RMN ISLAND: YOU CAN STILL JOIN, MMKAY

@solarlune His name is Bob, though I didn't actually say it, it's in your items.

You can name it something else if you'd like.

I wish I could talk...

This could end badly but... I'll drop my weapon and try to telepathically tell him not to attack. If that doesn't work then at least give him a meaningful look that says "don't attack, we can work this out!"

We're waiting for Dudesoft I believe!

I may try to write some of these out if he doesn't post by the next time I get on the computer. I can't really write Wes's without him though.

author=Dudesoft
Hold my Pretty Chill Staff to the throat of the old man and activate a cool mist-

...Did you call ME an old man?

I'm in denial about myself.

So I head over to the shack, knock on the door politely and deliver the mermaid's message. I don't anticipate any resistance.

Also, my name is Don. It would be best to remember it. :P

This man seems rather dangerous, but if I can make him trust me then he probably won't kill me. After all, I don't want to die or anything.

Okay... I'll tell Yodeel to tell the man that I'm going to hand that strange Jeffrey-sword-thing back to him and maybe throw in a little "don't kill us" in there too. Then I will CAREFULLY AND CALMLY pick up the sword and hand it to him. And it would be helpful if Yodeel could explain a little more. Like, at least tell the guy that I can't talk right now.

<3 Round 15 <3
There's love abound this round <3

Dic
(2) (2) (5)

You logically conclude you're no use to your friends here and get to fleeing! You attempt to go back to the top of the tree for some sap, but the Sandler bots block the way and scare you off. Resigning yourself to your current inventory, you hand Zane the strength potion and he gobbles it up bottle and all.
"Mmmmm~<3" he moans happily. "Hope one!" he orders you and you make no objections.
You ride him to the lowest part of the tree you can get to by walking and he begins descending. All is well and fine until halfway down you both realize Sandler bots are approaching you from below! Using your quick wit, you reach into Zane's mouth and take out a long sharp tooth - don't worry gobblers don't feel pain in their mouths. Zane proceeds to climb down and as the bots attempt to attack the two of you, you knock each of them down. You send three spiraling to their deaths before you realize you've reached the bottom. You collect your spoils from the remains of the bots and you both run off into the night.

The next morning, you and your pal wake up in the middle of a savanna. It's complete with harsh dry grass and you can only spot maybe 5 tress in the area. You notice some kind of creature prowling about nearby. In fact, it seems to be hunting for you! Its malicious intent is clear, but you have no time to run! It pounces... but you're fine. It was just a silly looking meerkat. It holds a stick with a stone tied to the end. Zane gives you a tap and you look down at him.
"Can eye eke him?"
You're not sure if he wants to eat it or keep it...

::Items::
Zane the Tree Gobbler (+1 Climbing, +1 Luck, -1 Combat)
Manly Adam Style Leaf (+1 Persuasion, -1 Recruiting)
Lightweight Crooked Tunic (+1 Defense, +1 Movement)
Golf Club (+1 Combat)
Perfectly White Shoes (+1 Movement)

::Status::
-Rad Savanna in Rad Flats-
Sap-born!
Comprehending Zane is taking some effort...
Naturally technically inclined. (+1 Competence)

June
(6)

You shoot at the lock and manage to break it. Unfortunately, however, the bullet ricochets off the metal door behind it and you shoot in the head! Luckily, you can't feel anything and your rock hard badassery prevents it from being fatal. Instead, you simply have a slightly off-putting bullet jutting out your upper eyebrow area.
"Cool, a new piercing~<3" you gush happily as you pull out the mirror you had tucked away.

That small detail aside, you can now enter the locked room and you do so. The door doesn't protest being opened with the lock gone and in fact opens easily. Within lays a bustling lab. Or at least, that's what you assume it had been before this. It's a wreck of a room with some hairy apes roaming around. That's not a derogatory term, by the way, they're literally monkeys. The off part here is that they're wearing lab jackets and playing with clipboards that appear to have important meaning to the company. Were the research monkeys here turned into LITERAL monkeys? It seems god is fond of irony. If they were, there are probably no scientists here that can help you. Maybe the reactor here is still of use? Though, it's a maze up in the grating above - you'll need to have some way of getting to the reactor without getting lost if you do still nab it. Perhaps it's best to return to the cafe and see if Gonzales has any leads?

:Status::
-Radiation City; Nuclear Plant Lab Wreck, Cleveland-
Chewin' bubble gum and kickin' butt.
Ye olde punk attitude (+1 Luck)
Natural aura (+2 Stealth)
Your tongue hurts.

::Items::
Companion: Slave (+1 Recruiting, +1 Luck, -1 Competition)
5x Minty Green Gum (Guarantees a good outcome if you chew this while doing something)
Juanito's Sunglasses (+1 Stealth)
Nose Ring (+2 Persuasion)
Dual Holster Guns (+2 Combat)
Bullet "Piercing" (-1 Recruiting, +1 Persuasion)
Hot Pink Punk Bike (Allows for movement from section to section)
Radiation Resistant Gloves (Resists radiation)
Sleeping Meal (A meal that seems to be drugged with a sleeping medicine!)
Broken Lock (You shot it just right - you can probably lock something with this if need be.)

Mob
(4) (5)

Your taco army gets to work clearing out the Sandler bots! Their meat is kinda spilling out, but all the more fro you, right? As for Garbabarps, he's completely recovered this round so he has no problem obliterating the remaining Sandler bots. With a series of bright red missiles, he massacres the remainder of the army which visually looks like a fantasia of red and cold blue! With this eye pleaser - you've won!

Finally, the area is relatively calm and you can get to creating your fast food empire! Jennifer made sure none of the injuries were serious and she guarded the supplies perfectly with Mudhound. However the taco army was meant for long time lives! Your shop is filled to the brim with taco meat and Sandler bots. I doubt very many people will want to eat here with this mess.

::Status::
-Within the War Spittoon by The Divide, Regicidal State of Ass-Spooning-
Shown up by a gum-chewing girl forever more~<3
A spunky go-getter who can't operate pants!
Who even cares about the manager anymore?
The war has been won!
Taco soldiers are no longer...

::Items::
-$85-
Pact: LockeZ (+1 Stealth when in same section or when location is unknown)
Companion: Jennifer Aniston (+2 Recruiting)
Companion: Mudhound; the Bane of Clean Floors (+1 Movement, +1 Combat)
Companion: MARMITE WABBLEGARPS, THE BANE OF CANS and Can-opener Sponge Warrior (+1 Gathering)
Companion: SERGEANT BRAMBLE GARBABARPS the Missile Launcher Sponge Gladiator (+1 Combat)
Companions: Musclebound Patty Cake Twins (+1 Combat, -1 Movement)
Bidet Pipe (+1 Combat Roll)
Gravity Boots (Allow for very high jumping +1 Movement)
Mixed Buffalo Meat (Edible!)
Flame Gloves (Allows you to cast fire magic and summon tacos in battle! +1 Luck)
x5 Tools and Weapons (+1 Combat to all allies, +1 Recruiting to you)
x2 Tacos (These were for warm-up, but they'll make a good treat!)

Wes
(4) (2)

You shoot Yodeel an annoyed look and she laughs awkwardly as if to say sorry. Then she begins talking.
"You better not be lying." he says coolly.
"Sorry, I was a little nervous with you pointing that staff at me... My friend over here can't speak and I can read his mind. His name is Wes - I'm Yodeel. We came here because we're looking for a darker lady with a red scarf. She's a wanted fugitive. It's...very important. Anyway, he wants to give you your sword so don't kill him or anything." she makes a little face that looks like she's afraid that he's not going to like that response.
You go to give him the sword but something stops you while it's in your hands.

Suddenly the floor groans loudly and it looks like it's going to up and disappear. It shimmers maliciously and you sink a little into the ground. When the floor becomes solid again, you find yourself stuck into the ground from the chest up. Your arms are also in the floor which means...you've trapped Jeffrey in the floor with you. You realize the man and Yodeel didn't sink. Luckily, you're both still in a position to breathe.

"It's just one thing after another..." Jeffrey moans.

"He said 'Shit.'" Yodeel giggles as she reads your mind. "Don't worry, I'll get you out of there, Wessy."

::Status::
-A strange ice castle in Cleveland-
Being hunted by your shadow...
Unable to talk.
You're stuck in the floor, but there's no pain.
That strange sword, Jeffrey, is stuck with you.

::Items::
-$10-
Barbed Sword (+1 Combat, +1 Competence)
Generic Bow x5 Arrows (+1 Combat when used)
Adventurer's Clothes (+1 Competition)
Companion: Rock Suit Norman (+1 Combat/Defending Rolls, -1 Movement Rolls)
Companion: Yodeel the PIMP ( +1 Persuasion, +1 Competition, -1 Recruiting)
Companion: Hump-Mat the Flying Shag Carpet (Allows for free movement between sections of the island, +1 Movement)

Don
(4)

You take a pleasant stroll to the shack. Once on the small porch, you knock lightly. A man emerges from the door and he puts on a nice smile. He has jet black hair that's slicked up. He wears some sort of red soldier's uniform. It looks to be for show rather than actual use. His chin is cleft and he radiates kindness.
"Yes?"
"There's someone by the waterfall who'd like to speak with you." you shoot him a smile too, though you feel like a joke compared to someone so...put together perhaps?
"Oh!" he looks surprised. "I forgot! I'm going to be late, thanks a bunch. Here have this money as thanks." he presses something into your palm and runs off. You're jumping in joy until the witch speaks.
"Clear your head, that's not the item he said."
You look down in your hand and realize she's right. Rather than money, you had some kind of brooch given to you. It's a bright red flower in appearance and it sparkles in the light. Though, that man probably didn't mean to give that to you. You find yourself outside an unlocked unsupervised home... Feeling naughty? It may be best to return the brooch though. Besides, don't you want to see how things turned out?

::Status::
-Inero Soldier Shack in Kansas-
Your knuckles are feelin' good!
Not a drop of mud is left on you!
Naughty Don is naughty?

::Items::
Companion: The Witch, no need to know her name! (Can cast magic, +1 Luck)
Companion: Bob the Lava Suit (+1 Defending, -1 Movement)
Witch's Broom (Allows you to travel sections of the island freely!)
Plumber's Clothes (+1 Competence)
Bone Sword (+1 Combat Roll, +1 Persuasion)
Spiritual Chocolate Floor Chunk (+1 Defending)
Witch's Slingshot x20 Ammo (+1 combat when used)
Cookies~<3 x4 (Good if you need energy)
Bottle of Scream (I wonder what the best octave is...)
Petrified Broom (Perhaps there's a way to un-petrify this?)
Rainbow Rock (+1 Luck)
Invaluable Rose Brooch (Holding it gives you the feeling of happiness and immense sadness all at once. Is this imbued with magic?)

Dudes

"I've had my share of deceit today. You best not be lying!" you say with an edge in your voice.

The girl laugh's an innocent and very cute laugh. Her eyes light up.
"I'm so sorry, dude! See, my buddy here can't speak and I have to talk for him. I read his mind and speak for him." She holds both of her hands up to her chest over her heart. "I'm Yodeel. He is Wes. We came here looking for a girl with dark skin - she's wearing a red scarf. Now, Wes over there would like to hand you your sword. Don' hurt anyone, okay?"
She takes in air and smiles somewhat flirtatiously at you.

Suddenly, the ground begins shaking and shimmering. It's disappearing! Before you can react, you hear a girly yelp and feel a body jump to you for safety. She knocks you out of the air and right when the ground becomes solid you both land on it. You look at the girl in your arms and she blushes. However, you have a problem - Jeffrey and Wes have been ensnared in the floor.

"Dudes, not to get in the way of you and your girl over there or anything, but I'd appreciate some help if you would."

Yodeel springs up from out of your arms and speaks:
"Shit. Um, that's what Wes said. Don't worry, Wes, we'll save you."

She looks at you with the most adorable eyes as if to say "We can do this."


::Status:
-On the other side of Deep Deep Chasm in Cleveland. Whose Ice Castle is it Anyway?!-
A never soft dude.
Yodeel may or may not be coming on to you.
Whether you leave or it disappears, you're nearly done here.

::Items::
Companion: Jeffrey, the Speaking Hybrid Blade (+1 Combat, +1 Competence, +1
Climbing, Allows you to use Maria's power still~)
Temporary Companion: Yodeel the Adorable ( +1 Persuasion, +1 Competition, -1 Recruiting)
Attractive Aviator Suit (+1 Persuasion Roll)
Gentleman's Top hat (+1 Recruiting)
Pretty Chill Staff (Allows you to use ice and cold water magic, Also good for ice statues coincidentally.)
Steroid Staff (Allows you to use the magic of flames and smoke through channeling your masculinity)
Ever Blue Claw (+1 Combat, +1 Climbing)
x1 Very Large Sandy Mat
x1 Sword Sharpener (One use, adds +1 Combat to swords)

I can raid his house later... for now, I'll run after him and give him back his brooch!

Call it thanks for raiding his house later.