APRILSCHILD'S PROFILE

I like her ;D

In fact, I think all your stuff is quite good.

author=Fallen-Griever link=topic=2590.msg71053#msg71053 date=1239956677
"That the Technocracy at the start even let your character live doesn't really make sense so the premise for your character wondering around in the first place is slightly weak. ..."

This is what I was referring to when I said, just because something doesn't immediately make sense, it doesn't mean it's a bad choice/incorrect choice in terms of story. The character of the Captain has a reason for sparing your character... just because you don't know what that reason is, doesn't mean it's bad storytelling.

If you thought it was clunky for some reason, I respect that, but also respectfully disagree. It piqued my interest and I wanted to know what the characters' father's relationship is with the Captain. It's BECAUSE it didn't make sense that I felt this way. If it made perfect sense it wouldn't be much of a mystery/story, would it?

author=Fallen-Griever link=topic=2590.msg70994#msg70994 date=1239917667
This was more the part I was getting at. The scene achieves the aim (I said as much in my review), but it is kinda like Paris Hilton getting publicity for stumbling out of a limo half-naked; it achieves the aim but does not do so in a graceful way. The scene just seems really rushed, and I personally think that if you sit down and make the dialogue less one-dimensional it will be a lot better. Right now the scene is too obvious; there isn't any disguise or... panache? I guess. The scene doesn't even have to change much, just changing the dialogue between the hero and the Captain would be enough to make a big impact on the whole thing. For me, right now, the Captain doesn't look like he even has a reason to spare the hero when he obviously must do since that is the point of the scene being there in the first place and... whatever.

It envoke the thought "why did he do that", but it is more "why did he do that, that was a stupid, comic-book villain thing to do" rather than" why did he do that, it seems really interesting". I don't think that even makes sense... It doesn't really hurt the game much either way; the gameplay is the focus and that is pretty brilliant so far.

Considering there are numerous different choices of conversation between "___"(main character) and the Captain, it's kind of unfair to say "this convo isn't any good" because the player is given several different options for what to even say.

I thought this scene was actually the most interesting part of the game, and not at all the dialogue equivalent of Paris Hilton. That's a pretty cold thing to say.

Just because you don't understand why someone has done something, doesn't mean they don't have a reason. I'm certain that if Max does finish this game, there will be a story included that explains this in a way that will make the player think "oh wow, so that's what that's all about." In fact, being turned off by a story because you don't immediately understand all its mysteries is being a little obtuse.

I've read a lot of Max's work and I trust him entirely with a story and its progression. There's plenty of times he's written things that made me think, "oh God, why did that character say/do that, it makes me so mad, it doesn't make any sense!" and then if I stay with it a little longer, I have the biggest, "OHHHH" moment ever. Those moments, where you truly weren't expecting it but it casts light IMMEDIATELY on everything previous, are much more valuable than cheap hollywood "twists" that everyone can see coming.

Also, for the sake of argument, wouldn't it be WAY MORE COMIC BOOK SUPERVILLAIN-Y if the captain had a long monologue about "You are the chosen one, blah blah blah, I will not kill you, but you must come find me in my EVIL LAIR OF TECHNOCRACY to learn the true meaning of this..."? The dude probably doesn't have the time to stand around in a nuclear wasteland chatting about "oh yeah, how's your dad doing?"

author=TooManyToasters link=topic=2590.msg70512#msg70512 date=1239641543

author=RockmanNeo link=topic=2590.msg70166#msg70166 date=1239317895
RMVX isn't really my thing (at all)

This is an absolutely terrible thing to say.

This game is pretty cool, but I have a few beefs. A) First time I used the battle radio the game crashed because it couldn't find Dropkick Murphys- State of Massachusetts and B) this game is fucking hard and when I say fucking hard I mean fucking hard. I can't go through 2 fights in the Ruined Barn without getting raped and mugged by mutants. Running away works about 10% of the time (and you might want to fix the "However, it was unable to escape!" engrish in the Vocab).
Perhaps I should have picked Protector instead of Mechanique.

Go get a party member. >.>

author=S. F. LaValle link=topic=3464.msg70340#msg70340 date=1239463709
Agreed! Except I guess I find writing fun, too (when there's motivation to write).

Looking at your work, it's obvious that you enjoy what you do. Like I said before, you have a great eye for design!

Aww, thanks!!! #^.^# Yeah, writing can be fun... I guess I just find things more enjoyable when they aren't necessary or if I don't take them too seriously.

I agree, everyone's entries are looking good.