TW0FACE'S PROFILE
Tw0Face
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I'm an indie videogame developer from Germany and I've been making games for several years now.
Find all my games here:
https://twofacegames.itch.io
Find all my games here:
https://twofacegames.itch.io
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[RMVX ACE] Please help me proofread my Tutorial
@Marrend: Players don't have to wait for the Farmers to stockpile Food/Vegetables. You have to craft it on your own at specific locations using your Farmers. (You need some tools to do so btw. that can be purchased in shops or got as a result of battle later) The idea is to let the player craft as many Food as he can depending on how much Farmers he has. Like this. If the player has 5 Farmers, he can harvest 5 Food per day, for example. After doing so, their Farmers are exhausted. When a new day dawns, they can harvest again. You have to do some steps until the next day starts which gives you enough time to do some other stuff in the meantime (create other buildings, train, battle, etc.)
In the tutorial there will only be 5 Villagers. There will be more later. Therefore, the clock is introduced and explained at the end of the tutorial.
I hope this gives you a proper idea on how gameplay will work in this game. :)
In the tutorial there will only be 5 Villagers. There will be more later. Therefore, the clock is introduced and explained at the end of the tutorial.
I hope this gives you a proper idea on how gameplay will work in this game. :)
[RMVX ACE] Please help me proofread my Tutorial
[RMVX ACE] Please help me proofread my Tutorial
Sorry, forgot that. The clock is introduced at the end of the tutorial after you were told that you can build a sawmill using your stolen Lumber. :) Therefore, the player cannot know before.
[RMVX ACE] Please help me proofread my Tutorial
I forgot something. My game has a day and night system and I have to explain the clock (GUI) as well. Is this one okay? I'm sure it can be written in a better way maybe?
"Did you see, milord? A (day and night) clock has appeared at the top right of the screen. It will help you to identify the phases of the day. Time only passes when you move your character. Some in-game actions can only be performed at a specific time of day. (day or night) At the start of each new day, more people will wait outside the capital's gates and ask for your approval to enter the city, milord. Make sure to recruit them to always have enough Villagers."
Madness Fantasy
Towerø Review
[RMVX ACE] Please help me proofread my Tutorial
author=Marrend
With 4, what's the difference between Vegetables and Food? I largely suspect they are actually referring to the same thing.
Yes, that's right. Thanks for reminding me to keep it consistent. Of course, it means the same. Vegetables is Food.
author=Marrend
Does terrain where people can work have certain modifiers to what resources can be pulled from them? What I'm kinda inferring from what I can see of the writing, is that there could be delegated places to producing certain kinds of resources, similar to Warcraft, or Starcraft. So, like, the Miners would be sent to an Ore Mine, Stonemasons would be sent to a Stone Quarry, and Farmers would be sent to a Berry Patch, or what-have-you.
I don't know exactly how it is handled in Warcraft or Starcraft, but it works somewhat like that: You have to build a Sawmill to train Lumberjacks. After doing so and having some jacks trained, you can process Lumber from anywhere on the World Map, in places where mature trees can be found.
[RMVX ACE] Please help me proofread my Tutorial
Thanks again, Marrend. Your help is much appreciated.
The titles of the individual quests are now as follows. These should summarize what needs to be done in each individual section of the tutorial.
I'm quite sure about 1 and 5, but maybe you want to give some feedback on the writing of 2, 3 and 4? I want everything to be correct and sound naturally. Players should be able to understand everything perfectly.
That is exactly what I want to do. Thank you. :)
The titles of the individual quests are now as follows. These should summarize what needs to be done in each individual section of the tutorial.
Quest 1: "Build a Farmhouse."
Quest 2: "Visit the Capital and look for people at the Gate."
Quest 3: "Return to the Farmhouse to train Farmers."
Quest 4: "Find a suitable place to harvest Vegetables."
Quest 5: "Attack the orcish settlement and take their supplies."
Quest 2: "Visit the Capital and look for people at the Gate."
Quest 3: "Return to the Farmhouse to train Farmers."
Quest 4: "Find a suitable place to harvest Vegetables."
Quest 5: "Attack the orcish settlement and take their supplies."
I'm quite sure about 1 and 5, but maybe you want to give some feedback on the writing of 2, 3 and 4? I want everything to be correct and sound naturally. Players should be able to understand everything perfectly.
author=Marrend
*Edit: Like, you probably want the message to stay consistent between the context of being in the tutorial, and normal gameplay. Hence the use of the game-variable in the message.
That is exactly what I want to do. Thank you. :)
[RMVX ACE] Please help me proofread my Tutorial
@Marrend: This is an interesting way to do it. Thanks a lot. :)
Any idea how to rewrite this part:
It sounds a bit dull to me.
In your case it doesn't really matter, as you already appear in my credits list for helping me out with two scripts. :)
Any idea how to rewrite this part:
"In front of the gates of the capital, 5 people ask for permission as they want to settle in the city. Let them in? (Yes/No)"
It sounds a bit dull to me.
author=Marrend
I feel there is no need to credit me, if you use this, though. I do this kind of thing all the time.
In your case it doesn't really matter, as you already appear in my credits list for helping me out with two scripts. :)
[RMVX ACE] Please help me proofread my Tutorial
I've designed a playable tutorial for my project and I'm now looking for people to proofread the text. The tutorial is pretty much the most important part in the game to get a feeling for what awaits you. I want it to be grammatically correct and sound natural. It should sound motivating and make the player want to play. I'm aware that maybe a lot will have to be changed. I'm okay with that.
The game is a medieval citybuilder. The king has just arrived at the beach with his ship. He's welcomed by a resident soldier. That's when the tutorial starts. It's a step by step tutorial, so that's why the text is divided into several sections.
Greetings, my lord. I hope you had a pleasant journey. The capital has awaited your arrival. Since the orcs and dwarves have conquered large parts of the land, it has become increasingly difficult for us to maintain the reputation of the capital. Our economic power has fallen dramatically. We currently can't produce resources and food. Ah, I see that you have a few resources with you? We should urgently set up a Farmhouse to provide food for our people.
Move the cursor using the arrow keys. Confirm a selection with SPACE. Press ESC to open the main menu, where you can view your resources and save your game.
In the course of the game, you'll build an ever growing settlement. Every worker of your tribe will do their part to produce more resources - Vegetables, Lumber, Ore and more - to further this growth. Do you see the empty plot of land in front of you? A Farmhouse can be built there. Hitting SPACE on an empty plot of land will bring up a screen giving you more information on what resources are needed to create a building there. To build some facilities, however, you'll need a certain amount of Reputation as well. Our Reputation is currently 500. That will do it. Go on and build a Farmhouse.
Congratulations. Have you noticed that your Reputation has increased by 300 points due to the construction of the Farmhouse? You now own a Farmhouse, but this alone does nothing. You first have to train Farmers to start producing Food. This is only possible if you have villagers. Walk east and see if people at the gates ask to enter the capital.
In front of the gates of the capital, 5 people ask for permission as they want to settle in the city. Let them in? (Yes/No)
You now have 5 villagers. They are an important resource because you can train them to become Farmers, Mineworkers, Stonemasons or Blacksmiths. Once trained for a specific task, they can't change their job. Decide wisely. Check every day to see if new people are waiting in front of the capital's gates to enter. Now return to the Farmhouse and turn these 5 villagers into 5 Farmers.
Excellent. You have trained 5 Farmers. As you can see, training Villagers to become workers also consumes Food. That said, Food is the most important resource in the game. You can't train Villagers without having Food. Now we want to find fields where the Farmers can harvest Food. Watch out for fields that have produced ripe crops.
Very good. We now have a basic stock of Food. As you can see, each Farmer can harvest 1x Food per day. After doing so, they're are exhausted and have to rest. You may train more Farmers to increase your daily production.
Another important resource is Lumber. Lumber is required to build almost every building. Currently we don't own a Sawmill. Therefore we cannot train any Lumberjacks yet. We also need Lumber to build a Sawmill. Bad situation, hm? Since we don't have any Lumber, we have to steal some. See that orc settlement back there? We have to attack them and steal their supplies.
Very good. Now we have enough Lumber to build a Sawmill. Once we have trained Lumberjacks then, we can produce our own wood. Now you know the basics of the game. I'll leave you to play on your own from now on. Build up our economy and save the country.
The text isn't that long. I always try to keep it short. I would be happy if someone helps me with proofreading. I would include you in the credits under "Writing".
Thanks a lot. :)
- Tw0Face
The game is a medieval citybuilder. The king has just arrived at the beach with his ship. He's welcomed by a resident soldier. That's when the tutorial starts. It's a step by step tutorial, so that's why the text is divided into several sections.
Greetings, my lord. I hope you had a pleasant journey. The capital has awaited your arrival. Since the orcs and dwarves have conquered large parts of the land, it has become increasingly difficult for us to maintain the reputation of the capital. Our economic power has fallen dramatically. We currently can't produce resources and food. Ah, I see that you have a few resources with you? We should urgently set up a Farmhouse to provide food for our people.
Move the cursor using the arrow keys. Confirm a selection with SPACE. Press ESC to open the main menu, where you can view your resources and save your game.
In the course of the game, you'll build an ever growing settlement. Every worker of your tribe will do their part to produce more resources - Vegetables, Lumber, Ore and more - to further this growth. Do you see the empty plot of land in front of you? A Farmhouse can be built there. Hitting SPACE on an empty plot of land will bring up a screen giving you more information on what resources are needed to create a building there. To build some facilities, however, you'll need a certain amount of Reputation as well. Our Reputation is currently 500. That will do it. Go on and build a Farmhouse.
Congratulations. Have you noticed that your Reputation has increased by 300 points due to the construction of the Farmhouse? You now own a Farmhouse, but this alone does nothing. You first have to train Farmers to start producing Food. This is only possible if you have villagers. Walk east and see if people at the gates ask to enter the capital.
In front of the gates of the capital, 5 people ask for permission as they want to settle in the city. Let them in? (Yes/No)
You now have 5 villagers. They are an important resource because you can train them to become Farmers, Mineworkers, Stonemasons or Blacksmiths. Once trained for a specific task, they can't change their job. Decide wisely. Check every day to see if new people are waiting in front of the capital's gates to enter. Now return to the Farmhouse and turn these 5 villagers into 5 Farmers.
Excellent. You have trained 5 Farmers. As you can see, training Villagers to become workers also consumes Food. That said, Food is the most important resource in the game. You can't train Villagers without having Food. Now we want to find fields where the Farmers can harvest Food. Watch out for fields that have produced ripe crops.
Very good. We now have a basic stock of Food. As you can see, each Farmer can harvest 1x Food per day. After doing so, they're are exhausted and have to rest. You may train more Farmers to increase your daily production.
Another important resource is Lumber. Lumber is required to build almost every building. Currently we don't own a Sawmill. Therefore we cannot train any Lumberjacks yet. We also need Lumber to build a Sawmill. Bad situation, hm? Since we don't have any Lumber, we have to steal some. See that orc settlement back there? We have to attack them and steal their supplies.
Very good. Now we have enough Lumber to build a Sawmill. Once we have trained Lumberjacks then, we can produce our own wood. Now you know the basics of the game. I'll leave you to play on your own from now on. Build up our economy and save the country.
The text isn't that long. I always try to keep it short. I would be happy if someone helps me with proofreading. I would include you in the credits under "Writing".
Thanks a lot. :)
- Tw0Face













