APRILSCHILD'S PROFILE

Considering all I do all day long is write dialogue, I like this topic.

The first trick to writing good dialogue is to listen to people. Go out into a cafe and write down what people say (if you're fast enough, it takes practice). I can't tell you guys how many times I've had to do this. But it helps.

Second, try and write the least like the movies/games as possible. If you are imitating the style of a particular game, you are imitating an imitation. You won't get it spot on - you'll just be farther removed from reality.

Third, whoever said exposition is good is wrong, but you're saying that already. What you are describing is not actually exposition. Exposition is bad and should always be avoided.

Exposition:

Guy 1: Oh my God, my head, where am I? I can't remember a thing!
Guy 2: You are the in the caverns of Wind Falls, where one hundred years ago, a mystical summoner called forth a demon to wreak havoc on the people of the nearby village, Pleasant Springs.
Guy 1: I remember now! The demon moved beyond the summoner's sphere of influence and continued to destroy towns in his path. For decades he moved from village to village, only killing innocents in his path! MY PARENTS WERE KILLED BY THIS DEMON!
Guy 2: Well I'm glad your amnesia cleared up, at least.

NOT Exposition:

Guy 1: Oh my God, my head, where am I? I can't remember a thing!
Guy 2: Don't worry, friend, I'll tend your wounds.
Guy 1: Wait just one minute, pal, get your hands off of me. I want some answers. First: where the hell is this place?
Guy 2: *Sighs.* You're in the caverns of Wind Falls. Now, may I get back to my work? That run-in you had with the Demon left you in quite a state.
Guy 1: DEMON?
Guy 2: Rest, for now. I'll tell you more once you've recovered.

Not the greatest of all examples, but still, one is exposition and the other is not.

Fourth, on the issue of dithering: to better strike a medieval fantasy mood, include minimal dithering. The occasional stutter is acceptable, but it's quite obvious that people did not say "like" back in the day. Also, to the reader, the more posh guys sound, the more old-timey we read them. However, if you're going for a modern or future setting, throw in a few more "ums," but only when they would be said. It doesn't do (um) any good (um) to (um) toss them in every (um) five seconds. Just, uh... put them where they belong.

Fifth, PRACTICE PRACTICE PRACTICE. If you want to hone your skills in anything, do it often. Eventually speech will become more natural to you.

author=brandonabley link=topic=2619.msg50190#msg50190 date=1228939752

author=Craze link=topic=2619.msg50183#msg50183 date=1228937290
brandon, if you send me money every week I will ship you home-cooked meals.

I would probably be afraid to eat them (calories).

Setting aside the dangerous implications of this statement, which you've already touched on...

Home cooked meals are way better for calorie counting than anything else in the world. If you know where to shop, you can make sure everything you're putting into your food is low-cal and delicious. My mom and dad lost 50 lbs each just by looking at labels and making their own food more often (and working out)... yeah. And it's delicious, too. I miss home cooked meals for how healthy they can be :(. There's nothing like chicken noodle from scratch as a low-cal meal in the winter.

Calorie counting is good when it isn't an obsession... which it can turn into quickly. But that's an entirely different topic.

This looks pretty cool, but I'm also gearing up for the throwdown between you and Max McGee who is making a very very similar game (Everyone loves Fallout, it seems). I'm curious to see what the differences will be between Aftermath and Everything Turns Grey.

READY? FIGHT.

I wonder if this would be better served as a convention meet-up, like a certain event people would be at anyway, and would be able to get together for dinner or something. ???

I think Blackberries do that kind of thing, but I don't really know, since I don't own one.

I only use my iPod for music so I have no idea if that works.

I'd go with what Brandon said, I've got an LG Rumor and it works fine for helping me remember all my stuff. I don't know, though; if your wife is so busy she fills up her daily planner, a phone might not cut it. You might have to go more heavy-duty.