds, eye wounds, talk of disordered eating, etc. Things that are pretty common topics that folks would want to avoid. The point of trigger warnings is to enable people to make an educated choice about the kind of media they want to interact with.

I know people want to keep trigger warnings like this a ~secret~ because they think it's a spoiler. Let me just tell you now: if the twist of your story is "AND THEN THEY WERE RAPED," you're doing a shitty job portraying rape. Penta covers it here: rape as a shocking plot device is Bad Writing. Good Writing is what happens AFTER the rape -- how someone deals with that trauma. Because, again, as Penta said: trauma is not what defines a person. It is simply a Thing they carry and grow with. Which brings me to the second thing I wanted to talk about:

author=Pentagon_Buddy
When you’re trying to move on with your life, it’s demoralizing to hear that <trauma defines you>. It’s insulting to everyone who works so very hard to live their lives and prosper despite what they have experienced.

There's a reason a lot of survivors of rape call themselves survivors. It's the same reason a lot of other survivors of trauma call themselves survivors: because they survived. They were not beaten by this awful thing that happened to them. They kept moving forward.

So I will reiterate that writing a story that shows trauma as The End for a person is not only INCREDIBLY insulting, but also inaccurate!

Trauma is something I like to explore in my own writing, if only because it's a topic that's near and dear to my heart. There is a lot of interesting stuff to be explored in the survival of trauma! That is where you get to the meat of things and make it about the character, rather than the audience's voyeuristic observation of someone's misery.

Basically yeah pls make better games about trauma and stop making games about rape if you're not willing to do some homework about rape.

impa and zelda for life, man